I have never pinned Charlies tallons,I prefere him to stay with me because he wants to.I am a believer in giving parrots choices.Such as if he wants to sit with me ,great, but if he wants his cage thats also fine.At two your grey is growing up and showing independance. I think you need to start from the beginning with the step up and trust building.He may well switch his preferred person from you to your wife,this often happens but you both can have a bond with the grey,just in a diferent way. Work on trust building and avoid situations such as the pinning that encourage biting.