Why SHOULDN'T I get an African Grey?

[FrightyDog]

I have found when asking advice, you get more negative responses so shoot. Why shouldn't I get an CAG? Some background information...

Age: 18 (going on 19)

School: College for a degree in zoology

Location: California

Working? : Yes

Lifestyle : I've never been to a party. I've never drank or smoked weed (very popular in Socal btw). I don't have many friends and don't go out very often. At one point (not too long ago) I still made time for my current pets. Of I were to get one tomorrow (trust me I won't ) I would play with it mornings (6:45-8:45 roughly) and/or nights (6-9 roughly). The rest of the day I either work or have school. I'd plan to leave a TV or radio on for him/her. My schedule for work is random so those hours may change (for example this Sunday I could play with it all morning but not night and Friday I would only play with it from around 11:30am-2 for the entire day). I'm a somewhat busy guy but I can make room for an animal.

Interests : animals, hence my major. I currently have 3 aquariums, a newly bought ball python, a crested gecko, and a husky (which is more a family dog than mine).

Disclaimer : I believe many of you may tell me not to get one because I am young and I should live my life. I will. Don't get me wrong, I like to have fun and I will, but that is a rare occurrence for me. If it happens more when I move (next year) it will not be enough to stop me from playing with the bird at least 2 hours a day. I'm an early bird and I sleep fairly late (midnight). I'm sure there are cons (as to anything) and you are more than welcomed to tell me . Just ask if you have any other questions. I do not have a gf atm, but when I did she didn't stop me from playing with my gecko. This bird would be bought in a year also so I can save money. Thanks and try not to tear me apart. Also if you have alternative birds you'd suggest, I'm open to it

[Echo's Mom]

HMMM, I see quite a few people have viewed your post, but no one has responded!

 

I'll jump in. Please keep in mind I have ONE African grey (almost 7 years old) (I used to have a quaker but she died two years ago). I also have a cat (declawed and about 4 years old, just got him 6 months ago) and a long coat German Shepherd Dog (almost 4 years old), so my experience is limited.

 

I've always had animals. From the time I moved out on my own (at age 18) to now, I've always had cats, and then added dogs, fish, ferrets, degus, hamsters, etc. In my late 30s I fell in love with a wild crow. I lived downtown and somehow I tamed this crow into eating out of my hand. From then on, I wanted a parrot. I did TONS of research. I went to community parrot meetings and spoke with people who have parrots. I was invited over to visit their homes to see their set ups, see the mess parrots make, hear how noisy they are, see how much damage they can do.

 

As an animal lover, and a pretty easy going gal, none of this really bothered me. I don't own $5000 sofas / tables, etc. (I shop at Ikea or upcycle furniture), so whatever would get destroyed could easily be replaced.

 

Your biggest "negative" - you're young. You have so much life ahead of you that having a parrot can and MIGHT make you resentful of things you want to do, but can't ... or you might just saw whatever and take off for the weekend. I am NOT saying you WILL do this, it's just something that people think about when they see "that age".

 

Of all the pets I have had, it's easy to board a dog, or have someone come over and feed the cats / fish / reptiles / hamsters, etc. It is NOT so easy to have someone come and look after your parrot, or even find someone who will take them to your home.

 

I'm lucky with my Grey - I have two parrot sitters that I trust fully with Echo, and she has a blast when she is at their house AND when mommy's NOT there. Neither one of these sitters can get near her if I am anywhere in the house. Plainly put, if Echo knows I am there NO ONE and I mean NO ONE can pick her up. Not even with her T-perch.

 

I was gone over night once, and I had the parrot sitter come and check on her to put her to bed. Echo was in her home, on HER turf. She couldn't catch her (Echo is fully flighted). So, Echo didn't go in her cage that night LOL ... and my friend told me that the next time I went away to just drop her off with her.

 

Parrots are EXPENSIVE. Just the parrot can be about $1000-$2000, and then there's the cage ($600-$1000) and the toys - millions and trillions ... take the US national debt ... that's about what parrot toys will cost you!

 

All kidding aside - they are expensive to "maintain." They can destroy anything and everything in their path. They can destroy a $40 toy in 5 minutes. Or, they can be absolutely terrified of that $50 toy and it sits in a box collecting dust for 5 years.

