katana600

Of course you are not a bad person. It takes time and trial and error to understand your needs and balance those with Neytiri's. It is understandable that you would take the advice of her caretakers and when she gets home and you get to know her better you will sort things out without such guilt and angst. Be kind to yourself. Every family and every individual has to come to terms with this kind of decision. You are going to be an excellent mama.

Here we are in the dog days of summer in the southern US. Apparently we have been paying way too much attention to parrots and vet visits. Our little black and tan mini dachshund Mick was crying for attention at five am and he is a playful stoic little guy. After I took him outside and put him back to bed, he was crying again and it is just not his character. A couple of hours later he was favoring one leg and crying out. We made an emergency visit to the vet and they are treating him for a herniated disk. He is on complete bed rest and meds for a week. After all the horror stories and paperwork and prep for what to watch for to take him in for emergency surgery if he gets any worse and how this is common for his breed in middle age, the good news is that 95% of the time this should get better on its own. He is only three years old, but yep, that is middle aged for his breed. I let my husband go to the counter to pay, I have had so many surprises in the past couple of weeks, I took the easy way out. As we got in the car, I didn't ask how much. But, he took the initiative and let out a long breath and sat still for a second and said, these vet bills in the past three weeks are hitting hard. Without skipping a beat, I said, "Yep. They have, but it is cheaper than therapy and the vet doesn't make you talk about your feelings." He laughed right out loud and agreed that except for worrying about our babies and having real serious stuff to keep our stomach in a knot, it could be a lot worse for him if I get that marriage counselling "bug" again.

As the Olympics are showing and all the world records are being challenged, I just noticed that Grey Forums set a record recently. I scrolled down looking for something and saw where it says most people online at the same time on the forum hit a record on July 12 of this year. We have a great forum and I really appreciate the admin, moderators and the creator of this community. I don't know anyone else with parrots, would not know where to begin getting the kind of information shared freely in here. You have all literally been a life line during sad times and a great source of inspiration and encouragement.

I keep coming back to take a look at your precious picture. It just is so sweet it brings tears to my eyes. You should check to see if there is some national contest for pet photos, this is a sure winner.

You guys are so funny. Ray, that is a good one, I will remember it. Can you imagine the guys at the paint counter if I bring them Gilbert? He might take a chunk out of the spectro and anyone standing near it. LOL. And Wingy, my husband likes the earth tones and I like vibrant contemporary colors. I compromise by using all the earth tones and leaving the windows uncovered to let the outdoors in and we have a beautiful wooded lot right up to the back door. Then, I use bright colors in my quilts but even that is a little overwhelming to my family. I am really getting into this modern quilt movement where it is improvisational but the quilt shops are still in the traditional soothing colors. Janet, I am glad I drew someone in with my provocative subject line, it is all I am seeing in the online news, apparently a lot of people love it and some don't. It would probably scare the beejeebers out of my husband to see a copy laying around, I may have to buy one just to play with his mind. LOL. Thanks for the great ideas and a little bit of fun.

I am glad you posted this Nancy, I was wondering what Sunny's weight range would be in and what percentage of her normal weight the 22 grams represent. When our greys were really sick and losing weight, our vet gave us some formula to mix up and give to them to help gain weight. They were definitely sick though, in intense treatment and in obvious need of rehabilitation. When you check Sunny's weight every morning after his first potty drop it will give you something better to go on. It is so scary to see a potential harm coming to our loved ones but if you make a recording every day and don't see a trend downward, it might be less of a crisis. If it doesn't start trending upward after a couple of weeks, maybe a call to the vet to ask about a supplemental formula feeding would help. I agree that without a history of his "normal" weight, he may just be a slightly smaller guy. Our vet is always checking the keel to see if it is prominent and they go in annually so he is familiar with their blood profiles and the "feel" so he can be sensitive to change. Good luck with Sunny, I know he is a big part of your heart.

Both of ours will get on and in the dog's crate every chance they have. For Gilbert being so attached to his own cage, I just had to chase him out of the dog's crate. We seldom have the dogs in there but they are not allowed to get in his house so it is only fair to keep him out of theirs. Nilah is such a hoot and all of your parrots are at ease on the floor which ours are mixed about that. When Java goes to the floor she is dang well up to no good and it usually involves terrorizing one of the four legged critters.

