Gilbert is home

[Timbersmom]

So good to hear from you and so glad Gilbert is doing well! I miss my Gilbert updates... So funny about the "quiet!" too. Sounds just like a grey!

[Luvparrots]

Happy to hear you are now home and that Gilbert has thrived during this visit. I have missed his updates. Welcome back!

[katana600]

I am a firm believer in the Rescue Remedy. We ran out of beans for about four days and I made him a mix of my own with similar ingredients. It all coincided with staying out of town for those few days that Gilbert plucked. He was not eating his bean substitute so those were days when he didn't ingest his rescue remedy. (I put the drops on his warm bean and grain mixture.) After things settled a bit, I also made a three day jaunt to Atlanta and back to have my braces repaired. I was really only gone two nights but he didn't pluck or get nervous when I was gone. I really think his plucking was more due to not getting rescue remedy rather than my absence. He was really happy and comfortable and way more outgoing at my sister's home. I was coming and going daily, leaving him alone for most of the day. He may have picked up on my stress during that time, but later when I was gone overnight every night for a week, he was not at all bothered and that was a more stressful time.

[Ray P]

Welcome back Dee

[katana600]

Gilbert has changed so much I had almost forgotten about how he would pull himself in tight and sit for hours and hours for nearly all of his first two years with us. Since we have returned home, I have the travel cage with the top opened where he can climb in and out of the big cage. He spent so much time in the travel cage, I didn't want to shock him from the small intimate enclosure back to the big cage. He has returned to the smaller cage many times even though it is on the floor. He has also climbed onto the floor and walked around, he has "flown" or glided off the top of the big cage into the living room suprising even himself. I think he is flapping wildly and getting "lift", at least that is what I am praying he is doing. I would so love to see him regain his flight. It is kind of funny when he does the flapping/running as he gets to the floor and he scuttles quickly under a chair where he regains his composure then he comes out to walk around on the floor. There was only one or two times he has done that before we took this long trip away. He is beginning to forgive David for his imagined transgressions and is speaking politely to him again. LOL. It is so good to be home again, we are all readjusting better than I could have hoped. I can hardly wait to see what the next year brings for out little guy. He may look tattered but he is beautiful and so well loved. I am realizing I needed him just a little more than he needed me and we are both looking forward to many happy years together.

[Wingy]

Just wait until he does the screaming flap but doesn't hold on tight enough and accidentally takes off. The look on their face when that happens is priceless.

[danmcq]

Welcome back Dee! It is refreshing to hear the updates (Though some sad) and how Gilbert has flourished through it all.

[katana600]

Thanks for the warm welcome back and all the condolences and caring thoughts for our family. Gilbert does seem to thrive on the variety and new horizons. He has not only become more outgoing to more people, he has been playing with toys consistently now. He has a sisal woven ball with tissues and treasures with which he has suddenly become consumed with curiosity to dismantle it. Since he had been out of his big cage such a long time, I rearranged his food dishes to a more convenient configuration and haven't gotten too much flack for that either. His activity level has grown exponentially and he is on the go most of the time now. He is getting a lot of exercise and doing a lot of flapping and stretching. He has been the center of attention and has many admirers from afar now. He is nearly a legend up there with his antics and vocabulary and now my sister is asking for visitation rights. LOL. I think she misses him more than she misses me. He really got close to her and was on his best behavior. It is heartwarming to see him open up to more people.

[Ray P]

It just took a little time and the right people.

[katana600]

I wish I could quantify the number of hours that I wondered if he was going to be okay, if we were the right family, if maybe he just didn't like us. I hung in and hung on and just continued to be myself, tried to find ways to reach him and let him know he was okay. It has been two very long years, but there are days now where I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I know there is a happy, energetic, captivating little bird in that tough exterior and I am determined to hang in there to see him come through. It was so easy to love the baby greys we had the great fortune to love for their short lives. It has been much harder to cope with Gilbert. The challenge of having him was something I didn't realize I needed and now I can't imagine living without him.

[katana600]

I am so happy to have all my attention on home and my little critters. Gilbert has changed so much for the better that I can hardly believe it myself. He continues to come off his cage. I thought he was being startled at first. Slowly I started to suspect he was flapping with his newfound freedom and some new flight feathers had come in that helped him to have "lift". I may be perenially optimistic but I think he could be returning to flight condition. Yesterday I heard the flapping of his wings and came to check on him and give him reassurance. Then, I returned around the corner to the kitchen. He gradually worked up the nerve to come out from under the chair with no offer of a lift up. He waddled to the kitchen to inquire "Whatter YOU doing?" I told him I was cleaning and he wanted no part of that. He didn't spend a lot of time exploring before he climbed back up on his cage. For months before we went away, I had been trying to get him to try this, and now, it seems like it was effortless. He also has been tearing apart some foraging toys and finding the few areas of his floor stand that hadn't yet been stripped completely of bark. After being in a smaller cage for an extended period, he is relishing his freedom. It has been the best of both worlds for us. While in a smaller cage, in a room away from most activity, he was extensively verbal, moreso than ever. He learned new words and he seemed to talk constantly. Now that he is home again, he is saying little, but he is more confident and outgoing and physically active. In time, I am certain it is all going to come together for him to be whole again. He is just a joy and an inspiration in my life. I am glad he is with me.

