JeffNOK

As I have read through this thread you have gotten much good advice. I appreciate you and your wife's dedication to your bird, and I believe you will find your way forward. Some of what you have written reminds me a little bit of my CAG Gracie. Gracie never EVER bites me at home. She is the sweetest most trusted parrot when she is in her comfort zone in her safe environment. However, over the last year, Gracie has started biting me when I take her to visit my parents. I took her to my parents' house during Father's day weekend. She flew to me and perched on my hand. She sat with me for a short time just preening and making cooing sounds. Then out of the blue without warning, Gracie bit the CRAP out me. I like to think that I know her body language, but I didn't see any indication of a bite coming. She then said, "Gracie bite Daddy. Ouchie!" My theory is that she is irritated that she doesn't have my undivided attention and is punishing me. I try not to handle her much at my parents' house because she will bite me. The only time I KNOW she will not bite is when I tell her we are going home, and I put her in her travel cage. I wonder if maybe you bird is bonded to your wife but feels neglected because she is away so much. The fact that your parrot talks a lot when your wife is out of the room confirms this to me. When I am with Gracie she chatters normally, but if I leave the room, she goes into motor mouth mode and talks non stop almost incessantly and urgently until I come back. I don't have any particularly bright ideas to help you, but I think this acting out has to do with your birds feeling of being neglected by your wife. Maybe if your wife spends some extra special time with your bird, it might help. On a side note, I spent about 4 years in Japan in the 1990s teaching English. I was in a small village on the Japan Sea (Wajima, Ishikakwa) for 2 years and then 2 years in Fukuoka. I miss Japan. Very interesting country. Where are you guys located. Welcome to the forum and good luck.

My CAG has a cage, but I leave the door open and she is free to do as she pleases during the day--even when I am at work. It didn't start out that way, though. As a young bird she was in her cage while I was away. It wasn't until she was about a year old, and I knew her ways and habits, that I realized it was safe to leave her out while I was gone. I live in a small condo and her area is more or less "bird proofed" from a safety standpoint. She stays in her cage, on her cage, or on her play stands at all times while I am away. It has worked for us, but I needed to be confident in her habits and ways before we went that direction. With a new baby there is so much still unknown.

This story really got to me. I am overjoyed for Raju;s new freedom, but angry at the same time that it was denied for 50 years.

Wonderful to read of Inara's growth and progress. She seems to be a delightful little grey. My Gracie will be three in two weeks as well. We still have a long journey ahead.

How heartwarming! I am glad that your daughter's homecoming was so welcoming.

It was very similar with my CAG Gracie. She said a few words here and there by 10 months, but that "switch" you referred to went on at 14 months and it has been non-stop ever since. I look forward to hearing more of you grey's linguistic progress. It is a lot of fun!

Pam, it is probably true that long kept pet greys will be reluctant to breed. If they breed, they often distance themselves from people and become less loving companions. The fact that your family was going through the trauma of surgery and hospital stays likely contributed to stress and plucking. You mentioned in one of your posts that "Asia always had a wing clipped." Did you mean that Asia has just one wing clipped or both? I may have misunderstood, but if you choose to clip, it is best to have both wings clipped. The imbalance can be a problem.

I also have ask the question about separating them. Why do you feel it is necessary to keep them in one cage together? You say they are "getting along". I am not sure exactly what that means, but a hand raised pet bird sharing a cage with a breeder male of still unknown temperament is a recipe for disaster. Sterling was not exaggerating when he mentioned potentially deadly consequences. I know you are sensitive and don't want to be fussed at. I hope we don't seem critical or judgmental, but our hearts' first priority is the well-being of your birds. Is getting another cage a financial burden? Is space an issue? I am just wondering what the reason is that you are taking this risk. I would not be able to live with myself if something terrible happened, and I hadn't said anything. I hope you will think long and hard about your decision to house them together. Building your relationship with JW might also go better if he had his own space.

My thoughts and prayers are with you. You did everything you could.

It is very hard to diagnose what makes parrots bite. Gracie tends to bite me with regularity whenever I go my parents house. She has never bitten anyone else--only me. These birds are mysteries. I am sorry you had that experience and hopefully all will go well when your daughter returns home.

I have no words for the anger and sadness that cohabitate in equal measure in spirit. It is just beyond belief. On the flip side, the love and dedication exhibited here on the forum warms my heart and gives some measure of hope,

It is great that Inara likes her showers. What is even cooler is that she uses language to ask for what she wants. The more they know language gets results, the more they use it.

I have no doubt greys can learn cool tricks, but for now I would focus on building your relationship and bonding with her. You have plenty of time for training after she gets settled. I would definitely just get to know her and build trust for the next several months before worrying about trick training.

I am so happy for you and Lulu. She is gorgeous. I know Louie and Lulu will find their way. How are the greys doing with the new addition? I suspect Ana Grey may be thinking to herself, "Well, there goes the neighborhood!".

We will see the pics in good time. I have a female CAG and I was like you. I had a definite preference for a female even though I couldn't justify it rationally. All I can say is that I am totally in love and devoted to her and she to me. The only disturbing thing is that she talks a lot and always in my voice--not very ladylike. Everyone is shocked she is a girl when they hear her talk. Otherwise it has been a wonderful journey and I can't wait to know more about your experience.

So, is this three week old grey fully in your care now? Do you have hand feeding experience? I don't want to assume anything, but I have the impression that the breeder sent a 3 week old grey home with you without proper instructions. If that is that case, please get support. Please let us know about your experience with parrots and especially very young baby birds. It is not the norm by any means that a breeder/vet would send a baby home with a new owner at such a young age. Please forgive me if I have misunderstood, but I am concerned and want you to have as much support as possible if you are in that position. Where are you from? Is the vet you referred to an avian vet or just a regular vet?

