katana600

Watching your posts as you eagerly awaited the best timing to bring Gracie home has been a joy in my life. She is healthy, happy, well-adjusted and you have been an inspiration in the way you have embraced the forum reading, learning and contributing. My best wishes for you and Gracie and your family to have decades of companionship and many many laughs together. Congratulations on your homecoming. What a lovely tribute to your dedication. Thanks for sharing your journey with us.

There are a few things that have been so helpful. One big thing has been the lime drink. I have given him sips of my water and offered him bits of food but nothing has resonated like the happy gurgling of sipping the limeade. I would never have thought of this myself. Well, for one thing, I hadn't tried it myself. LOL. I don't give it to him often, but the look of joy when he just laps it up is sublime, he doesn't sip more than a tablespoon and generally wants more. It is the one thing I read here that has been his new currency. Another thing I read from someone is that at 8-10 years of age, he is still essentially a juvenile. That would not have crossed my mind, I tend to think of him as a little ole curmudgeon just wrapped so tightly and resistant to change. He is still a babe in the woods looking for a leader. I will try to get some pictures, I have tried taking a couple on my phone, but he comes out and gets close in the evening and the lighting isn't good in the room so it is hard to see him. I will see if I can remedy that. Thanks for the encouragement. It has never crossed my mind that he would someday be a healthy happy grey. That isn't something I have seen in my house even though we have had three greys here since I joined the forum. I guess I hadn't dared to dream but also I don't have the pressure of high expectations either. He does get really relaxed, and sit next to me and elicit a scratch and then for two hours we sit and do our dance. He approaches, gets a scratch, makes a happy sound and with his eyes closed in apparent bliss. Even while he is obviously relaxed and enjoying it, he will make a sudden swipe. What is different is how quickly he composes himself with a surprise wide-eyed look and a quick "oh sorry". He really seems to mean it. It is hard to explain, he swings around and if he connected, it would be a hard nip, but I don't pull away, just move to show him I got the message. He doesn't come after me, but we both just "stand down" for the moment. He composes himself and then presses for another try. He is keeping me way up past my bedtime, but if that is his best time, I will adjust. We both fell asleep tonight and that just seems right. I will love him as he is without any expectation of change, but if he does grow and change, that would be more than okay. Thanks again for sharing something that just seems monumental and extraordinary.

Thank you, last night did seem like our very own Christmas miracle. As I was closing things down for the night feeling so warm and happy, Gilbert clamored to the perch on his door and tucked his head. As I started to reach up to scratch his head, instead he moved quickly and lifted his foot to step up. That kind of offer was too much temptation to pass up for me because he is generally reluctant to leave his safety zone. I brought him back to the sofa and I sat back down to read a book. Soon he was soliciting scratches and nudging me again for interaction. As I grew more sleepy, I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. It was bliss for me to just sit quietly and feel his warmth just near the side of my head. He started to explore and pulled at my glasses, so I took them off. Then he did the strangest, scariest thing. He started "feeling" my face with the arc of his beak, quickly doing that flicking right-left tapping over my entire face. It was something like I might imagine a blind man doing to "read" a face. I stayed there quietly and allowed him to continue and then he just fluffed up, tucked his head under a wing and promptly fell asleep. I held very still and allowed him just the quietness of a connection that we had not enjoyed until those moments. Every grey companion on this forum has helped us reach this point. Your descriptions of your own stories, your continued encouragement and your understanding of your own grey has given me insight to let my heart lead the way to Gilbert's trust.

Your husband is such a good sport. His pillow technique is ingenious and shows how much he effort he is willing to invest in Marcus and a tribute to you as well. There is no doubt a celebration party at your house will ensue when Marcus suddenly decides to step up for Daddy.

Until today I had never seen a photo of an Amazon displaying his beauty in flight. Louie is a complex and wonderful companion, much more than just a pretty face, but goodness what a pretty parrot, he is a work of art.

That video made me laugh out loud. She is just precious. Thanks, and a Merry Christmas right back to Sunny and her flock!

I am always watching with great interest the descriptions of life with Amazons. I will likely hold myself to keeping two parrots. Gilbert is a handful. Never say never, but for now, I live vicariously through the lives of your Amazons.

