katana600

No wonder she always guards her small doors and tries to bite me when I change her food and water. She has them adjusted just the way she wants them and doesn't want me to get any ideas about putting locks on them. My house is well toddler-proofed and I am thinking it gives her such a source of empowerment and if it helps her along the path to find her mojo, I may not worry about her getting out. If we step up vigilance in the morning to be certain she is in her cage, I may not batten down the hatches just yet. As she gains insight and learns new strategies, her techniques are getting more sophisticated. She is an amazing little mind bender. That gate across the foyer entry has become her neutral zone. Although she still refuses occasionally she consistently will step up to either of us. Going to the gate is a signal of her willingness for an adventure. This weekend she was trying to woo David back in the room after he showered. I offered to take her to him and she willing went in to perch atop the bathroom door. There as he was shaving, she regaled him with wolf whistles and hoots of approval. Then she laughed uproariously. It was contagious. Only I laughed so hard I couldn't pucker to whistle. For the first time she was so engrossed she didn't notice she was away from her cage. She refused offers to leave the bathroom and even stayed in there alone for ten minutes. I left her to allow her to save face and decide it was her idea to go back. She is opening a tiny little peek hole into her heart and mind. We are making progress.

We have had some interesting developments. On Friday, I awakened early and was sitting quietly, in the dark, reading on the computer. When I was taking the dogs out, I heard "Hey" coming from an unusual place for that hour. Gilbert was out of her cage, sitting on the gate. I was sure David had let her out of her cage. Sometimes he will do that if she gets noisy when he is up so much earlier than me. As it turns out, a bit later she was out walking around on the floor, in the dark. When she was ready, she climbed back into her cage and closed the door. She has been doing midnight reconnaissance missions walking about in the dark! I've "floated" the sofa and left room to walk all the way around it. I have been finding her droppings behind there and thought it was because she is more apt to explore when I am busy and David is in the room with her. When I asked he said she hasn't been doing that. I have not figured out yet how she is opening her cage, but she has. I think its possible she goes in and pulls it closed and it doesn't latch, then she comes out later on her own accord.

I got to laughing at that picture. Can you imagine an intruder coming in to be greeted by the sentinel? When he hears "Come on Brutus" he will be sure you have a big dog in the house and high tail it right out of there. What an adorable greeting for you though.

Good that you are so observant and prepared for anything. I'm glad you caught it early so there wasn't a long term effect. It always seems this kind of thing with our birds or kids happen in the out-of-office hours, doesn't it? How did Peck handle the adventure?

Oh goodness, I just logged out, went to the home page to try it. There no longer was there a place to log in. When I tried to select "home" it redirected to the foreign language page you mentioned. On the top line under the unusual characters, it said "Let my people go" in English. Then I went back trying to get to the "forums page" to log in and was redirected to that same foreign language page. Luckily I have the forums link saved as a favorite and got back in that way.

Great idea on the perch mounted on the outside of the cage. We had tried that in the past when she wasn't ready and I almost forgot about it. Since she can only tolerate touch if she has bars between us, it gives me an idea to create a safety zone away from her cage but with a set of bars that might help her transition from guarded head rubs to open air closeness when she is ready. It's odd that she wants to come out when David is home. I thought it was an indictation she liked him better. Time is not bearing out that theory. Maybe two or more people stimulate a "flock" instinct. Whatever the theory, nothing good will happen until Gil comes to decide she is ready. I am enjoying each phase of her evolution. Every time she advances toward me, I meet her where she is, try to give her incentive to step out of her comfort zone and always give her an exit strategy so she can choose retreat.

