neoow

I got Alfie when I was 17 and thought I had everything sussed. I had read every book available to me (the internet wasn't as easily accessible and full of information as it is now) and thought I'd never have any issues with owning a grey. I don't regret getting Alfie at all as I love having him in my life. But as I mentioned in my previous post, it hasn't always been plain sailing. My mum was the only person who took a real interest in Alfie when I was living at home with my family. My sister was terrified of him and my dad was largely indifferent. He used to sit and play guitar and sing to Alfie but they had a bit of a falling out when Alfie waddled across the sofa, sat on my dad's knee then bit him very hard on his finger for seemingly no reason. Dad wasn't keen after that. My mum got a bit more wary of him after receiving a few bites too- but she's always remained interested in him... just kept out of beak range for a while 😂. We also had a dog and a cat. So Alfie was largely confined to my room or I had to wait until everyone was out if I wanted to let him out in the wider house. Which meant he didn't get much socialisation from anyone other than me. When I moved out I originally lived with two guys- one who was scared of Alfie and one who was largely indifferent but not keen. Alfie's cage location wasn't great and socialisation wasn't great around that time either. I also took on more and more responsibility (and hours) at work, was trying to study for a degree in my spare time and I wasn't providing Alfie with the consistent time and attention he deserved and needed. And again, not much socialisation with anyone other than me. My two housemates moved out and I was able to shift things around so at least Alfie was in the living space instead of out in the hall. But my next housemate also was quite indifferent to him and didn't care to socialise with him for the longest time. He also despised the noise.. and Alfie isn't even THAT noisy compared to some parrots. He moved back home with his dad as we were renting at the time and he didn't like losing all the money each month. So I started looking to buy my own place. That housemate became my lodger but I made it extremely clear before he moved in- Alfie ALWAYS comes first and I WOULD be letting him out of the cage every day, so if he didn't like it, he'd have to avoid the living room when Alfie was out. Fortunately, my housemate did start to make a bit more effort with Alfie that time round and they actually started to get on. He moved out in 2020 so it's been me and Alfie ever since. My main point here for your friend's 13 year old (and sorry for the second essay!) is that it's much easier if family and even some friends are on board with getting a grey and are willing to make the effort and work with the bird too. It can be really tricky to manage if other members of the household are terrified of birds or aren't interested. And even when you think you have the whole world worked out as a teenager... life will ALWAYS throw you curveballs that you never dreamed of. My main questions when a 13 year old asks about getting a grey would be- what about when you move out or go to college/university or get a job/career. What if you have to move away from family for work/career/life? What if you want to start a family with someone who doesn't like birds? You can't plan for every eventuality of course, but you have to be prepared that there is a bird who will be with you for ALL of those changes and is depending on you to look after them regardless of what changes may happen. Is the family willing to take on the responsibility when the teenager can't/won't? And are THEY aware of what they are letting themselves in for?

I've seen birds of all ages up for adoption, younger birds as well as older birds. People rehome for many reasons - some people don't do their research and realise how much time birds need or how messy and noisy they can be. Some people start a family and can't cope with managing the pets as well as the new baby. Some people have a change of circumstances- they might have to move where they can't have pets, they lose their job and can't afford it etc etc. Maybe their jobs change and they are working so many hours they can't provide what the bird needs any more. Some people sadly pass away and their friends and relatives don't know the first thing about bird care and aren't interested to learn. Some people get ill and can no longer look after the birds. Personally, I would prefer someone rehomed an animal if they weren't able to provide the care it needed instead of holding on to it and making it's life a misery- like in Sydney's example above. I've been in the situation where I had to seriously think about rehoming Alfie. The idea crushed me but I wasn't giving him what he needed at the time. My work/life balance was non-existent (all work), I was trying to study in the free time I did have, I had some personal issues going on, I shared a house with people who had no interest in Alfie (and one was terrified of him) so it was difficult to manage his out of cage time. I decided to make a determined effort to make the changes needed to make it work for Alfie. And if I couldn't do it, then I would have rehomed him in the hopes that someone else could. It took me a while to turn it around but we're in a really good place now and I wouldn't be without him. I'm fortunate enough that I was able to make the changes needed at the time. Otherwise Alfie would have been yet another bird in a rescue centre and there was no guarantee that he would have found his forever home. Apologies for the essay and for derailing the conversation somewhat. 😕

After he throws it out, does he climb down and eat it later? Sometimes Alfie will throw stuff out of his bowl only to go retrieve it later. You can get some bowls which click into place and the bird can't pick it up and tip it out... doesn't stop them scooping it out, however. Does he like foraging toys? You could put the food into a foraging toy instead of a bowl. Might slow him down a bit! 😂 Like you say, he's not starving himself. He gets plenty of food elsewhere. It's obviously just a little quirk of his.