 

Parrots are very emotional and sensitive creatures. If / when you get a girlfriend ... how will you react if your parrots absolutely despises your girlfriend? Don't think it won't happen ... it has and does, and will continue to happen! You are IT for your parrot - you are EVERY SINGLE THING in the world to your parrot.

 

Some greys attack the phone when their owner is trying to talk to someone. Imagine what that beak and those wings can do when they are flying at your face and they are TICKED OFF?

 

I don't know how many pounds of PSI a parrot has in it's beak - but I can give my grey a walnut in the shell, and in the space of 5 seconds, she's cracked it open. Imagine that beak on your finger ... or your g/f's finger?

 

You mention you have a ball python and a husky.

 

Parrots are TERRIFIED of snakes ... so you won't likely be able to even have them in the same room. (Think prey and predator!)

 

Your husky ... well, my first dog was amazing with both my parrots (when I had the quaker). Echo used to groom my dog's ears, and preen her fur on her scruff and actually curl up and sleep in the crook of her neck. It was adorable.

 

My current dog would eat Echo in a heartbeat - Echo is lunch in a box as far as my dog is concerned - she simply has a MUCH higher prey drive and gets a VERY intense look in her eyes when she sees Echo flying around. That was enough for me. I never took ANY other chances.

 

You're a student ... are you going to keep living at home? Do you have neighbours?

 

Depending on where you live, your neighbours might not appreciate your grey squawking it's head off at 6 am an 6pm ... or even throughout the day.

 

I live in suburbia and have a huge lot. Echo's room is in the basement. If I am outside working in the garden and she's calling for me, I can hear her as if I was in the same room. She's THAT loud. I can hear her across the street at my neighbour's house when she's whistling for me to come home.

 

If you live in an apartment building people will NOT (and actually don't have to!) tolerate that level of noise!

 

So I've covered most of what I can think, I'm sure there's a million more things that I could have covered!

 

Lots of luck, and hopefully others will chime in!

 

Marion

[Luvparrots]

My you do have a nice menagerie of pets. How do you find the time for them all.

 

I find that greys like habit. They like schedules and not so much change. If you can fit a grey into your schedule and be consistent with it, I see no problems. It seems you have thought out being owned by a grey. Frankly, I personal would wait until you are out of school, working and in a more or less permanent living situation. But then I always look at the future when I plan things. I got my greys when I retired.

[neoow]

I got my grey Alfie when I was 17. I was still living at home, at school most of the week and working in a pet store on Saturdays (oh how I miss that 10% discount!!).

 

A couple of years back I had to seriously consider whether or not I was a suitable grey owner. My lifestyle had obviously changed so much from when I was 17. I ended up working in ICT and worked my way up the ladder- I'm now managing the department. The more responsibilities I took on, the harder I worked, the more I took on and the less time I had for Alfie. I was also trying to study for a degree. Whenever I was home I was exhausted or had to study/work overtime and didn't spend enough time with him. I felt awful and I seriously considered giving him up because of it. Something had to give. However, the more I thought about it I realised there was no way I could give Alfie up. So I gave up on the degree. I also moved home shortly after because I bought my own place (I was renting previously) and I was able to set things up to suit Alfie better. My computer is now right next to his cage, so he gets far more attention because when I'm not at work or asleep, I'm with him. So even when I'm working extra hours from home, I'm now socialising with Alfie at the same time.

 

Parrots are a lifetime of commitment. And whilst it may seem super easy when you're 17 (or 18-19 as you are) it's really not. I'm not saying this to sound patronising (and I'm REALLY sorry if I come across that way) I'm just saying that I have had Alfie for 12 years and I'm not in the place I thought I would be when I was 17. Life has thrown me so many curveballs in that time and FORTUNATELY Alfie has stuck it out with me. The only thing he hasn't had to contend with is me finding someone to settle with. Sure, there's been the odd boyfriend here and there along the way- but nothing serious. Alfie has never had to contend with that. I am extremely lucky that Alfie isn't a plucker, doesn't scream the house down and generally doesn't destroy everything he can get his beak on.

 

Honestly? I wouldn't say 'don't get a parrot'. I would say wait another couple of years at least. Get school out of the way, get into a job/career started. Get settled in a house/flat/whatever. Travel, if you're so inclined. Get all that out of the way first. I know they're fantastic animals and totally fascinating and I honestly understand that you may want to own one sooner rather than later (been there, done that!). But it would be better to be sure that you can give your parrot the life it deserves because you're in a secure job, have a secure home and the finances needed rather than get one now and assume life will go exactly as planned and be hunky dory all the way through.