We have been using the rescue remedy provided by our vet for three weeks now. His vet suggested five drops in his water might help him and to give it a couple of weeks before we might recognize some improvement in his nervousness. On a subsequent visit with Java we discussed Gilbert and his rescue remedy and he said it is one of those things that isn't going to hurt him and I could give him more drops if I was wondering if he was drinking enough water for it to have an effect. I did start adding a couple of drops to his warm beans and since then I have noticed a remarkable change coming over him. He does seem to go through periods of sudden withdrawals and refusing to let me near his cage without getting upset. Sometimes he bites the bars and flings pellets and just gets agitated when I am near his cage. Other times, he will see me coming and will quickly skitter to his chosen "touching" perch. Lately I have been seeing him posture for a head scratch on every perch as I approach him. He is especially warm and friendly at bed time and has been talking in the dark. When he does that, I do get out of bed, turn the light on and give him a head rub for as long as he tolerates it. This usually means about thirty seconds. Lately he has been more accepting and I have also noticed he isn't shaking any more when we get close. This morning was exceptional. He not only allowed a five minute session, but he was falling asleep. Usually, he will hold tight to his lower chest feather with his beak and just shake and tremble even though he wants the contact. This time, he relaxed so much his head just kept getting lower and lower until it was on the perch even though he was clutching the bars with his foot. I thought he was going to relax so much he might fall right off the perch. Generally if he hears any kind of sound inside the house or even outside in the neighborhood he will spin around and snap at me. This time, David walked past us to take the dogs out and Gilbert was totally oblivious. The only time he startled and seemed a little nervous was when the upstairs air conditioner kicked on and one of the vents made an unusual whistling sound. He spun quickly but didn't try to bite me this time. He listened for a few seconds and then tucked his little head for more massaging. Usually he has a specific spot just on the crown of his head where I am permitted to just touch him and rub a little. This morning he was stretching and moving into my hand until I had all my fingers between the bars and was rubbing on his neck and head. It was so warm and he was so relaxed that I have to believe that the rescue remedy is having an effect on him. Since we are going on a road trip in a couple of weeks, I am going to continue using the drops and see if this makes a difference to him. So far even though I have been skeptical, I have to say I think it is encouraging to see he is letting down his guard and is definitely less nervous and hardly seems to tremble at all. One more thing. While he was relaxing this morning for his little massage, for the first time since I have had him, he was blushing. I saw this with Kopi and Juno when they were happy and excited to see me get up in the morning, but for Gilbert, this is a first!

You and Casper are getting along beautifully. I love your pictures. It seems that no matter how many African greys I have seen, each of them are unique and beautiful individually. I loved the black and white photo and then the ones in the jungle theme how his eye color is so close to the color of the blanket he is on. My daughter does something with the camera where she points it first at a colored object, then takes a photo and it will be completely black and white except the chosen color. I would love to see one of Casper if you can do that. Maybe with the blanket color for one and red for accentuating his tail feathers. Our rehomed guy still doesn't tolerate anything new and after 18 months he is still not ready to cooperate for any photo sessions.

I am constantly amazed at how tuned in you are with your flock. Also that you can do so much with them in such a short time. Gilbert still does not regularly allow me close enough to him to smell his breath and it is a real treat when he permits me to hold him but no way would I be able to flip him over. They are all blessed to have your care and attention. Did you have parrots before Oliver, Bubba and Bongo? I will be watching to see what the vet says about Bubba's crop.

Such a good question. When Java was new to us, her vet suggested taking the band off on her first visit. I was kind of taken aback. I thought it was a "rule" that they had to have them. Taking it off felt like I was going to get into trouble. Her vet assured me I wouldn't get arrested or anything and the band was giving Java some irritation. It felt a little like writing in a book, I know some people do it but man did it make me look over my shoulder when I was in college and highlighted my first book. It still doesn't seem right to me. LOL. I kept the band, but it makes me wonder why they still band parrots in the US. There doesn't seem to be a registry so it must just be a way of identifying them to the breeder for feeding, weight checks and general record keeping. If you think about it, banding them may help you identify them if they were lost and found, but since there is no registry it would be coincidental if they were taken to your vet who might have recorded your band number. I haven't even thought about that band again for years and now you have me wondering if Gilbert has one. I don't think so, but I am not going to turn on the light and wake him up to check.

