Unsure of my future, Unsure if i should get a grey.

[tywaffles]

I'm fresh out of high school, and I am planning on adopting a grey from an associate, super sweet, but for personal reasons, they sadly can't care for him anymore, I am an experienced bird owner, finch, cockatoo, sun conure, duck, chicken, I have had em all, and I have no doubt I could take care of a grey in terms of attention on my current schedule, I am planning to do community college for 2 years, and I have a strong relationship with my parents, so they do not care if I stay there, BUT, after these 2 years are up, I have no idea where I am going with my life, not in the negative sense, but more in the, "Will I be moving 30 times in 4 years?" "Will the hours i work be short enough to give him the time he needs?" "What if I bring a girl home and he freaks out?" "What if I can never travel in my entire life?", I love that F-n bird, and I know the first 2 years of care would be fine, but I have no clue what the future holds. Anybody here go through similar situations? 

[Jayd]

I respect you for your concerns...Having a Grey is similar to having a child. They require the same amount of love and care, worry, and concern and emotions. A Grey is not a child but if you are comparing jobs and lifestyles, each are more similar than not.

A Parrot's Bill of Rights By Stewart Metz, M.D.   GET TO KNOW ABOUT PARROTS BEFORE YOU BRING ME HOME - I am not a domesticated pet like a dog or cat. I still have the spirit of the jungle in me. I have special needs which you may find it hard to fill. Please don't learn these too late for my well-being. And please don't acquire one of my cousins wild from the jungle—it will jeopardize his survival and well-being, and that won't be a party for you either! GIVE ME THE LARGEST HOME POSSIBLE - I am used to flying through rainforests or savannahs. I have given up this great gift for your pleasure. At the very least, give me enough room to flap my wings and exercise. And I need toys for my amusement and wood to chew—otherwise, I might confuse your Home with the forest and its trees. GIVE ME A NUTRITIOUS DIET - I need a wide variety of fresh and nutritious foods, even if they take time to prepare. I cannot survive on seeds alone. Take time to learn what my needs, and preferences, are. LET ME HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE - I am a gregarious flock animal—but I am not one of you. I need lots of socialization to learn how to act with you, and with my siblings. I also need to have adequate quality time with you every day—no matter what your schedule or other needs are. I am a living, feeling creature. Above all, I need to be able to have complete trust in you, and count on your predictability in looking after me—every day. LET ME BE CLEAN - I may like to drop food or even throw it, but I need meticulous cleanliness to be healthy. My skin itches without frequent showers, the barbs of my feathers won't seal if they become oily and, worst of all, I may become ill if my food or water is not always sanitary. I NEED MY OWN DOCTOR - You may not understand my physiology and therefore you may not recognize it early on when I get sick. And it may be too late when you do, because I hide my illnesses (remember what I said about my being an animal of the jungle, where there are lots of predators). And I need an avian vet—a specialist (no HMOs for me please). If you can't afford one, perhaps you shouldn't have taken me home. PLEASE DON'T PUNISH ME - Just as I don't always understand your peculiarities, you may not understand mine. I don't TRY to get in trouble—remember, a house is not the jungle. If I do screw up, don't yell at me and never hit me. I have sensitive ears and I may never trust you again if you strike me. Hands are sometimes scary things to us (why in the world would you not be zygodactylous like us?). Even more importantly, we don't learn by punishment. We are gentle creatures who only strike back to protect ourselves; we learn through patience and love. SPEAK MY " language" - I know you get upset with me when I knock over my water bowl, throw food, scream or pluck my feathers. I don't do these to annoy you—I am probably trying to tell you something (perhaps that I am hurting, lonely, or sad.). Learn to speak MY (body) language. Remember that I, alone of all creatures on this planet, learn to speak yours! SEE ME AS AN INDIVIDUAL - I am a unique and feeling being. No two of us are alike. Please don't be disappointed in me if I don't talk like you wanted, or can't do the tricks that your friend's parrot can do. But if you pay close attention to me (and I always empathize with you, whether you know it or not), I will show you a unique being who will give you so much more than talking and playing.. Give me a chance to show you who I am; I think you'll find the effort worth it. And remember—I am not an ornament;. I do not enhance ANY living room décor. And I am not a status symbol—if you use me as such, I might nip at your up-turned nose! SHARE YOUR LOVE WITH ME - Above all, please remember that you are my Special Person. I put all my trust and faith in you. We parrots are used to being monogamous.(no bar-hopping for us!).So please don't go away for long periods or give me away—that would be a sadness from which I may never recover. If that seems to be asking a lot, remember—you could have learned about my needs before bringing me home. Even having a baby or taking a new job isn't a fair reason—you made a commitment to me FIRST. And if you think that you must leave me because you might die, provide for me forever after you leave. I may live to a ripe old age but I can't provide for myself. Remember I'm in a small cage amongst people who are not of my blood. YOUR RIGHTS - You have lots of rights, but I can only assure one. And that is, if you treat me the way I described above, I will reward you with unwavering love, humor, knowledge, beauty, dedication -- and a sense of wonder and awe you haven't felt since you were a child. When you took me home, you became my Flock Leader, indeed, my entire universe – for life. I would hang the moon and stars for you if I could. We are one in Heart and Soul.     About the Author ... Dr. Stewart Metz is the Director of the Indonesian Parrot Project, a not-for-profit organization dedicated to wild Indonesian parrot conservation ... and educating pet owners on proper pet bird care and conservation of endangered birds.