Edited April 13, 2015 by neoow

[Dave007]

I have found when asking advice, you get more negative responses so shoot. Why shouldn't I get an CAG? Some background information...

Age: 18 (going on 19)

School: College for a degree in zoology

Location: California

Working? : Yes

Lifestyle : I've never been to a party. I've never drank or smoked weed (very popular in Socal btw). I don't have many friends and don't go out very often. At one point (not too long ago) I still made time for my current pets. Of I were to get one tomorrow (trust me I won't ) I would play with it mornings (6:45-8:45 roughly) and/or nights (6-9 roughly). The rest of the day I either work or have school. I'd plan to leave a TV or radio on for him/her. My schedule for work is random so those hours may change (for example this Sunday I could play with it all morning but not night and Friday I would only play with it from around 11:30am-2 for the entire day). I'm a somewhat busy guy but I can make room for an animal.

Interests : animals, hence my major. I currently have 3 aquariums, a newly bought ball python, a crested gecko, and a husky (which is more a family dog than mine).

Disclaimer : I believe many of you may tell me not to get one because I am young and I should live my life. I will. Don't get me wrong, I like to have fun and I will, but that is a rare occurrence for me. If it happens more when I move (next year) it will not be enough to stop me from playing with the bird at least 2 hours a day. I'm an early bird and I sleep fairly late (midnight). I'm sure there are cons (as to anything) and you are more than welcomed to tell me . Just ask if you have any other questions. I do not have a gf atm, but when I did she didn't stop me from playing with my gecko. This bird would be bought in a year also so I can save money. Thanks and try not to tear me apart. Also if you have alternative birds you'd suggest, I'm open to it

 

 

 

OH, TO BE 19 YRS OLD AGAIN:rolleyes:. Those were the days. So many women, never knowing what exciting surprises was around the corner with those girls, no online dating, No HIV, the best weed, disco dancing, muscle cars, Woodstock. Yes, yes, those were the days my friend. Oh well, just memories will have to do now.

 

http://www.greyforums.net/forums/showthread.php?200425-The-african-grey-have-i-done-my-homework

[Echo's Mom]

OMG I know eh? Those WERE the fun days!

[Talon]

Echo's Mom wrote a very detailed, thought provoking post. Not much too add to hers, but I am in my early 50's, and now that my 4 kids are almost grown, I can now get away and have time for myself to do things I never could when they were little. Since my first parrot, I was married with 4 kids, since then, divorced, moved into a new house and acquired other birds, dogs, and cats. They all get along very well....but my life is very different now, and that was just the past 8 years. Although I LOVE & ADORE all my animals, especially my 3 parrots...I can NEVER get away...I have no one who can handle them. MY daughter could, but she has since moved out of state so she is not available to help me. MY sons who live at home can't handle them and have no desire to. IN an emergency, I can leave my sons to feed them, but if I am gone, they can not leave their cages for days if I had to go that long.

Working full time, as much as I want to go out at night, maybe take a class, or go out on the weekends, I feel obligated to be home so my sweet birds can have outside cage time. When I do get home from work, they are immediately let out....if I have to go anywhere or even to bed, it is a time consuming task to feed all the animals, let the dogs out, and put my birds to bed....no more just heading up to bed without caring for them all.

 

Of course there is no way to predict your future at such a young age, or even at my age.....but there are moments that as I am older, I realize how easy it would be to have no animals..but having said that...I would not experience the joy, love and fun I get from my parrots. Just something to be aware of as you venture on a life changing decision.

 

I will say, I have an amazon, and she is very bonded to me, she will attack anyone who comes into my house, so I have to cage her when I have company, or when my kids have friends over. If your grey doesn't end up liking your GF to be, or even ur wife to be.....that will be a difficult situation...there are no promises I am right or wrong on that.....it's all about commitment on your part understanding that this is a life long commitment....one not to be taken lightly as I see you are not..

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

FrightyDog... First, let me say, you have the personality of being an amazing parent to an African Grey. Your age doesn't concern me, as Sophie has loved my kids since the beginning, and while they are now 21 and 24, she has an amazing relationship with both, even though she sees Ryan twice a year. When she sees Ryan, she will knock anyone down, to get to him!LOL!