No, not that book that seems to be on every media news feed, I haven't read it even. LOL. But, for a while I have been on a quilting quest. I started a new contemporary modern quilt for my daughter about a month ago. The inspiration fabric is black and white with little pops of bright lime green color. There is just a touch of grey in the background fabric and I have been experimenting with grey and white stripes for the filler strips. Over and over I have been looking online, foraging through all the quilt shops and it just seems like there is either no grey fabric or it is just not the right shades. Today while I was watching Gracie's video and noticing her color changes from an earlier segment, it finally hit me. The perfect shades of grey are our beautiful companions. From the time I brought Java home, I have been influenced in my quilting and home decorating by our greys. I tried painting a bathroom in shades of grey and could not get the "right" paint. This quilt is exactly the greys and the lime green is in Java's lower body, her "pantaloons". Now all I need to do is take Gilbert and Java to the fabric store and say "These are my shades of grey, where can I find them in your fabric?" Why did it take me so long to figure this out? Who knew Gracie would be the "artist's" muse? Thank you Gracie.

What a good chuckle you gave me today Ray. She has probably been coming and going at will while the old door was left open. Can you imagine how surprised she must have been when she finished checking out "her" house and discovered she couldn't get back out again. She was probably looking out the window trying to figure that new door out. The gig is up, now she will have to be more careful to get in and out without detection again.

I had to come back in to watch Gracie's video again. I've read that the reason greys can mimic human speech so well is that they have two sets of muscles that they use to control the air flow to make sounds. Gracie is already so motivated to talk that when she gets that muscle control I think she is going to expand her vocabulary exponentially. I found myself leaning closer and closer to her while I replayed her video. She is just beautiful. I watched a couple of her videos and noticed how the color on the top of her head has changed. She is gorgeous from head to toe, inside and out. I can see how you feel so lucky to have her. My thoughts were how lucky she is to be with you, she is a vibrant, engaging, confident girl.

Omigoodness what a wonderful homecoming for Maverick. It sounds like he has had a great start in life. You must be just tickled pink. I am glad you had snuggles and such a happy first night. Welcome home Maverick.

Welcome to the forum and congratulations on finding Shelly and bringing him into your home. My rehomed grey Gilbert is a Timneh and he is about ten years old. I had some experience with other parrots before bringing him home. I had some idea that it was going to be challenging but no idea just how long it would take for him to relax. We have had him with us almost eighteen months. Some greys will come into a new home and just thrive and some take more time, patience and understanding. I agree with others that taking it slow and easy is the best thing you can do. If you can approach his cage without him growling, you are doing fabulously well for a beginning. As you get to know him, you will learn to follow his lead and it may take a long time and a lot of patience. With that said, when you win his trust, it is better than winning a lottery. It is worth all the time and efforts. Reading forum posts, finding a common ground with someone who shares your approach and will guide you to finding your place in Shelly's life will be invaluable. Thank you for giving Shelly a chance and your love.

Gosh, your timing is a little like the empathetic and telepathic otherworldly grey mind. I was driving after getting supplies ready for our trip "back home" at the end of the month. My mind was on where I came from as I am not entirely thrilled to return. On one hand, there is the family I chose and married into and at the same time the one from which I escaped. Like Gilbert, I have come a long long way and had some trust issues but by the grace of God, I am better than okay. Gilbert can be unpredictable, seemingly ungrateful and sometimes breathtakingly scary. Even if he had been with me since he hatched, he may not be receptive to my touch. I accept that and give him my best while keeping reasonable expectations for how far we will advance. My goal is to keep him healthy, minimize the stress he has been under most of his life, encourage him to exercise and to find ways to help him learn to trust humans. Beyond that, if he someday decides to be friendly, that will be a bonus. Happiness is a relative term and I would love to be able to give him that too, but will settle for him being a companion in his own right and with his own expressive and wonderful way of being. It takes the willingness to look at the big picture and not to have a plan of action for him other than to make a commitment to care for him and hope he is able to continue toward his potential. I do love him and feel very lucky to have him in my life. It isn't the way I would have "written his script" but maybe this is meant to teach me something. I am keeping an open mind, open heart and open cage door.

The very fact that Burt has accepted you to the point of seeking out your attention has me cheering wildly from a great distance. LOL. Way to go Burt! The encouragement that gives me is profound. As you work with him you are showing him what is acceptable behavior and toning down the nips but still keeping him wanting more contact, even if it is not hands on. Or "beaks on" in his case. What an insight for those of us with rehomed parrots or babies. Thanks so much for sharing this.