Little Miss Gil-girl continues to come down to sit on the wooden gate as her "offer" to come to us. I keep our sessions short, her tolerance is still very low. She genuinely wants to oblige, but she gets absolutely panicked and wild with fear and nervous tension. I don't mind too much if she nervously chews her feathers occasionally. If she gets too nervous, its a sign she isn't ready and when I ask if she wants to go back, she is eager to rush to me knowing she will get right back to her safety zone. We are working up to five minute intervals away from the cage. She is much more interested when David is home and I use that to our advantage for this slow, steady process of acclimating her to change. She was on a very tall chair back in the kitchen and beginning to tremble and look toward her cage, when I offered to take her back, she put her head down to indicate not yet. David offered his hand and she tried to take a cobra strike bite out of him. That was our first indication that she is learning to outlast her fear. I had her next to me on the arm of the sofa last night and pulled a very interesting new treat from my little handbasket. She has never had a whole walnut in the shell. It kept her so preoccupied she didn't realize she was away from the cage for five minutes. It's pretty funny how she comes down to the gate, I stand up to come get her and she runs back to climb into her cage. Sometimes I sit on the stairs and wait for her to get brave again. Sometimes as soon as she turns to run, I tell her its okay and sit back down until she is ready. Its really tough when she isn't at all motivated with toys, very few foods and change is almost imperceptible. But a steady drip of water can wear a hole through a stone. I take the smallest step toward her and repeat until she accepts. She so enjoys the comfort of a head scratch when she hurries back inside to keep me outside the safety of those bars.

It is a reciprocal healing. I needed her after losing both our baby greys to PDD. I was bereft and thinking we could never again live with a grey because of that exposure when along came this little diamond in the rough. She has an unknown past and the risk vs benefit was what gave us both that second, third or fourth chance. I am so grateful for her good health and it was the best decision for all of us. She is my never ending source of pure gold to heal together.

If it were easy, the best of times might have been taken for granted. When she lifts her foot to me, it's a heart racing thrill. For her too. She reaches out confidently but when she realizes what she has done she looks around in a wild eyed panic. Sometimes she jumps off my hand and skitters away growling at herself. Sometimes she falters for a moment then regains her composure. She has really gotten to be possessed with running from anywhere in her cage to ask for a head rub. This week has been wonderful with one breakthrough moment after another. That picture and sentiment is dear to me. I had no idea about the Japanese culture and filling in the imperfections with gold. We moved extensively with my husbands career. When I unpacked after a move, there were always damaged and missing items. I would fix the broken things and called scrapes and scars in furniture "patina" that tells our story. When I see them, I don't think about what we lost, but the friendships gained along the way. I like this gold filled patina idea. Thanks. Your words are a joy to my soul.

I have kept the faith and it was you and all our supporters on the forum saying to hold back. The prevailing grey time wisdom has been to let her come at her own pace. i try to keep my expectations in line with her ability to find her path. I really was able to accept and love her at her lowest point and just know inside it was the best I could offer because its about her learning to trust. We just don't know where she has been for her early years. Some of her life was really wonderful, she says such sweet, kind things. Her other language and behavior shows a less wonderful side and its sad to know she was lonely and abandoned. When I look at other greys going from one home to another, Inara and Sophie for instance, I realize Miss Gilbert is an exception. We needed each other and mostly what I do is wait and when I feel helpless to "do" something to change her life, I use that energy to push away thoughts that I have "damaged goods". She isn't broken. I love to fix everything and this was my time in life to learn not to do, just to be. It was so enthralling to see her sitting calmly next to me and for her to offer me her foot to hand her to David and then to know when she was asking to go back. Every positive exchange creates her new history. Thank you a million times to this entire forum who guided us, shared wisdom and cheered on this little girl. She is worth it.

Gilbert has been quiet for a couple of days. It's usual for her to have to withdraw and think about things when she is trying new things. I moved a dog gate to a different place and now its near her cage. She will come off her cage and stand on the gate. This is now her invitation to me that I can offer her my hand and she will step up. After a couple of days of this she is starting to raise her foot when she sees me coming. She sat next to me on the arm of my chair for almost twenty minutes, then sat on David's arm and shoulder. I noticed she was getting real still like when she is nervous but she dint ask to go back. When I asked her she was eager to go back. Then she was so nervous she chewed off a pile of feathers from her chest. She may just need to do this as a stress relief. Right after I found the mound of fluff in her cage she invited a very long head scratch session. She is tucking her head and pressing right up to the bars to allow me to rub way down her neck to her shoulders. It's awkward to get my fingers through the bars. We are so close to having this touch time away from her cage. When she realizes its safe, she is going to jump right in with both feet. She has made remarkable progress in just a few weeks.

