Gilbert is home

[Timbersmom]

That's great! When I saw Timber blushing I had to go to the internet to find out what that was and was so excited to see it was a good thing. Marvelous progress

[katana600]

You know how our greys are notorious for the reaction they have to change? As Rachel prepares to leave for a new job, we went out and had a girl's day yesterday. She got twelve inches of hair cut to a cute little bob. She had her nails painted red for the first time I have ever seen her do that. In the car on the way home she said "Oh no. What will Gilbert think? He might not love me any more. I guess that will be good because it won't be so hard when I move away then." She came right into the house braced for the worst. When she walked up to him in his cage, he ducked his head for a scratch and then stepped up for her. Who would have thought that he would be so nonchalant about it? Well there goes my theory that he is grumpy with me because of the braces. LOL. He is a man of mystery.

[Wingy]

If Rachel ever wore her hair up or in a pony tail Gilbert might just be accepting this as normal because he doesn't realize the hair is no longer there. Don't discount the idea that he is grumpy over your braces. Your braces could be reflecting light, causing your lips to move differently when you speak or even changing the way you form letters/sounds.

[Timbersmom]

After my experience with Timber and my headband the other night, I wouldn't discount anything. It amazes me how easily they are "disturbed" by seemingly minor changes. He also doesn't like my reading glasses. I have to take them off before I can pet him.

[katana600]

He is loving and accepting to her no matter what changes she makes. I think he picked up on her grief over her wedding being cancelled at the last minute and the process of moving on. She had come and gone from our home before that and he payed her little attention at all. When she moved back in, he has just gone out of his way to solicit her attention. He won't graciously step up for anyone else, but he has his little foot waving around to her from the time she gets out of bed until she finally comes down to give him some attention. Right in the beginning when he came here, he was like that for me, but I think you are right about the braces. He is standoffish but he still does let me give him a head scratch and get close to him. He will come from Rachel's hand to mine happily. He is always showing me something new. It has been the best medicine for Rachel that Gilbert has been giving her daily affirmations.

[Ray P]

There is no doubt in my mind about African Greys being able to read, understand and feel your emotions.

[katana600]

Our man of mystery will remain so for the next year unless he has a vet visit before his annual. I finally called the vet's office again to inquire about that DNA test in July. There was a mixup and his blood was not sent for DNA testing. I am not about to take him in for a blood draw just for that reason, so it will have to wait. His gender isn't going to change in the next year, so I will just embrace the mystery and enjoy him just the way he is. He continues to sing and give Rachel all his love. We are all going on an RV trip in less than a week, and then she is leaving for her first job. She is already expressing concern that Gilbert will miss her and is afraid he will be mad at her for leaving. I know that he will be my sidekick when I drive a U-Haul to Texas to take her furniture for her apartment, so he will still very much be a part of her life, even from a distance.

[Sarasota]

There was a mixup and his blood was not sent for DNA testing.

 

Drat that vet office! I guess we'll have to stay on pins and needles a bit longer.

[Timbersmom]

Unbelievable! Oh well, as you say, certainly not worth another trip and trauma.

[katana600]

It is as much my fault as theirs because I mentioned it when I made the appointment but then Java was sick and I was so worried about her and whether Gilbert had the same thing that the gender issue just fell under the radar. I called as soon as we got home and they said it was in the request. Then when I called, they told me the paperwork wasn't back and they would call when they received results. I think it is just a matter of who is working at the desk just made assumptions. I won't make that mistake again and it does open my eyes to the path of miscommunication so I will insist on speaking to the vet directly if we have any real health issues that I am not willing to get sidelined and will have this in my reserve to be more bold and not take advice from receptionists. She also miscommunicated when I said Java was looking out the window to Java flew into the window and when I heard her repeat that to the vet tech, I told her that was not the case but when the vet read the report it was still in there. I'm sure she is well-meaning but I have learned to take names and to be more selective. On Gilbert's part, after this much time if they told us we had a she instead of a he, not much would change. It would definitely be an issue if there was an egg binding issue, but I watch closely and would mention that he was not DNA tested male if he has any health issues. In fact, I do that anyway and that is why the DNA testing discussion came up. The vet is really good at handling all of our parrots, I have great faith in him, but will be a lot more wary and more difficult to handle with phone calls etc.

[katana600]

Our entire family and pets are going on a quick vacation. We have been preparing and packing and Gilbert seems excited to see the travel cages being set up. I undertook a huge project to make two quilts in one week and spent twelve hours today getting them finished. Wooo hoo. However, I exhausted myself and for the first time in a really long time, I took a rest on my bed late this afternoon. Gilbert's cage is in sight when my door is open and he was really vocal and carrying on. He knows something is up and was calling to get me to get up. For the first time, he gave me a "name". He said "Mom". I wasn't sure but soon he said "Mom, mom, hey mom". My kids each call me something different. Generally Rachel calls me "momma", and Kelsey calls me "mumsie" so I don't think he picked it up here. It really surprised me and even though I just wanted to cover my aching head, I had to get up to go see him and reassure him everything is okay. He loves to travel and we are going to rent an RV so it will be like home away from home. I've gotten him some new toys and lots of things to keep him busy.