We have been rolling right along with the dance of the rehomed grey, one step forward, half a step back and no bites in a really long time. Yesterday a dear friend from long ago was visiting our home. She was wondering how we could know anything about Gilbert if he was in several homes. I explained that each home passed a small part of his previous home and he calls out for a former friend "Jim" often. I also pointed out that in the back of his cage is a leather toy that Sarah told me was the only thing he has from his very first home. He will play with it occasionally, but hasn't touched it in a couple of months. An hour after we spoke about it, is was as though he was listening and was reminded. He has been playing with it non-stop since then. Their communication with us is subtle, sometimes they can tell us what they want, sometimes we just watch and figure it out. We have also had many breakthroughs thanks to the tip of sharing a little sip of natural limeade. I put a red fleece blanket on the back of the sofa and Gilbert gets excited, steps up willinging and comes and sits about one cushion away but every night he has been getting more interested. Tonight, I was reading the forum and heard a soft little voice in my ear "Hey". He had sidled up to me and initiated a contact. I rubbed his head and gave him a scratch and went back to reading. Over and over again, he said "Hey" and soon, if I didn't stop immediately, he would nudge the side of my head with another "Hey". He stayed there for more than an hour and even though the dogs were getting up and down on my lap, he never acted skittish or nervous, he didn't grasp his chest feathers anxiously as he would usually do when he is touched. It makes all the difference in the world that he is the one to ask for a scratch and it was so sweet that he did it over and over again. I stopped on a positive note and offered him to go back and he was ready and willing. He was so warm and gentle just inches from my head we were both relaxed and grateful for the contact.

I have been looking at a vitamix and know I don't want all those pieces to clutter my countertop and cabinet space is at a premium. I have read reviews comparing the big Ninja but didn't even realize there was this little beauty as an alternative. What is better than an informercial is to come looking and find your testamonial on just what I never knew I needed. LOL. Thanks for the heads up.

What a funny guy, keeping secrets. These birds are always listening. Its always the quiet ones that leave us wondering what they are up to.

The greys that have come into our lives after they have had many changes in theirs are a little more complicated than those that learned alongside the people they loved and trusted as babies. It is interesting to watch those long months of patience and waiting for Roscoe, Phenix, Marcus, Gilbert and the other rehomed birds pay off as they respond to us as while they learn to be trusting birds. We watch for signs they are seeking out the attention we all so desperately wanted to give them on the first day. I think the key is to be predictable and understanding that they need a different amount of space and a very sensitive approach. As soon as they realize you won't push them too far, they start needing less space and less time to recover when they get too jumpy or snap out when startled. The games we play from a little distance where they can see us will eventually win them over until they want to play too. I love the idea of the game of trouble. Great ideas and encouragement folks! Thanks.

I have been unusually resistant this year to the holiday cheer. LOL. I have not shopped, not decorated and better get a wiggle on or I will not be ready to travel in a week! EEEK. LOL. I do look forward to seeing family and friends. We are taking two dogs, two parrots and two young adults along for two thousand miles in one car. If I think too much about it, I will chew off all my feathers. Oops, too late, I am featherless. On the bright side, I can hope for snow in the frozen Pennsylvania and New York State snow belt. I can only imagine Gilbert and Java seeing snow for the first time. Thanks for the reminder that Christmas is coming Ray, I have had my blinders on and probably wouldn't have taken them off and found my good cheer without you. Hope everyone on the forum has love and warmth in this season and hope your biggest troubles are keeping up with your flock.

I know nothing about cockatoos other than their beauty and a reputation for being velcro birds with big indoor voices. LOL. I was afraid to chime in because we have a rescue bird who was offered "with issues" that were straightforward and honestly explained. The day he came home, I knew it would be a long haul. It has been a thousand times better than I could have imagined and I had very sparse grey experience to begin with. So, since you have already had experience, you know what you are getting into with the general aspect. I believe you really are getting a Christmas miracle. Barnaby is going to have the biggest miracle of all though. You know the areas where you will have to focus first so you are already half-way to solving those things. The biggest thing I can see in this match is that you are choosing with your brain at the same time as you have already made the decision with your heart. It would be hard enough to be a step child... but to be the object of infatuation of the ex wife is lower on the totem pole and practically screams baggage. The day he comes to your home and sees love and acceptance instead of hard looks and negativity, he will show you his issues were their issues. It will take a lot of work on your part to win him over, but really, that part sounds like it is already a well greased slide.