You've been missed Dan. You have your hands full there. Glad your work schedule allowed for you to support Kim. All your work still gets done. When you work from home, your hours just get longer. :-) I enjoyed Dayo's chat. I thought I heard him say William a couple of times. That's a new one isn't it? He sure is a happy guy. Thanks for the update.

Ah Sterling, one is assuming you were sane prior to the ear piercing shrill. Would you believe... I played that video just one time and it kicked Miss Gilbert into high gear. She has been doing it often since she heard it. It cured me of the "Oh how I wish she could fly" and "Oh how wonderful it will be when she wants to be near me". It's only been a couple of days and I can begin to imagine your frustration. I have only heard Java answer back with the shrill once and it stopped me in my tracks. Lord help me if they both get on this "kick" at top volume.

Great find at a bargain price. Thanks for sharing.

Do you think GreycieMae is doing this more since you got the new baby? She may be warning him that he will get what Toby did if he tries to get close to her chosen human. I smile at the thought of her pulling out your earplugs. My husband will wear his headphones to avoid hearing me sometimes too. And I just have to snatch one right off so I get my airtime. I think I might try one of Greycie's shrill whistles next. Instead of teaching her, I may have learned an undesirable trait instead. :-)

Gil was traumatized when I got her and she would lean and posture for a scratch, head bowed, but she was trembling. She only tolerated about ten seconds of touch before spinning and biting me hard. The thing his, she had someone loving early in her life and she wants the touch. She comes close to ask, but gets nervous. The first thing I did was hand her almonds, then eventually pine nuts through the cage bars. When she asked for a "tickle" as she called it, she would grasp the bars with her foot. I would put my finger on the outside and hold just her toenail. There was a reason for that. When she would suddenly panic at the sound of a car door closing in the neighborhood she would lash out and try to bite me. I'd keep her toe between my finger and her beak and that was the beginning. Gilbert had not tolerated touch for five or six years. The mantra I had was to always quit while I was ahead. If she could tolerate twenty seconds of touch, I quit at ten. How close does Gracie let you get your hands near her? Does she step up? Do you think she would let you use Inara's idea of touching her gently on the top of her head with a chopstick? The chopstick method may be a great beginning. If she tolerates that and even grows fond of a gentle scratching you could cut a little off the chopstick at a slow pace until your hand is close enough to eliminate the chopstick. Birds naturally preen each other on the back of the head where it's hard for them to reach. Gilbert allows me to move only in one direction, like petting a cat. I must never speak when I touch her but lately she seems to enjoy when I sing gently and quietly.

Gilbert makes that same sound! She does it as a "danger" siren and she knows it is obnoxious. It is absolutely piercing through and through. Luckily, she only does it to alert us that she is upset or nervous. I honestly don't know what I would do if she started this on a regular basis. I usually affirm to her "Gilbert's okay" and for whatever reason, she seems reassured and doesn't repeat it. Whatever reason caused GreycieMae to initiate this is probably not why she persists. There has to be a way to reach her. They are so darn intelligent it's hard to figure out. You can guarantee she knows she is vexing you. Was there a turning point at which she started doing this or escalating? Thinking backwards, if you can find what initiated it, you might be able to address it. My heart goes out to you, bless your eardrums.

Thanks Penny, I just noticed some expressions of frustration on the chat portion and started thinking its been a little while seeing some of the newcomers. I was really "green" and nervous when I joined and it was a little intimidating to learn how a forum works. I wasnt sure if it was just me, or if it was a brief time of change during the update. Thank you so much for looking out for the forum. So many lives are improved as we support one another in doing our best for our companions.

