Jane, I'm very sorry you are upset with the members here. I know no one meant any harm. Everyone is just feeling concerned for that grey.
I didn't see any posts actually accusing this family of abusing that bird. Some of the members felt badly for the bird, and wanted to see it have a stable home with the extra care & attention it needs to help overcome the abuse it suffered prior to that family acquiring him. This family is unable to do that because of all the traveling they do. At least that is my take on the posts here.
I believe that once plucking has started due to stress, or abuse, and is allowed to continue, it becomes a habit. (I'm sure someone here will correct me if I'm wrong.)
I hate to see you leave here over misunderstandings. I think if you reread these posts, you will find that perhaps you interpreted them differently than they were intended.
I'm sorry your grey does pluck it's feathers. You seem like you've done everything possible to find out the cause & help him. I commend you for that.
I understand there can be other reasons for plucking as well, and sometimes not. Best wishes, Penny