It is so good to catch up with your update. I attribute Missy's fight instead flight to be a girl with attitude and I love that fiesty side of her. Of course it isn't my finger getting savaged. LOL. You and your family are clearly loving the whole gamut of parrot experience. Kate is a wise woman to allow you to work things through with Missy and be on the support team until the biting is no longer a regular occurance. That is the stance my husband takes as well. It does warm my heart though that months in, Gilbert is allowing a head scratch on occasion from David. You and Missy are a perfect match. It is wonderful to hear how she is adaptive and taking the new things in her life in stride. There are many days when I sit quietly and think about Murphy. I think there is a reason that Missy found her way to you because of who you are and your life experience with Murphy. I also believe in those quiet moments that Murphy found a space to fill in someone else's life and he is living the life of a king with someone doting on his every antic. He is who he is from your love and care and I know he is in good hands. There will be a day when the mystery is revealed, I will be tuned in to hear about it from you.

Loved your update. Your "french fry" is our "cracker". Gilbert also says "want some". That is so interesting. I try to give him a real cracker when he says cracker, he likes the little cinnamon goldfish or toddler tidbits. I also name things like almonds, beans or whatever as I give it to him, hoping desperately that he will ultimately request specific things. The closest we have come is for him to ask "wanna treat?" after he hears me ask the dogs if they want a treat after they come in from outdoor business. Marcus and his squash gives me hope. You better believe they are listening keenly when we are on the phone. Any activity not directly related to them is highly scrutinized, and often frowned upon at our house. LOL. Glad to hear from you, I love your updates. Marcus is quite the character. It makes me smile every time I read about how involved you and your husband remain with all your flock.

I love all these posts, great thread. You are so right Gwen that it is all the little baby steps that you have done to build trust with Roscoe that has permitted him to overcome the great fear and distrust he built up over the long haul before coming to your home. Gilbert has been discovering the back of the sofa this week. He fluctuates between wanting to scurry back to his cage, but is conflicted because he loves to have a little scratch on his head and neck. He does the same thing with holding onto his fleece blanket for security while he starts out being really tense and stiff. Soon though, his raggedy little tail feathers are up in the air and his head, neck and chest are snuggled into the cushion while he enjoys a gentle massage and some preening gestures from me. He also does that beak tapping when I offer him an almond. He will touch it with his beak and tip his head back and forth to touch the right side, then left of his beak against the almond while making a sort of human infant sound. I also thought of the episode on Everybody Loves Raymond and the chin tapping thing! That is so funny. I had no idea all these things were so common with our greys.

I can relate to your frustration, but with our first parrot, Java. She is the one to fly through the house screeching like a banshee when it is bed time. Fortunately she grew out of that. She is five now. We have a routine, I turn off certain lights and progress until I get to the last lamp by their cages. This is when I spend some time with her, then give her an almond and take Gilbert out for his close time and night night snuggle. He can hardly wait to clamor into the cage to get an almond. The only time I give them food is inside their cages so it has become their habit to hurry in to get their treats. I was lucky when Gilbert came to us that he already was set in his ways. He prefers to go to bed right around eight pm and asks "Ready to go night night?" and regales us with "Sweet Dreams". He has been a huge help in training Java. I hope your new routine with Hannah Bo gets better and better to make it more pleasant as you part company for the night.

Our rehomed TAG Gilbert is somewhere near 7 ten years old. He has been with us about eight months. He came in sweet, would step up, let me scratch his head for a few weeks. Then, as anticipated, the honeymoon was over. He has days where he feels confident and wants to be close and days when he trembles and shakes when I stand next to him to talk to him. The good news is that we have learned his body language and can more accurately predict when he is approachable and when he just wants to be left alone. You will learn the ebb and flow of his moods and eventually he will trust you and you will have a bond. There are some days when Gilbert will just tuck his head and let me scratch his head and neck. He is having a learning curve at the same time you are, so there are bound to be misunderstandings and wariness on both parts. It sounds like you are doing fine with him though if he will accept treats from your hand. Keep doing what you are doing, be calm, be patient and the reward will be beyond your wildest dreams. Bless you for taking on a bit of a challenge and caring about making friends with him.

When Gilbert is finally airborne, I will definitely need to put an iPad on my wish list. I guard my laptop very carefully. Java was our little destructo. I still use my damaged laptop in the sewing room where it is too dangerous for the birds to fly freely. Every time I press the left shift key, I get a little reminder of the need to be watchful. I caught her every time she pulled off a key... until that one and she chewed off the rubber boot underneath as well. I get a tiny piercing jolt and think to myself... I need to find a key to replace that one. LOL. I love the idea that we could have a touch screen and teach our greys to use Skype and other aps.

