Hello CeeCee and welcome to our family, so glad to hear you are going to commit to either a grey or an amazon, both are amazing creatures.
Its a myth that only females bond with males and vice versa, I have a female that is bonded to me, it just depends on the individual bird and the personality and you will hear conflicting stories because each bird is an individual in itself.
If you think you can handle an adult bird and whatever baggage it brings with it then by all means look into rescues and rehomed birds, many of them make excellent companions but many times they have come from questionable circumstances and if you have the time and patience to work with a difficult bird then it can be one of the most enjoyable things you will ever attempt.
If you decide to go with a baby then look for reputable breeders rather than pet stores for you never know what they may have been exposed to and what kind of treatment they may have received, usually breeders are more concerned about their babies and socialize them into family oriented situations. If you want to look for breeders by state you can go to this site: www.avianbiotech.com
Please read thru as many of the threads here for lots of ideas and suggestions from firsthand experience with greys, it will give you an insight into what you will be getting into and be sure to check out the amazon room.