That was thoroughly enjoyable even though I couldn't be sure what she is saying all the time, there were definitely some clear phrases like when she was barking and saying Barkley and when she was saying hey baby. Her eyes have not even changed color yet and she is remarkably chatty. When you answered her, I loved how she sat silently for a few seconds and I think that is when she is calibrating to your voice and words. Later when she said "hey baby" it sounded like your voice. Isn't it wonderful to be there with her from the beginning and make these videos so you can compare how she speaks as she is learning to when she becomes a right prolific chatterbox in the near future? There is no doubt she is a happy, relaxed companion and she loves you very much. Thanks for sharing this with us.

That picture is just precious, it makes me feel all warm and happy. I love the way the avatar is making it seem like Shadow is watching over them on your shoulder.

It could very well be that as the braces move teeth, it changes my speaking pattern. I have a little lisp and whistle thing going on so Gilbert could be reacting just to those changes. On the other hand, he is a volatile little character. Last night he was "owly" to Rachel and to David. He was grumpy to me too but later when I went to bed, he was giving me the "come hither" and "hey" talk out there in the dark. So, I turned the lights back on and came out to him and he was so sweet and wanted a head rub. I think we are dealing with the nature of a rehomed and suspicious grey and I will take what I can get. We are having some remarkable improvements in his confidence as he has been stepping off his cage willingly to get on the tall floor stand. Once he is on it, I can roll it close to my chair and he is spending hours away from his cage with lots of encouragement, coaxing and pine nuts. When it comes time to go back, he will climb off the floor stand and back onto his cage when he is darn good and ready. LOL. Every day now he will come off his cage willingly on his own accord and I am going to continue to encourage him and let him go at his own pace. We are so tickled with his willingness to interact even though it is on his terms. He is a work in progress and so am I. LOL. He is such a loveable little curmudgeon.

We have a rescue and sometimes it seems he is never going to forgive me for not being his first love. Now, he suddenly has become lovey with my daughter AND my husband and is intent to not only give me the cold shoulder but to actively seek opportunities to bite me. He goes through phases though and when it is good, he is really really good. Being grateful is never going to be a theme with him no matter who is doing his caretaking. I really don't mind because he has gone from plucking himself bloody to being more calm and graceful with every week that passes. The best thing I can do when Gilbert goes into a full on snit toward me is to ignore him. I speak to him lovingly when I go past his cage. I put treats for him in his dish when he isn't guarding it and I offer him a scratch or a step up and when he shows he is not interested, I just go about my day. I will admit, it gets to me sometimes too. I came in knowing he might never accept me, but watching him suddenly get all sweet with someone else does sting a little. Take your time, don't try too hard and bide your time, it will change. Gilbert took a swipe at both David and Rachel today. It is the nature of the beast, so to speak. We can love them through their transitions and just enjoy interactions that are not hands on when they give us that grace. Tango will likely come back to seeking your attention too.

You know, I had not really thought about the timing of his newfound love of Rachel. She has been in and out of our home during Gilbert's time with us. She was living away but would come stay for a week at a time or more when I traveled. Then in May she broke up with her fiance and cancelled the wedding about a week before the ceremony. She was distraught and it took a week or so to get back on her feet and since then, Gilbert just found a place for her in his heart. She just graduated from college so she has been staying with us, going to see friends and family, going away for job interviews and other things. All I know is Gilbert just has become smitten with her and I am watching everything she does and hoping to discover her secrets before she leaves at the end of this month for a start on her career. One thing we are working on is to get Gilbert off this cage more often. I moved a floor stand up close to his cage and he would step off the floor stand to get back to his cage. Twice now though, he left the cage to get on the stand! He is far less nervous and while I couldn't say he is outgoing, he is starting to become adventurous. He is willing to take food from any of the three of us. He has not intentionally responded to a step up from me since I got braces on my teeth. I don't force the issue. He will step up away from his cage but he has been stepping up every time Rachel will ask him and almost every time my husband asks. The lil toot. Strangely enough, I asked my orthodontist to use clear bands now instead of colored ones and he has been letting me get close. (Gilbert... not the orthodontist.) LOL.

You are ever so lucky to have found Coco. It looks like he has accepted you and you're off to a great start. It is wonderful to see that you are able to get close this quickly. Congratulations.

I agree with those that say there are worse things than having the cage door closed for a week. Time will pass quickly, Rita will be safe and I am guessing your sitter will get to know her better. She might even be encouraged to come visit Rita afterward and become close enough to let her out with your supervision and work up to a better experience every time.