My CAG started saying her first words at about 10 months, but her language didn't really start to take off until about 14 months. As others have said, they all have the capability, but one can't predict what will happen. This is still early days, but I would recommend using a lot of language wherever possible with your grey. Make it fun and meaningful, and narrate your life in front of your bird. Talk about whatever you are doing and whatever your bird is doing. It seems odd, like talking to yourself at times, but I think that strategy works. If your TAG knows language gets results and affects its life, it is more likely that it will speak. Gracie my CAG learned that her words got reactions out of me and helped me meet her needs and respond to her, so she has been encouraged to use it. Whatever happens, you will have a great relationship with your grey regardless of human language. But just beware. Sometimes they say things you don't want to hear. Tonight when I put Gracie to bed, she spoke from behind her cover and said, "Gracie BITE Daddy! Ouchie! Gracie is a stinker!"

I have no doubt you may have a fleeting thought of "what was I thinking". But, if your experience is anything like mine, you will have many more moments when you think, "How was my life ever complete without a grey in my life?"

Katana, your post was fantastic. It is so true. All of us have been wonderful and horrible depending on the situation. Parrots are the same. When I first started doing research on parrots, I read the same stuff Dave mentioned (Greys are phobic pluckers and Amazons are aggressive and potentially dangerous.) Those worst case scenarios need not be the case. It is up to US who share our lives with these wonderful birds to provide the environment that encourages them to thrive. In many cases the worst comes out because the caregivers either don't do their homework or fail to invest the time, compassion, patience and understanding required for such complex creatures. I am not judging anyone. Frankly, I believe successful parrot "ownership" is really only the privilege of the "few". But what a lucky few we are. When I read Dave's post about his early days with Cricket, I was moved. How many people would have chosen to invest his heart the way he did in such a caring and gentle way? Cricket bloomed and all of us have been blessed by sharing in the experience. I believe that it is possible with almost all parrots unless they have been irrevocably traumatized. We underestimate the potential that parrots have as loving engaging companions. Thankfully, we see stories here on greyforums.net that can encourage is all to throw out the stereotypes and embrace a journey with unlimited potential.

Being bitten was a fear of mine before I got a grey. I really worried about that--almost above all else. Well, my CAG does bite me...always when we visit my parents-never at home. She bites pretty hard and it hurts, but what I have realized is that the pain of a bite really is no big deal most of the time. Yes, there is blood sometimes, but the actual physical pain is "ehh". What hurts most is emotional. I hate that my normally sweet baby would do that to me. I guess what I am trying to say, is "Embrace the Bite." I am not saying be foolish or push yourself on the bird or overstep bounds, but go into it saying, "So what if I get bitten?" Unless real aggression is involved, a bite isn't really so bad. As Dave said, do NOT put your face near the bird, but if you risk a little chomp on the hand here and there and realize it isn't so bad, you will be calm and the parrot will likely be calmer, too. I recommend that you talk and sing to the bird. Greys love that. Don't invade space with toys or hands. My grey doesn't want me touching her toys--even to hand them to her. Dogs enjoy that kind of toy involvement and play, but most parrots--less so. Just engage the grey like an intelligent child and communicate with it like you expect it to understand, and you will be surprised at how things might progress. Good Luck!

My CAG Gracie will be three in July. She was never a typical cuddly baby--possibly because she was parent raised until 9 weeks. Rather than losing a cuddly baby, I have gained a loving friend. We get ever closer. That is not to say that she hasn't displayed terrible two tendencies. With Gracie, she is perfectly behaved at home in her comfort zone with me, but when we visit my parents she bites me. That all started just before her 2nd hatch day and has persisted. I think she is punishing me for taking her our of her familiar environment. The only time I know I am safe from a bite is when I tell her it is time to go home and she steps up to go back in her travel cage. She looks at everyone and says, "Gracie go bye bye in car! Go to Gracie's house. See ya later!" I have to take her to my parents house tomorrow because I am leaving town for a two day business trip. I worry that Gracie will be sharpening her beak the whole time I am away for that perfect moment to chomp upon my return.

Hi and welcome Nicola. I hope the second half of 2014 is ten times as wonderful as the first half was horrible. I can completely relate to your extra vigilance with Izzy. Whenever I read of a loss here in the forum, I spend a week giving my CAG Gracie extra attention. We are all glad you are here with us. I look forward to hearing more about Izzy and your family. Where abouts in the UK are you? I have friends in Sheffield and used to visit frequently (until I got my CAG 2 1/2 years ago--no travel since then). I miss England--especially in summer. Oklahoma is too HOT!

It actually seems this grey likes you very much. Greys do pick a favorite and allow more interaction from the "chosen one", but it appears from what you wrote that you get along pretty well. Will she step up on your hand from a perch? Can you return her to her cage? She also likely senses your fear and hesitation. That alone can encourage a bite. Her biting you when you reach for her may just be her way of saying, "I would prefer you keep your hands at a comfortable distance." It doesn't sound like she is aggressive toward you. She may just want to set boundaries.

It is something special when they call us by name. Gracie only knows me as "Daddy", but it warms my heart to hear her call out. I hope you can record Sully calling you. Is he camera shy? If Gracie knows I am trying to record anything, she becomes as mute as "The Mona Lisa".

Gracie my CAG says all kinds of complimentary things, but they are all about herself! "Gracie is gorgeous", "Gracie is smart", "Daddy loves Gracie", "Gracie is a good bird." I try to get her to flip the script and compliment me, but she just looks at me like "are you kidding me with this?" I am glad your sweet Brutus is showing care and admiration toward you. You deserve it, and I'm sure he means every word.