Take time to finish your degree, have a home and job to establish routine.( they thrive with routine!) I know you would want to have a Grey, ready to provide them with an optimal life experience. That experience, does require you being " grounded", being ready to be the great protector us parents are. While Sophie LOVES my kids to death...( at times her affection is ONLY directed to them, and I am put on the back burner), I keep her safe, healthy and fed. I deal with all the negative aspects of owning a grey. THAT is okay....because I have an AMAZING bird. My point is, you can get that Grey in the future, when you can provide him or her, with the " optimal" chance for success! Nancy

[Mistyparrot]

OH, TO BE 19 YRS OLD AGAIN:rolleyes:. Those were the days. So many women, never knowing what exciting surprises was around the corner with those girls, no online dating, No HIV, the best weed, disco dancing, muscle cars, Woodstock. Yes, yes, those were the days my friend. Oh well, just memories will have to do now.........QUOTE]

 

Wow you remembered all that?? I guess you were careful with the weed

 

Steve n Misty

Edited April 14, 2015 by Mistyparrot

[bluedawg]

I would only suggest that you adopt as there are so many that are in need of good forever homes.

[Inara]

OH, TO BE 19 YRS OLD AGAIN:rolleyes:. Those were the days. So many women, never knowing what exciting surprises was around the corner with those girls, no online dating, No HIV, the best weed, disco dancing, muscle cars, Woodstock. Yes, yes, those were the days my friend. Oh well, just memories will have to do now.

 

http://www.greyforums.net/forums/showthread.php?200425-The-african-grey-have-i-done-my-homework

 

Thanks for the free trip, Dave. Loved those years, and it amazes me how I can remember the words to songs from those days and can't remember my own damn phone number half the time. I agree with Steve and Misty, you must have been careful with the weed.

 

FrightyDog, my first bird, Elliot, a wild caught Amazon came to me near your age. I had a 2 year old (I was in the erm.. teenage love gifted and talented program) a dog, was working full time to support all of us, and was busy as all get out. My 'zon lived full time in a huge tree branch that I had cut down for him and shoved into a hole I had cut into an old coffee table. No cage, and was surrounded by people in and out, crashing in sleeping bags on my floor, football parties, basketball parties, poker parties, party parties, rock and roll. He had plucked himself nearly bald before I got him and wound up thriving in that environment -- king of the hill high atop his tree observing everyone and selling his soul for a bite of a taco flavored Dorito.

 

Fast forward a few years, to my wild caught CAG who was in such heinous shape when I got him that even my avian vet got choked up. *He* survived and then thrived with me working full time while going to school full time, then working full time and grad school full time writing my dissertation, teenaged boys in and out of the house, more parties (just a tiny bit more sophisticated than the ones with my 'zon -- these had wine with corks instead of twist offs) and stints of time when I was away on archeo-digs, and/or internships.

 

This is a teeeny synopsis. The stories of both are much longer and much more complex. My point is that each bird is different. While breeds share some commonalities, each bird is an individual and so much depends on you. Your attitude, your behaviors, your routine, your personality, your interactions with your bird. Because I was an unwed teenaged mom, completely on my own with no help, my life already had a ton of responsibility and a lot of my freedom was curtailed. So adding a bird into the mix wasn't a big deal. If I had it to do over again, I would do it all. After the eventual passing of each bird, I had a long gap without a parrot in the house. I knew what it was going to take to add another one into my life, and unlike when I was young and more impulsive, I waited until the time felt just right.

 

This time around, I rehomed a fabulous little 2 year old TAG, and I call her my midlife sports-model. She is little, she is sleek, and she did not arrive with a ton of dings, dents, scrapes and baggage. She had been well loved and well taken care of and to their credit her first people gave her up when she became more than they had bargained for. She is intrepid as all get out, demanding, loveable, crazy funny, wickedly smart, and well adjusted (other than *hating* it when I take the dog outside to pee and leave her inside.) I am retired now, and we have all day to chat. The thing is though, that just like with my kid and my other birds and dogs, we have a daily rhythm. Things are predictable not to the minute, but in a general sense. She gets lots of one on one time in the early mornings, and in the late evenings. She gets flight time every day. However, she is fantastic at amusing herself for long stretches as well as napping frequently during the day. That is the rhythm.