I have no idea if there's much difference between males/females temperament wise. I call Alfie a male but actually have no idea if he's male or female. I was told he was a male but I've never had him DNA tested to confirm either way. Some people suggest males will bond better with female humans and females will bond better with male humans but I don't know how true that is. Alfie previously bonded to my male lodger and he also goes absolutely gooey for my mum. I've only ever had Alfie, so I have no other birds to compare him to on that point I'm afraid! I got Alfie as a baby (approx 11 weeks old) and finished off his weaning process. If I was going to get a second bird, I'd check rescues first I think. There are lots of birds in need of homes. Several members here have rescued birds and have amazing relationships with them.

They seem to like a routine and will fall in line with yours. They do benefit from getting a lot of sleep overnight in a dark/quiet space so you may have to consider this if you're getting a bird up early. With Alfie I work 8-9 hours a day and whilst most of that is working from home these days previously I had to be on site all day, 5 days a week. So Alfie would come out of his cage to play in the evenings for 2-3 hours and longer at the weekends where possible. When I'm working from home I have a second cage upstairs in my office so he can come and join me and we keep each other company. On quieter days I'll let him out in the office so he can play on his tree and around the room. When I let him out of his bigger cage downstairs he has the whole downstairs of the house to play in. I also have two cats so he doesn't get the full run of the house, I have to keep them separated when Alfie is out and about. When I'm on site for work and Alfie is left in his cage he has plenty of toys to play with and foraging opportunities and I leave the radio on for him.

I saw and responded to a thread from a new member asking about parrot ownership and just thought it might be useful to have a thread on the best parts of parrot/grey ownership as well as some of the worst. A lot of videos and social media sites always seem to promote the best things about parrots and maybe sugar coat some of the 'bad' or undesirable parts of parrot ownership. So... what would be on your good, bad and ugly lists in relation to living with parrots? Good Greys make great companions. It's a very rewarding experience. I've been learning about training the last few years and getting a successful recall or when Alfie asks to play our little colour game is very rewarding. Bad The mess from dust, dropped food and shredded toys is never ending. You can't be too house proud with a parrot around 😂 Poop. Everywhere. Ugly The occasional 'unpredictable' bite which can really hurt your feelings! And of course, some parrots WILL draw blood. (I'm very thankful Alfie is not one of them) What would you add to these lists?

I'm in the middle of some house renovations in the house (having the kitchen replaced and some other bits of work in the living room/dining room). So I've had lots of contractors coming round and measuring up. Alfie likes when they use the laser pointers to measure, as they make a little beep noise that he can mimic. He managed to confuse one contractor a couple of times because Alfie was making the beep noise before he'd pressed the button to get the measurement. 😂

Hi A.K, welcome to the forums! There is a wealth of information here so it's worth taking some time to read back through the archives. I'm afraid I can't point you in the direction of any any vets/breeders/rescues etc in your area as I'm across the pond in the UK. In terms of criteria for living with parrots and greys in particular I'd probably go with the following: - You need to have lots of time. Parrots need lots of time and attention. They aren't just going to sit in the corner looking pretty. They want to be involved in the family (their flock) as much as possible. Someone once described parrots as being like toddlers with a can opener attached to their face. I can't agree with this more! - You need to be patient. This is so important with greys. They do everything in their own time. You can't rush them. They can be extremely change adverse at times... new toys are scary! New perches will eat them! Sometimes even new hairstyles/clothes on their human's are worrisome too. You have to work at their pace, not yours. - You need to be tolerant. Parrots are not domesticated animals like dogs and cats. They are smart, intelligent beings with a lot of their wild instincts left. They will quickly learn how to push your buttons. They can be noisy, they are messy, they can be destructive. They can be trained but positive reinforcement is key. Parrots will never react well to shouting or punishments. Greys make for wonderful pets and companions. They will quickly take over your life and you'll never remember what it was like before you had one. And yes, they are a massive commitment - basically similar to having a child. But they are incredibly rewarding in their own very unique way.

Alfie does exactly the same- he'll throw or push something off his shelves and make the 'oop!' noise that I make when I drop something. 😂

Alfie is terrible with toes/feet too. I have to keep them well out of his way. He doesn't really spend much time on the floor so when he does go on it he doesn't run around, he takes slow deliberate steps and takes everything in. Only time I see him running is when he's on his shelf and he's attacking his foot toys.