I know it is a lot of changes all at once for you and that it is challenging, but you will not regret the things you are doing and the effort you are making to give Buddy a safe and loving home. We have run the gamut of emotions from getting a baby and losing him, to rehoming an older TAG, Gilbert. I have to admit, bringing a little stranger in the house with a very sharp beak and his own set of expectations (not all of them good) has been a rewarding and delightful journey. I love that you have such reaffirming tokens of his life with your brother. Once you get past the learning curve, it is going to be a lot less worry and a lot more laughs for you. Thank you for being the kind of person to welcome Buddy home. Thanks for sharing with us. I love his picture. Our guy is "ragtag" and tattered. He wasn't clipped but hasn't flown in years, we are seeing signs of flight and it is going to be wonderful when he can choose to come to us on his terms. We have had eight months to make our adjustment. The dish detergent is not likely to be an issue, we use our dishwasher and I haven't read or heard of anyone having an issue with this. We don't use any candles or especially not Fabreeze but I am learning that a clean oven isn't one of my priorities lately. Who knew? It still cooks just fine, LOL. I love my stainless steel cookware and my steam mop and hand held steamer. Nothing is quite as uplifting as hearing Gilbert coaxing me to get up just a little earlier every day because I see that as a sign he enjoys my company even though he might take a bite out of me on occasion. Good luck on your journey with Buddy and thanks again for joining us.

Welcome back! I am so sorry that you have endured the excruciating loss of your first baby. We went through the loss of two brothers and the necropsy and waiting and it was traumatic and devastating. It is good for you to come back and to know yourself well enough to move forward and understand the joy of sharing your life with another grey. We rehomed a TAG and even though we have a struggle sometimes to gain his trust, it is well worth the effort. Since it is only three weeks before you leave for your vacation, I am of similar thinking to the other opinions so far that if he is in good hands now and is adjusted to his environment, it is likely to be in his best interests and yours to keep him there rather than bring him home and then put him in another place for boarding. Maybe you could visit him often in the next three weeks and then bring him home fresh when you return from vacation. I know if it were me, making the decision to try again, I would be excited and want to bring him home right now. But then, I would likely spoil my own vacation by worrying and wishing I was home with him. It would be a tough decision either way. You will get it sorted and it will just be a little bump in the road. Once you are home again and are enjoying your little one, it will all be behind you and you will be sharing a lifetime with him. What are you thinking to name him?

You have had a lot of changes going on in your life. I am so happy to hear that Zak is so well adjusted and that is a tribute to your hard work and consistency with him. Forum posts can wait while you make necessary changes that are for your future, but it sure was nice to see pictures and hear from you again. Isn't it wonderful to have Zak in your life and to have such a loving relationship with him? He is beautiful and you deserve accolades for the giving him your best during trying times. It is a positive affirmation of your love and devotion to him and a gift you give to yourself. Those moments when you relax and give him your full attention are what keeps your bond strong. Kudos!

Gilbert is our TAG, rehomed, with us for about eight months now. He goes from being sweet, asking to step up from the top of his cage door, to being so aggressive that he tries to bite my fingers when I open a food door to change his food or water as if I am invading and stealing all his food. I found it helped tremedously to put a rope perch in an arch on his door. It is as close to the top of the door, on the inside, as I can get it and still close the door while he is standing on it. If he comes out on this perch he is usually showing me he is ready to have interaction. If he is hunched up on an inner perch, he is either resting or "in a mood". Nine times out of ten, he will perch on the door rope, take an almond from anyone in the family and is generally in a receptive stance. Also, as you noticed, when our birds are on the floor, the instinct to get higher over rides the instinct not to trust a helping hand. When thunder or any other unexpected noise startles Gilbert and he goes to the floor, we certainly take advantage of this to build a trusting moment, but I think if he associated being chased off his safe spot with a rescue from the floor, he is so intelligent that it would work against us. We are still working to earn trust and are still learning the ways of Gilbert. You will get there with Grim, slow and steady. Every hard earned advancement is sure to be a cause for celebration.

Our Thanksgiving included visits from our girls and their pets. We had a kitten, a full grown cat, and an extra dog visiting. At one point my daughter was on the sofa, she had all the dogs and one cat snuggled under a quilt together. When I said "Awww, look at you with your little zoo" Gilbert responded with "Oh Lord". He couldn't have used a more disdainful tone if he had given us the raspberries. He also has taken to making an abrasive "Haw haw haw haw" mocking laugh when we are all talking and laughing. It always brings everyone around to laughing and giving him more attention which is exactly his point.