[chezron]

Have a good trip!

[Timbersmom]

What great news that he called you "mom!" I was just telling the family after Timber said "Dakota" this weekend that Timber will probably never call me anything because he hears so few people call me anything. I'll be lucky to get a "hey you" Safe travels and blessings to you!

[CLB]

Relax and have fun!

[Ray P]

OK Dee its up to you to make sure that Gilbert has a relaxing and peaceful vacation with no stress, after all he did call you mom.

[katana600]

So, we drove from the Atlanta area to Jacksonville NC. We moved furniture from Wilmington to Jacksonville and then scrubbed down the old apartment and set up furniture in the new one. That was Monday driving 8 hours plus. Tuesday move, Wednesday clean. Thursday we picked up and RV, packed and set off about five pm. We stayed over in Richmond VA, then drove ten more hours to Pennsylvania the next day. We had some mechanical issues and spent the morning Saturday getting a new battery for the rental unit and then had a birthday dinner for David's mother turning 80. Sunday morning, we left at 6 am and drove back to Jacksonville and then eight more hours Monday to return home. Gilbert and Java were MUCH better travelers than I was and I not-so-gently admonished my husband and kids to not use the word vacation for what we did in such a short time. Gilbert was a real trouper. He was so funny the first night on the road. We stopped to let the dogs out at a rest area (when the RV broke down for the first time). The lights went out and he told us night night. Then when we got the thing started again, he was NOT happy about turning the lights back on. He kept saying "Night night Gilbert" until I covered him. Every day he was lovey and let Rachel and David scratch his head. He likes mom's home cooked meals and was not happy about his camper food. He would look at the food in his dish and ask me over and over for a cracker. LOL. He is so happy to be back home too. I love how both parrots adjust to a long trip.

[Timbersmom]

Glad the birds did so well, but that doesn't sound like a very "restful" vacation! Glad you are home safe and well though.

[katana600]

Gilbert had a restful and relaxing vacation and he made the most of it. One of the cutest things he does is that he remembers when we went away for four months last year about this time. He heard a commercial on television with a little pig squealing. Now when we mention any of the people from "back home" or in this case when we returned to see some of those people, he has a particularly endearing and funny way of squealing "wee weee wheee". He has continued saying it now that we are home again. He is also every so appreciative of his cooked breakfast. Every time we make a change with him and he doesn't get frustrated, scared or resort to barbering or plucking it seems like we have reached another plateau. He has been not only permitting closeness from my husband and daughter, but he actively solicits their attention and draws them in. It is good to be back home in a quiet predictable environment. I think Gilbert does better with the excitement than I do.

[katana600]

We had a couple of interesting new behaviors from Gilbert last night. There are three lights near his cage, one bulb blew so it made a different shadow pattern. Gilbert got up on his playtop toy hook last night and right in front of him was a huge shadow of himself. I was watching to see how he would react and thought it might scare him but he had an unexpected response. He lifted one wing and the shadow responded. He stretched and tried to touch it. Then he talked to it and postured and was really interested. He was mumbling and it seemed as if he knew it was his own shadow. It was three times as big as he is and David commented that Gilbert thought what a big guy he has grown into. Java was out on my shoulder and I walk past Gilbert's cage to hers a few feet away. He acted as if she was going to touch his shadow and become vibrantly active. He actually was sprinting and hopping across his cage trying to chase us away... or perhaps trying to get close enough to give us a bite. I am vigilant and aware that he will hurt her if he can and she can fly so I had a towel to put between them if she were inclined to actually fly to him for a battle. If I walked to one side of his cage, he would run over there and when we walked the other way he seemed almost gleeful to chase us. He was laughing and really enjoying the game. Now, I need to think through this to find a way to encourage him to be a little more active while still protecting Java. Also, I am more aware of his return to the big cage after a "vacation" and perhaps he is more protective and possessive of his turf. I don't want to encourage him to become cage aggressive, but at the same time to see him with a dose of courage is a new and exciting positive trend. It also tells me that since Rachel can ask him to step up from his cage and he is willing every time, I am taking advantage of that before her impending move to get Gilbert away from his cage and to an unfamiliar room where he is more willing to step from her hand to mine and to be out for a long time without being afraid or longing, leaning and asking to go back. It was the most endearing thing the way he was interacting with his shadow and overcoming his fears.

[Timbersmom]

Wow, I'm surprised he wasn't terrified of the shadow. Of course, their reactions often surprise me. Gilbert has came a long way from the fearful bird he was when you brought him home. Good going!