[danmcq]

Yesterday I heard the flapping of his wings and came to check on him and give him reassurance. Then, I returned around the corner to the kitchen. He gradually worked up the nerve to come out from under the chair with no offer of a lift up. He waddled to the kitchen to inquire "Whatter YOU doing?" I told him I was cleaning and he wanted no part of that. He didn't spend a lot of time exploring before he climbed back up on his cage.

 

This is HUGE progress Dee!!! You have worked and yearned for this for so long with no indication from Gilbert that he had even an Atom sized desire to have anything to do with you or the household. Your love and patience is paying off. You set a perfect example for all to follow if thinking about rescuing. You have demonstrated true unconditional love by being willing to truly just provide a loving and good home for a rescued grey direly in need of one. After all you have been through these years we have all known you on this forum. You, of all people deserve this ray of light and hope from Gilbert. I cannot express in words my happiness for you. Congrats!!! :)

[katana600]

A million thanks to you Dan and to all our friends who are rejoicing at Gilbert finding his mojo. We still have a little guy who is in limbo between being afraid and withdrawn and looking to reach out again for human contact. I am still in a concentrated cleaning mode, LOL. Gilbert got his turn today. When I set up his big cage after we got home, I put a "perch porch" on the inside of his door. Its a wire "ledge" if you will. His cage is so big and the food dishes are at two doors spaced quite a ways apart for him. I discovered I can put three bowls together on the door with the porch available for him to stand on while he eats. When the door is open, I have a puppy pad on the floor to catch spills and messes. He tried climbing into the water dish today and was happily splashing, so I took the opportunity to give him a misting with aloe juice. I spray him occasionally and he usually gets so traumatized, I feel bad about it. This time with his newfound confidence was different. He first seemed to tolerate a misting. Then he withdrew to the inside of his cage, but I continued to gently mist through the bars. Then he seemed to be trying to bite the mist kind of like a playful puppy. He went on to climb back out of the cage and lean way out toward me but it was an attempt to bite me. He wasn't as angry or persistent as he might get when he is in a mood, it was different, more like sparring with a friend. Oh, make no mistake, this friend would have battle scars if he could have gotten a hold of me, but we really just had our first REAL successful shower. He has been a little quiet since then as he got dried off and napped a little. But this time he wasn't frightened and traumatized. He was in there telling himself "Gilbert okay" and making some heart rending, mournful honking sounds. He is definitely making progress. He is better able to cope with change and stressful situations and able to self-soothe without resorting to self mutilation and plucking. After drying and resting a little, he is back out of the cage and enjoying himself again. What a relief to be able to give him a shower. I know he needs them and I have tried often without this kind of reaction, so phew.

[kittykittykitty]

What progress he has made because of your love and patience!

[katana600]

He also made progress in spite of my mistakes and uncertainty. I do love him unconditionally and I try real hard to be patient with him. It is so hard to know what to do and when to do it. My rule of thumb is to treat him with respect and try to encourage and entice him to come out of his shell. His rule of thumb has been if a thumb is within reach, take a chomp. LOL. He spent a day of sulking after his shower and today he has been a little more active. His floor stand is to the side of the television and he has been coming out and stretching to look around at the screen. Not only did we not have internet for my time away, we barely ever turned the television on either. He is very interested in it now. He has kept me smiling and laughing as he is so happy to be home and wandering about. It is the sweetest thing when he stops what he is doing, tucks his head and says "hey" as he invites me to scratch his head. Today when he did this, the door of his cage was open and his perch was only an inch from the opening. I was scratching his head through the bars as he requires when I thought I could move... just an inch, and be touching him without the bars in the way. NOPE! Hahaha, I am forever optimistic that the next time I try, he will be strong enough to embrace the next step.

[katana600]

We got a new puzzle/foraging toy for Gilbert and when I set it up this morning, he went right to it and pulled out some pistachios. When I tried to get a picture of him, he was not keen on being in a photograph in his little fuzzy underwear. What was really the best thing is how long he sat frightened of everything and now he went to a toy and successfully got a few treats out of it within an hour of it being set up on his cage. Then, instead of shaking and trembling when I approached to take his photo, he was "proactive" and afterward he even let me scratch his head... once he was back inside with bars protecting him from me, LOL. He's come a long way and he still has a lot of time to improve... or maybe I do.