Haha these are all really funny! I'm sure I have loads of stories with Alfie but I'm struggling to think of many right now. He learned the sound of the smoke detector when we were still living at my parents house. My mum went through a spell of burning everything and setting off the smoke alarm. Unfortunately Alfie associated the noise with my mum being in the kitchen, so whenever she walked past his cage to go to the kitchen he'd start beeping like the smoke alarm! My dad had been round lots to help with the garden and if he wanted to called me he'd walk into the house and yell "Trina!" and then I'd respond or come downstairs. One day he had finished in the garden, told me he was leaving then left. A little while later I heard "Trina!" in my dad's voice from downstairs. I assumed he'd forgotten something and come back so I went downstairs... but he wasn't there and his car was still gone. It was Alfie. He nailed the voice PERFECTLY. When we were still living with my parents if my mum called me from downstairs Alfie would answer "WHAT" in my snotty teenager tone. 😂

Alfie has always preferred whistles and noises over words. He knows the odd word and phrase and he does like to mumble sometimes. But he LOVES to whistle. He'll regularly whistle his own tunes as well. The worst noise he ever learned was in my previous house. His cage was in the hall near the front door and he learned the noise of the key turning in the lock. Which wasn't a problem until I was home alone one night, knowing full well my two housemates were out all night... then I suddenly hear a key turning in the lock and start panicking that someone is letting themselves in. 😂 It took me a good few moments to realise it was Alfie!

Never ever try and rush things with a grey. I believe from your posts that you have only had your second bird Bubbles for a month or thereabouts. Moving to a new home with new people, new animals and a new routine is a massive upheaval for a bird. They need time to settle down and familiarise themselves with their new environment and everyone/everything in it. This can take a while on it's own. And then suddenly there's another grey encroaching on their cage/space. You have to go at your birds' pace, not your own. It may take weeks, it may take months. But every time you try and force a grey to do something they really don't want to do you could set their progress back. Similarly, your first grey, Ziggy has suddenly had a new bird appear in his space- so that's a change that he needs to get used to as well. He may be a bit more curious than Bubbles as he's already familiar with your home, routine and family etc. But he still may take some time to get used to the new addition, especially if he's been an only bird for a while. It's also worth noting that your greys may NEVER get on. That's always a possibility and one you'll have to manage if it happens. This is one reason why I haven't added another bird to my house- I've had Alfie for 18 years and he's used to being an only bird. I'd only ever consider adding a second bird if I knew I could give them enough time and attention separately and away from each other, if they didn't get along.

Wow sounds like you definitely have your hands full with her! Wishing Tinkerbell a very speedy recovery! I don't know if it's true but I always get the impression that conures think they are bigger and stronger than they actually are... I quite often see stories of them getting into scrapes where they picked on another bird and came off worse.

I love all of the stories of your greys seeking you out! Alfie's main cage is in the living room - which is open plan with the dining room and kitchen. I have two cats so when he is out of his cage I have to shut them upstairs and he gets the downstairs. He mostly amuses himself but if I start cooking dinner he'll usually fly over to the dining table to see what I'm up to and if I go back to the sofa he'll usually fly back over to his shelves above the sofa or he'll come and join me on the sofa. It's very cute to have a bird shaped shadow following me around. He has a second smaller cage upstairs in one of my spare bedrooms where the computer is so that we can keep each other company whilst I work from home. If I have a quieter day then I'll let him out in the room but have to keep the door shut because of the cats. He has a java tree on my desk and another shelf to play on, plus the play top on his cage, which he still doesn't particularly like being on. He'll often come and sit on the back of my chair to supervise me at work.

I much prefer this place to facebook groups or whatever else. I do have a twitter account for Alfie but it's more just for fun and showing his antics rather than seeking serious help/advice. Facebook groups are hard to keep up with and generally there are always some grumpy/mean people who judge quickly and are less than helpful. I don't post in the groups I'm a member of, I just keep half an eye out in case I see something useful or interesting. This forum holds a wealth of knowledge from many people who have dedicated to posting time throughout the years. I have learned so much from this place and I am forever grateful for it's existence and for those who keep it running. I check in regularly but unfortunately don't always have much to say!

I feel if I touched Alfie's toes or beak I might lose a finger. 😄 He is very much his own bird and I can only scratch his head when he lets me or wants me to. I managed to get a good few head scritches in earlier this week but then yesterday he was back to rotating his head out of the way and looking at me as if to ask what the heck I thought I was doing. Yet when he sees my mum he just melts. I love that they have a relationship but I am also fairly envious at the same time! 😂

Yeah I can imagine losing all the feathers at once would be pretty shocking! I panicked with just these four! Thankfully though, all is good is Alfie's world and I was being paranoid. 😄

How is Muńeca settling in, @SRSeedBurners?

