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Moving.... might have to give up my smallest birds


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Yep, it's true :(


Turns out my mom will not hear of it (that being me bringing all my three fids)...

Of course, I'm heartbroken and absolutely devastated{Feel-bad-0002006A}

I don't have to move---but if I do the conditions for both me and Jacko (he's the only one I can bring with me) will be much better.

He'll have plenty of time out, a house all to himself (no dogs or anything) etc, a good healthy diet with lots of fresh veggies and fruits etc because there's a fruit/veggie store right across the street.

God... I swore I would never have to do this---I know and believe in my heart down the deepest core that birds are a lifetime commitment.

I also know deep down that this might be for the best---Jacko and the little ones do not get along and it's hard to juggle time for them all, there are significant stressors in terms of space.

I have a couple options...

-I can stay where I am and keep all my fids...but face signficant stress for all involved

-I can go, rehome the two smallest birds

-I can go and leave the smallest birds here (my younger brother adores them), so they're at least with familiar people and a familiar place plus I'll be visiting at least once a week so i'll be able to clean cages etc. There is also a possibility this way that in a couple years when I am on my feet and on my own I can take them back into my life.

Any thoughts? I'm just so tore up over this...

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What a decision to have to make.Myself, I would leave them with your brother. At least that way you can keep a check on them .Its a decision you must make alone,I am sure you will do what you think best for the birds.

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I think as shelia says its your decison and yours alone ,but im in agreement with shelia I think I would leave them with your brother as you say you can still visit and check and things might turnaround that some day you can have them back with you .Best wishes in your decison

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Well, you have some good options. But there's one that's a no no. Yes, leaving them with your brother is a good idea but your brother has to learn how to do the dirty work too. You shouldn't put yourself into the role of house keeper. They will live with him and deal with him on a permanent basis. He adores them but you never said anything about the feelings being mutual.


The biggest mistake you're making here is that stuff about taking them back in a few years. Parrots don't need to be confused. They develop loyalties and bonds with people who are taking care of them and suppling them with their needs and giving them a safe environment.


Switching birds back and forth isn't a good idea with any parrot small, medium, large or extra large. If the birds stay with your brother, he becomes the owner. Loads of people discuss first home, second home and third homes for parrots and it's the parrots that get confused and give out negative attitudes.


From home to home---bad idea.<br><br>Post edited by: Dave007, at: 2009/06/28 19:20

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In your place, since your brother loves these two fids I would leave them with him. He should care for them solely and you can check on him weekly to see how he is doing. You should give him a trial for say 3 months to see if he really wants to care for the birds and if not, you should re-home them if you cannot care for them at that time (perhaps by then your mom will have softened). Unless he agrees to return them to you, I believe you should leave them with your brother forever if he is a good caregiver. You can't just change your mind when it is convenient for you. What would you do if he hadn't agreed to care for them in the first place? I know this is a tough decision and you love our fids. Good luck on whatever you decide.

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You've received many good comments on your circumstances and choices. I think you have good options either way, but you need to do 2 things, whats good for you and whats good for the birds. Thus, it will be a win-win for both.

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Your brother may "adore" your birds but definitely does not sound like he takes care of them on a regular basis. 2nd matter is that - coming by "once a week" is not appropriate either. What are the small birds supposed to do in the meantime? Live in their filth? Are you aware of how unhealthy that is to both the birds and the humans living in the environment? Your birds deserve much better than that. What about those times when you become too busy or too ill or too...yadda yadda yadda to come by and clean up.


I believe that you should ask your brother if he wants the FULL responsibility of taking care of your birds and all that comes with it or find a person who willingly wants the responsibility.


You state that you "don't have to move" well.. I'm not sure that what your doing to the other birds is fair even if conditions for you and Jacko will be "much better" for the both of you. If you must move.. then find great homes for the other birds and do it responsibly and unselfishly.


I agree with what "Dave" mentions above - it is situations like this that causes so called "behaviour

problems" in our parrots and unfortunately they are also the ones who are penalized for the mistakes and actions of the people who are in charge of them.


I feel that I have no choice here but to be brutally direct. Remember that whatever creature you choose to bring in to your home .. it is a "life" and your actions have a huge impact on them.


Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/06/28 21:28


Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/06/28 21:31


Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/06/28 22:21<br><br>Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/06/29 00:50

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Is it not possible fot you to get a small place on Your own so that you can have your birds and you won't have to live by anyones rules but your own. If thats not an option then I would ask your brother if he wants the bird forever and the responsability that goes with it. I know its a hard thing todo but I don't see any alturnative Dave is right you can't shuffle the birds back and forth between homes its not fair to them Tyco had 3 homes before my home and she was only 4 yrs old when I got her its no wonder it took her so long to trust me she was waiting to see where she was going to next. I've had her for 2 years now and she will never have to be rehomed again until my passing and then my daughter will have her for the remainder of her life. You never know whats going to happen between now and then this may be her final home who knows. In some ways I hope that it is.

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It isn't possible for me to get a small place by myself as of yet as with the economic conditions I haven't been able to find a job yet... I wish I could because this could solve the whole mess.

I was such a mess when I posted the first time so of course my thinking is not rational and I'm sorry for my rambling... I know things are not fair for the small birds as well and I feel terrible. I have to let my mom know by the middle of August...

My brother is young and I know that he couldn't care for them all by himself but I guess I was hoping that the rest of the family who lives here could help him out.

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Okay, well...

I have decided to stay put if I cannot soften my mom's stance on only one bird...

All of you are right, and it wouldn't be fair or right for me to just ship them off or to come back in a couple years... they are living creatures and my responsibilities but of course the heart is never rational.

I'll let you know how things develop, hopefully I can both move and keep my fids

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