I am retired so my 6 month old grey is out of her cage almost all day. She loves to sit on the back of my typing chair or on her cargo net, or her boing, or on the playtop of her cage. She is free to go where and when she wants in these areas. They are all in my office where I am a lot. When I go into the other rooms my grey has playstands there. I do not let her sit on my tables or counters unless she is on a stand, she is never allowed on my shoulder. If she wants a skritch or to be held she comes to me. If I want to hold her I just go get her. If she wants to go back to her cage she just goes and I respect her space and she respects mine. If I don't want her on me or near me I just have her step up and take her where I want her to go. She has no problem going back into her cage when I want her to and can stay in it for long periods of times without problem. Can you hold your grey too much, yes. Respect their space, if they back away from you or nip at you or fly away all the time then respect that you grey wants some space. Remember that your new grey is a baby and will need a lot of rest and sleep time and needs to feel safe, secure and unafraid. The good thing is that you can mold your baby because she will be looking to belong to your flock as she has lost her original one (her siblings) and if she can trust you and feels safe she most likely will follow your lead. Enjoy your new baby but don't overwhelm her.