Welcome back! So good to hear from you! Sorry you have had a bad run of it with the illness but glad you're feeling better now! I love hearing what HRH Inara gets up to. Her speech and use of language always amazes me. Alfie is mostly a non-talker apart from a few odd words and phrases. He much prefers sounds and noises, especially whistling. I think he also prefers male voices as he seems to pick up words from male voices much easier than female ones... but unfortunately there are no males in the house! I know what you mean when you talk about worrying what will happen to our birds if anything should happen to us. At the moment I don't have a solid plan for Alfie. None of my family or friends are interested enough to take him on. Some are petrified of him. I was hoping maybe my nephew would take a liking to animals and particularly Alfie but unfortunately he's not interested at all. Although my sister is really scared of him so she definitely wouldn't appreciate my nephew bringing him home!! 😂 At the moment I think the only option would be to pass him to a sanctuary if anything happened to me. It's that or a rescue organisation who could rehome him.

Alfie is one of those birds who rarely, if ever, draws blood. The only time he has ever drawn blood is when he got my mum in the ear and on the nose when he was a baby. I'm thankful for that, because even with no blood he can hurt and leave a mark when he wants to! The only time I've been bitten recently is when he was playing on his shelf trying to push his big wooden crate off the shelf (on to my head) so I sat on the sofa with a hand on the box to keep it on the shelf. Alfie figured out that I was the reason why his box wasn't moving, climbed on to the box, shuffled round the edge then leant down and bit me on the finger. It didn't hurt as it wasn't a proper bite- just a 'hey, get off my box'. But it caught me by surprise as I wasn't paying attention! 😁

They do like to keep us on our toes, don't they?! I'm so glad Dorian is fine- I would have been the same and would have panicked too. Alfie also gave me a scare recently- he loves shredding up cardboard boxes. I put a box on his shelf to destroy when he was out of the cage and he was busy working away on it. I didn't realise but he had climbed inside the box and was chewing it from the inside. He then managed to tip the box off the shelf... with him still inside it. The box landed next to me on the arm of the sofa - it had probably fallen a couple of feet with him flapping inside it. I paused for a split second as I wasn't sure if he'd injured himself or how best to get him out then very carefully lifted the box and put it on the sofa so he could climb out of the hole he had made. He was fine, thankfully. I checked him over and watched him like a hawk for a while to make sure there were no signs of injury. Thankfully he landed on the soft sofa instead of the hardwood floor! I now leave boxes in his cage where he can't fall anywhere and put old magazines/catalogues on his shelves to shred. At least he can't climb inside those!

Their favourite person can change over time. I have always been Alfie's main/sole caregiver but I'm not always his favourite person. He took a shine to one of my previous housemates and he absolutely loves my mum, despite the fact we don't live with her. He is fine with me because I'm the only person he lives with now, so I think he just puts up with and tolerates me. I can't give him head scritches like my mum does. He absolutely melts when we go and visit her. It's sickening. 😂 We went through a period of time when Alfie wouldn't step up for me and would bite instead. There had been a lot of changes and upheaval in the house around that time and I'd also decided to cut my hair short around the same time, so I think that irked him somewhat. A couple of times he flew to the back of my head just to bite me too. It put a real dent in our trust of each other so I had to take a big step back and go back to basics with him. I started target training and if I needed him to step up I'd use a perch, as I didn't have the confidence to present my hand/arm to him in case I got a bite. I found he has a love of pine nuts so they are reserved for training only- he doesn't get them in his food. We're doing so much better now. I can't remember the last time I got bitten because we have learned to trust each other again. If I ask him to step up he will now turn or step away if he's not ready instead of biting me. He knows I will respect his space and I will give him an option to say no to my request. I still can't give him head scritches very often... but I'll take it over being bitten any day! If your family are still keen to work with Lulu then they probably need to take a step back and stop putting themselves in a position where a bite may occur. If you know which treats she will do anything for then get your family to offer those instead of you- so that they become a bit more desirable. Lulu will probably always have a favourite person but with patience, training and tasty treats, she might come to realise that the rest of your family are ok too and stop biting. It might be best to get Lulu stepping up on a perch for family instead of hands/arms for a while. And they can use target training so they can interact with her and reward her- but from a safer distance where a bite is less likely to occur. It's really important that each of your family members are confident and calm when interacting with Lulu. If they are nervous or scared then she'll pick up on that. So like others have said, they might just need to take a bit more of a hands off approach for now and slowly start to work with Lulu to regain trust and build a relationship with her.

Yes they do seem to form their own opinions about different people. My biggest problem is finding people who are willing to put the effort in with him. He isn't overly socialised because most people I know are either scared of him or aren't interested!

That's why I gave it to him early, before Christmas. I was sure he would take a while to warm up to it. He gave it a bit of side eye on the first day then hopped right up the second day! Now whenever he plays on his shelves he'll have a little rummage around, climb in and start digging toys out.