[Timbersmom]

It is so rewarding when you finally hit on a toy/forage item they actually like! Nice going

[katana600]

I just love him! When he caught me taking the first picture, he spun right around and charged at me, then the next one, he was giving me an mmmmhmmm sound, like "wanna piece of this?" and then just warily watching me until I walked away. Then he went back to his toy and pulled and pushed the levers. It is just the greatest feeling in the world to find his confidence up enough to approach any toys, much less a new one. This one is a good size and being clear plastic, he can see the little treats inside which give him incentive to interact with it a little. I know he doesn't like the camera and generally resist the urge to get a photo, but this was one time I couldn't resist. It's hard to see his picture with the feathers chewed up again after so very carefully watching him as they grew in over a year or more. Oh well, he is still beautiful to me and I am grateful that it was a flurry of anxiety and then he calmed right down again when I came home to him. Also, even though he regressed a little when he was scared that I was gone from him and his routine was off a little, he gained a lot from seeing me come and go and was much better with me than he had been. He seems so aware that each time I do take him somewhere, I bring him back home and if I leave a little while, I come back. Over time, he has learned to weather the storm and settle down again more quickly.

[katana600]

Omigoodness. In the past few days Gilbert has been quiet for a full day, then has a flurry of new activity and trying new things... then withdrawn for a whole day. Recently he got on the floor, and when he was making his way back to his cage, he took a detour to where our small dogs were playing tug of war with a rope toy and climbed onto their bed within inches as though he might just join in. They generally ignore him, they never even looked up. Now today while I was just posting to the forum, he is on the move. He launched himself off the big cage and landed on the far side of the room. He was quick to want to climb back up the travel cage "bridge" or "basement apartment" in our Mouse Trap style living room playhouse. This time instead of going up, he went around the back and started to climb on a boing which I have attached on both ends to minimize the motion. For the first time, he was hanging upside down, gently swinging and I can just see how much his confidence is blossoming. One of the little dogs came to see if he was tossing them a treat when he was flinging wood bark from the floor stand. Gilbert stood his ground, gave him the "what for" and sent him back to his warm little doggy den in the corner. Gilbert then went on a reconnaissance mission. He made his way around the living room in a cautious but determined way and went under chairs, behind furniture and made a little mischief along the way. He found some boxes that I was gathering in different areas as I get things unpacked from our recent foray away from home. He chewed up the corners of boxes, he made messes on the floor and he is well on his way to becoming a "normal" parrot. LOL. I tried to get a couple of pictures, but the slightest change in what I was doing would interrupt his progress, so I am just being a quiet observer. This is one of the best days of my life. He IS finding his mojo. I can't stop smiling even though this new horizon means he is going to be more "high maintenance" from here on. I nearly forgot, last night I was on the phone with a friend until way past bed time. Gilbert started making siren sounds and telling me to go night night. Finally when I went to tuck him in, he unexpectedly stuck his little foot out and stepped up to me from inside his cage. I thought he was ducking his head to give me a bite and I nearly dropped him when I realized in the half darkness that he was jumping to get onto my hand. He is just full of surprises in recent days.

[Timbersmom]

Go Gilbert! Funny about the phone. Timber doesn't talk a lot when I am in the room, but almost every time I am on the phone when he is in the room, he starts yelling "Okay bye!" until I hang up.

[chelseaB]

Awww, this post made me smile just thinking how comfortable Gilbert must be feeling You have done such an amazing job with him Dee.

[katana600]

Yes, Karen, I have to go outside to talk on the phone between Gilbert chatting me up and hooting and whistling and exciting the dogs by asking if they want to go outside. Thanks Chelsea, I have been just smiling all day myself at Gilbert's new courage. As I have been working for a few days on a kitchen reorganization and deep clean, Gilbert can see me in the kitchen and he is relaxed and hanging out either on the floor near his cage or the very bottom of his floor stand. It is such a good feeling to know he is getting more comfortable. Where he used to tremble and hide and pull inside himself, he is now beginning to seek out little mini adventures. He is perching low and it is going to get just a little harder to keep an eye on him but its worth the progress.

[Greywings]

How wonderful Gilbert is living forward now instead of being stuck in his shell of fear, you and he have become a team to lead others out of darkness. Perhaps a book to share your learning to work at his comfort level and his learning to trust could help many birds and people. Gilbert is blessed and you are his angel even if as Willy says "flying too close to the ground" on occasion. Hey we are all human (mostly) and learning from little set backs and mistakes makes us al lthe better, I should know.

Edited May 15, 2013 by Greywings

[katana600]

Everything I learned about living with a grey and then about living with a "recovering" grey is from our forum members. I scarcely have the words to express my graditude to those who have gone before me and have shared their insights and suggestions to find ways to help Gilbert learn to cope. I had to google your "flying too close to the ground", I had never heard it. I think Gilbert is the one flying too close to the groung for now, he is my little angel. Angels come to us in all forms and the ones we are least likely to recognize have the most impact on our hearts. My book would have to be all the things not to do. I have learned that sometimes doing nothing, just living together and waiting, is the best thing. I never knew how hard it was to back off and not do anything and how what seems like going backward is really going forward with grey time.

[Greywings]

We are so fortunate to have each other to share with in order to help these damaged souls and perhaps prevent emotional damage to others. we live with four rehomed or rescued Greys and two Too's who came from other places, each has his or her own baggage some are easy and some will always have the scars to show. Each day is a blessing for me to share my life with their feathered (partial or entire)boisterous or quiet selves, they have enriched our lives.