[katana600]

I also thought Gilbert would have been skittish and terrified of that huge shadow and contemplated turning off the light quick when I saw it. But he surprised me. By golly, today he has found his mojo. He is strutting around on his cage top and if I walk past he runs to try to bite me. He has been on rescue remedy for the weeks before and on our trip, but I discontinued it on Monday as we returned home. I am just going to allow this to play out a while and get a handle on what is going on with him. One thing is certain, when he sees me pay attention and snuggle and kiss Java it really irritates him. Her cage has been side by side with his since his arrival. He has not been like this before. She did fly to his cage top on that day when "something happened". There is a possibility that he made contact with her so fast we couldn't see it and she flew away quickly before she dropped from the shock. With that being a slight possibility I think for the time being, I am going to move her cage to a different room where each of them can see the living room but they can not see each other. I am also going to be sensitive to his feelings and take Java to a different room so if this is a jealousy issue, it is not exacerbated nor is he further agitated. She also has a play area to come down to my sewing room to have her freedom in a safe environment and he can have evening time all by himself with me later. The interesting thing is that if I walk past his cage to let the dogs out or to change out food and water to Java he runs quickly and tries to lean way out to bite me and he did even bite my shoulder when I thought I was well out of his reach. However, if I come up to his cage with a piece of pasta, a bite of my oatmeal or a sip of watered down limeade, he is all up on that and happily takes things from my fingers all on the cage top without bars between us. After that shoulder strike that left a nasty welt, I am a little more jumpy than usual though. I think his newfound mojo and that he is outgoing right now is a good sign that he is reaching a new phase and I will find a way to make that positive for all of us. He never for a moment gives me the chance to become complacent, but always trying to figure out what is going on in his little head. Well look at you go Gilbert the fierce.

[Timbersmom]

It just something new with them every day isn't it? God bless you for your patience!

[katana600]

To be honest, it doesn't take as much patience as you might think. When we brought in a baby bird, if they had grown up to treat me the way Gilbert does, it would have been heartbreaking and personal. Considering I had been on this forum for three years when I made the choice to bring home a bird with "issues", I wiped out my memory of all the great plans and funny sayings and things I was planning to teach my baby. I knew I was starting with a history, a past, and a trust issue that may never be overcome. I knew I wasn't going to get any appreciation or cooperation from my little guy for a long long time, maybe never. So it is all about a balance of expectations. If I don't expect a cuddle and then I don't get one, oh well, that is the name of the game. Hope does spring eternal, that is truth. I keep thinking that all I have to do is be open minded, quick to move if I am under seige and open to trying the same thing over and over again when it is calm and quiet and sweet to offer him a treat or to offer a step up. I do have to admit that when he runs quickly and attempts to bite me and Rachel speaks to him he bows his head for a scritch and then HE initiates a step up! He was just like this to her up until May and now he is smitten with her. Plus, he didn't like my husband for fifteen months and now they are best buddies. Rachel's theory is that neither of them touch his precious cage. They have never fed him, removed any dishes, changed any toys, nor cleaned his cage. For some reason he is ticked off with me and it is definitely to do with his cage. Right in the middle of a sustained attempt to bite me, while he is swaying and pinning and I step back, he has a transformation for Rachel. In the same moment, she will offer to hand him to me and he happily steps up, just a foot from his cage, just not off his cage directly to me. He let me carry him all over the house today. He sat on my lap and swilled limeade. He startled once and then made himself happy on the living room floor until he called out "hey" to me and took my offer of a step up. No sooner than I was a foot from his cage, he was trying to bite me. As soon as he had a foot on his perch he swayed and bobbed and grumbled. He flung his pellets and empty almond shells for five minutes after I moved away. He was a little terror with a temper. He grabbed the toys on his cage top and violently twisted and beat them. We let him get over it, Rachel went to him, scratched his head and he stepped right up, came out and put his foot right up to step up to me. I do not understand him but I will defend his right to have those feelings and work through them without taking it personally or having an expectation that he is going to suddenly change and be my baby. You know... come to think about it, I wonder if my husband has a forum somewhere where is saying exactly the same thing about living with me. hahahahahahaha

[Sarasota]

Yep. Sounds like a parrot to me.

 

Oddly enough, my 30+ year old parrot with issues is a lot more mellow than my 2 1/2 year old handraised boy. The youngster is a terror right now. Giving me tiny nips and yelling "Cuddle!" is his favorite game at the moment. He also loves to boss the dogs around. He's constantly yelling at one of my dogs, "Richard! Come on! Make a pottie!!" They have totally unique personalities, don't they?

[katana600]

You bet they are all unique. If you don't like their attitude, give them a minute and it will inexplicably change. I can think all I want about what I believe Gilbert is doing and darned if he isn't inclined to prove me wrong. WRONG. Nope, I am wrong. It is giving me lots of practice before my girls have kids of their own and tell me everything I did wrong from their perspective. Its coming. It is a rite of passage. The good news is, with parrots and kids, with time, it all revolves back around again and even for one day, I may be the love of his life, just for one day to keep me always wanting just a little more, just one more day. He is a corker.