 

 

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[neoow]

I brought Alfie home when I was 17 years old and still in school. Of course, as a teenager, I knew everything....  or so I thought....

I wasn't in a situation where I couldn't leave Alfie with family because they did not bond with him. They tried at first but they were wary of him and couldn't quite understand the differences between the family dog and cat to Alfie. (I mean absolutely no disrespect to my family here by the way- just telling it how it was). I was the single caregiver for Alfie. He started life living in my bedroom until I was able to move him downstairs in the lounge/dining room, safe in the knowledge that neither the cat or dog would bother him. My family would try and socialise with him often enough, but were too scared to handle him and would try and avoid him when he was out of the cage where possible. To this day, whilst my parents will look after him if I'm in a bind, he would always be in the cage and they wouldn't dare let him out if I wasn't there.

Life moved on, as it tends to do and I moved out into a rented house with two friends- neither of who wanted much to do with Alfie. The only place he could live was in the main hallway, so he saw a lot of foot traffic but not enough regular attention. He wasn't in the main room in the house. Again, things changed and my two housemates moved out, allowing me to move Alfie into the living room of the house. But I was studying as well as working full time and gaining more responsibilities at work, which meant longer hours. I didn't give him the attention he deserved or needed and I will be the first person to hold my hands up and say that I was failing him as an owner. In fact, when I first joined these forums, I had gone through the agonising process of trying to decide whether I should rehome Alfie. I had actually contacted a possible rescue organisation but (thankfully) they never returned my message.

Since then I decided that it was MY failings, not Alfie's and it would be unfair to turn his world upside down because of my mistakes. So I started making small changes here and there with a view of improving Alfie's lifestyle. A bigger cage, moving furniture around so I was in the same room as him more often. Making more time for him and working on fixing our relationship. When I was looking to buy a house I went in to each one with a view of where Alfie would fit in and making sure he would be the centre of attention in the house (which he now is). When I moved into my house I put Alfie in the centre of the lounge/diner and I put my desk next to his cage (I don't own a dining table to allow for this). This means that even if I'm working or drawing or playing games etc, I am with Alfie and he can come out and play or watch what I'm doing and get all of the attention he wants and needs.

The difference between my situation and yours is that it sounds like you have a family who will happily look after your flock if things do get a bit hectic. That option alone makes a big difference. So if you do decide to add a grey to your flock, I would strongly recommend making sure your family are on board and are involved with the bird as much as possible.