 

Each successive bird has been the love of my life at that time. Inara, however, is the ultimate love of my life, and will be the last bird of my life. I know what it is like to feel that deep overwhelming attachment, and to feel the deep overwhelming loss at their death. This makes her all the more precious to me. Love doesn't care how old you are. You get it. Here's the deal in a nutshell: read the link that Dave posted. Read the holy crap out of all of the sticky threads in this forum. Be choooooosey about your bird. No need to rush the process. There are so many Greys out in the world that can benefit from adoption, there will be as many if not more when you are ready for one. There are some reputable breeders out there, do your homework if that is what you are looking for; they will still have babies when you are ready. It's not about your age, it's about timing. It's not about *a* bird, it's about *the* bird.

 

Keep us posted. Parrots are like tattoos, they should be permanent so choose wisely.

[BaileysPapa]

Having spent over 45 years of my life rescuing, rehabilitating, and rehoming other peoples unwanted parrots, I was ready to give you a long story about the responsibility of these wonderful creatures. But, after reading all of these fabulous biographies of my colleagues here, I will just say, "Listen to them. They are telling you the real deal." I don't have to add anything, though I have a speech that I've repeated a thousand times to others, saying much the same things. I've seen so many unhappy and confused birds! As a side note to my Grey Forum friends, how cool is it that so many of us have come through the same sort of things, and arrived at this place together!?!

[FrightyDog]

Dear Lord what a response. Thank you thank you thanks. Unlike my aquarium forums (advice is only good from mods on there t-.-t), I feel I got a plethora of good advice. I read all of them and took it into consideration. I understand they like (for the most part) a certain rhythm and I pretty much have one, but it can change randomly and that's what scares me. I understand there are many adoptables out there (I am trying my best to organize a foster group for pets). I never considered one because I really hate the plucking of feathers, but if it really likes me when I meet it, I could consider it. That is something that I can not resist. But as all of you made very clear, I WILL wait (until the time is right). It won't be for a while, probably next summer at soonest. The money is quite a problem, but I will save Is there any other birds you suggest (like pigeon or parakeet)? Also when it comes to girlfriends, I will wait like i do the birds x) so if they don't like my animals I don't like them haha x).

Once more to summarize what I got out of it is;

Make sure I have time, make sure I choose the right one (not just get one), and make sure I can afford it x)

I say I will wait until next year at soonest is because I still live at home. Next year I move far far away (11 hour drive) and I have a very overbearing mama bear so I don't know how I will react to freedom. If I go crazy with the freedom(which who knows could happen) I know not to get one. So yeah thanks everyone I am very happy with these responses!

[Talon]

You are going to make an incredible parront when the time comes.....don't worry about a change....it's actually fine for a grey to have a change in schedules...keeps them guessing on occasion. You don't want to be so rigid that that can't handle a different schedule....that's my belief...my birds have a different sort of time schedule on the weekends...even during the week. There are times they can't come out of their cages in the am as I have to leave early...there may be an occasional time when they are in their cages for almost 2 days straight...and they do fine!

 

 

my suggestion is a cockatiel.....they are fun. The males sing and talk....we got a rescue...it hated me, but adored my daughter, so when she moves out, she took it with her and is giving her all the enjoyment she could ask for!

[SullysMom]

Hey! I'll just give you my opinion about my Grey and what I've learned! I brought mine home just under two years ago. My only knowledge was from owning a cockatiel (which was a family pet) long ago as well as advice I learned online! But you really never know what it's like to have an African Grey until you have one! The best way to describe Sully, my grey, is like having a toddler....forever! He's messy, noisey, attention-seeking, and can be a little bugger a lot of the time! He follows me everywhere. Whether I'm in the bathroom or downstairs in the kitchen, he will climb down the stairs or march down the hall after me. If I'm home, he's out or with me. Sully shares my attention with three dogs and fours (and my husband lol). And that can be a struggle at times as Sully thinks Sully comes first! Finding a good vet is another thing I struggled with recently. So that is VERY important as not everyone has a aviary veterinarian close by! Like the others have mentioned, owning an african grey is a HUGE commitment. Not only because of how much attention they require, but costs (vet, food, toys, etc) and their life expectancy as well! They are emotional creatures with a ton of character that require a loving, committed life-companion. Good luck with whatever you choose!

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

FrightyDog.... Now, do what I tell my two boys in college.... GO GET SMART! Nancy and Sophie