Welcome to you and your grey, we learn from each other. Our greys are as individual as the homes and people in their lives. It's nice to have you join us and share what you have learned while enjoying your life with Woody.

Lady Gilbert is getting more interested in coming away from her cage. She climbs to a spot which is on her cage top directly above her "scratching" or petting perch. That is the nearest distance to our living room seating. She will sit for a spell with her back to us. It looks ever so much like she is praying for courage. Then, in due time she turns to face us. Soon enough she will start preparing for flight. She leans way down like a skier preparing to hit the big daddy of all slopes. She raises her wings and JUMPS. Her heart is telling her to soar but her stubborn streak of pessimism keeps those little toes wrapped around the cage in a white knuckle death grip. When I speak to her and encourage her she hasn't been ducking into her doorway to evade me. Once she stepped up when I offered. Since then she lifts her foot, almost willing to take the plunge but panics at the last moment when either of us get that close. She tries to fly to the floor and is all over the living room. At first I would "rescue" her and she was all happy to oblige but too nervous to stay long. Now we sit down, let her shake off a case if nerves and she eventually makes it over to our feet. Last night she stayed on the back of David's chair for a half hour. Another delightful little thing she is doing is delaying her bedtime by just a few seconds. Every night after a warm, relaxing scritch session, I reach behind me in the stair post to get my glass of water. She has a fresh dish in her cage, I just poured from my glass. But she wants a drink from my glass. And oh how she is parched. She slurps and guzzles the first drink. Then she clinks the edge if the glass. When I try to pull back she is suddenly so dry, a marooned desert castaway with her first offer of water, she makes the biggest show of how thirsty she is. It's so darn cute. She isn't going to admit she wants me to stay a little longer. She just got real thirsty. That's all. Tiny, tiny little seeds of hope. By this time next year I suspect she will decide it might be okay to stay here with us after all.

Has anyone else experienced trouble signing in from the home page? What I did to get around that is to change my favorites page to "What's New". Now I can sign in from the upper right menu bar. But I have gotten to think about new members not being familiar and maybe getting frustrated enough to just stop trying. In our chat area there have been some expressions of frustration from newcomers. On the other hand, Diana was able to get a post started. Is anyone else having difficulty with the home page?

Welcome Albert! Isn't he just a little charmer? There is something magical about being the chosen one. It's so good that you and Pat understand its nothing personal not to be chosen and you can patiently wait while Albert builds trust with him.

I thought I heard him saying his name as well as an owl impersonation. He seems very happy and involved in your life. You have made amazing progress together.

Did Mayzie seem timid prior to Gabby coming home? You may try taking her out of sight of Gabby, to your bedroom with the door close for instance. It may take a few attempts to see if that helps her be a little more calm and accepting of your touch. If she has been this way from the beginning it could be that she has to take longer to build trust. She is still so young and as yet unweaned so it's hard to tell how much is her innate personality, how much is natural adjustment to her new home and what part is the introduction to Gabby. Follow your instincts, try to find time to give each one special time with you and find your balance. I can understand your fears about developing a biting habit, but by respecting and going at Mayzie's pace, I don't think it will come to that. Talk reassuringly to Mayzie, let her know before you touch her, come up with a word that gives her a chance to accept your touch. You have a big dose of adjustment going on with a baby and the return of Gabby. I think it will take some time to sort through. My thoughts are with you during the transition and adjustment time. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug.

You are making me think of some things about cage placement and covering. Our greys especially do not like unpredictable surprises. Isaac may have been fine with being cover for the first couple of years and then when Daddy was sick, someone else was in his home and he may have first come to realize that not every familiar sound is Stephen. He may have matured to this thinking on his own without a stressor eventually and have gotten to the same conclusion. Whatever the root cause I agree with Sterling was spot on that Stephen is a dedicated bird whisperer for patiently finding solutions to bringing Isaac back to his glorious full feathered beauty. Well done Stephen, as always your relationship is inspirational.