Cheshire Cat

I've always believed that animals know when you're upset. I was very upset the other morning when I had to wash Tui. I took her in the bathroom and as a lot of you are aware, she's been plucking. I sat down and started to cry because of it and she stopped in her tracks and looked right into my eyes and tilted her head as if to say, "What's wrong?" I know I shouldn't have cried in front of her with it involving her, but it was frustrating me as I didn't know what was happening with her. Sometimes animals seem to offer that comfort we all need, even though they can't physically say or do anything. But just seeing their eyes, makes you see they only mean well.

My mom has emphysema and has to have oxygen at night and sleeps downstairs as she's disabled. Right from the beginning we agreed I wouldn't keep a bird in the living room because of my mom and her chest. We kept cockatiels a few years ago and they'd make my mom cough all the time. This is why Tui is in my bedroom. I get the feathers and dust all over the place. But I love her and it doesn't matter to me about that. I think wing clipping is up to the owner in question. I know a majority of owners don't agree with it. Even the vet I visited yesterday said never to have Tui clipped and described it as, "You wouldn't cut a dogs legs off, would you?" I can understand where he's coming from, but it doesn't physically harm the bird unless the feathers are clipped too short. An air filter sounds like a great idea; you don't need to have your bird clipped and your husband is less irritated by the dust.

I will also pray for you! You have the support and hope of everyone here.

I have three young nieces (aged 5, 9 and 10), although obviously they don't live here but Tui seems alright with them. She lets them stroke her. I say she 'seems' alright with them as they've only seen her a few times because I haven't had my Tui all that long. I'm more cautious with Tui around my youngest niece, but the older two know how to behave around her and what to do/not to do. I'm sure if you raise your bird with your children around, they should all get used to one another.

Aww! Your bird is adorable. I wish you all the very best for you, your family and your bird.

I think it's ridiculous that someone as people have rightly said would leave a parrot UNATTENDED! Jeez. Have some people got no brain? It reminds me of Andrew who lost Tui; I was so upset over that and even my mom was. This is how I got my own bird's name, in dedication to Andrew's beloved bird. But from what I can see he was watching her the whole time and in his video, he cried about the incident. My heart went out to him. This person I don't feel sorry for. I'm glad the bird was found in the end, but it's the bird who went through the traumatic experience.

Well, Tui has her appointment at 9am in the morning so I'm hoping we get answers then. Thank you to everyone for your help and I'll definitely keep you posted on her progress.

To be honest I'm really not sure...Being a new comer to Greys myself, I'm also going through a learning process. I tried my best in my first response to explain how things may help. I hope I've been at least some help and you have luck with your Grey. I wish I could say more. It's a learning process for all of us. I'm still picking up new things about my bird as I go along. You could always try and play with him with a toy; that may take the emphasis off your hands/fingers.

I'm sorry if I came over a little strange when I said about the cuddling. I didn't mean to. Is there anyone else who interacts with your bird, or is it just you? I'm just curious here. For a while my bird wouldn't let me do much with her and was bonding more with my fiancee; thankfully, she seems more comfortable around me now. It's just greys behave differently with different people.

Personally, and this is just me, I would never have Tui clipped. I just see something cruel in it when birds are magnificent creatures and that's why they have wings - to fly! You'd be taking away that fundamental element which makes birds so beautiful, and it is afterall, every bird's right to fly.

I've only had my bird for about six weeks, but one thing I will say, greys aren't really 'cuddling' birds. Sometimes my bird, Tui, will take my fingers and grind at them. She's very attached to my fiancee and will do the same with his fingers which I think is more affectionate than anything. I know you said that it hurts your fingers - my bird bore down so hard on my finger once that it was numb for a while afterwards. They're just very curious animals. My Tui has only really just started coming onto my hands by herself when usually she wouldn't do this. Most of the time I just leave the cage door open and let her come and go as she pleases. It may be that you should sit down and talk to your bird, include him in your daily activities like eating breakfast, tidying up etc. Let him know you want to include him as part of your 'flock'. One point which I saw on a YouTube video about biting birds, although I don't know if your bird actually bites...show the bird the back of your hand when he goes to take your fingers; if you show the back of your hand, he can't get to your fingers. That may help. I'm only advising you on the six weeks experience I've had with Tui and also from the books I've read and videos I've watched. I'm sure in time your bird will come to sit on your hand and interact with you more. It takes time and patience. All the best.

I'm going through the exact same problem with my grey too, Kevin. I was also embarrassed to post here, too. I thought people would automatically assume I was neglecting my bird. I've been given lots of advice, but without a vet visit I don't think either of us will know what the exact problem is. All we can do is keep up the love and care and just hope the answers come soon.

The only thing which changed for her was that me and my fiancee brought her some new toys. One of which she destroyed (Lol!) and the second one we've taken out of the cage. I hope I'm not speaking too soon but she does seem to have stopped plucking and only preens herself. I'm sure Monday which bring us the answers we need.

The dreaded plucking began on Wednesday! I came home from going out and noticed a hell of a lot of feathers across Tui's cage. When I inspected her she'd plucked that much above her tail that she'd made herself bleed. I took her to the vet on the Thursday and they basically told me they're not specialists with birds so have recommended another vet to me and I'm seeing them on Monday as they couldn't fit me in this week. All I've been doing is worrying about my Tui. She's only about 6 months and is already plucking. She now started on her chest and yesterday I could have sat and cried at her when I held her on my hand. The vet I've already seen gave her some anti bacterial wash which I put on her twice daily to stop infections flaring up. Thankfully *fingers crossed* she's calmed down a little today, but still has a few patches which are quite red. I feel like I've done something wrong and failed her. All me and my fiancee have done is be there for her, love her and do everything in our power to make her happy, and now this has started. It's worse because she's so young. Could it be because of her molt and she's itchy? The vet said it *may* be behavioural, but at this age? And the plucking began so suddenly. It's not as though it's started and continued on for weeks. Her behaviour (apart from the plucking) is fine; she's eating and drinking, although she does seem a bit more clingy. This morning me and my fiancee had her in bed between us and she was purring as he stroked her. That's one thing which is different in her and she's more clingy. On Thursday afternoon I had her out in the living room while I was on the laptop and had her perch across the room from me. Every now and again she'd fly over and land on my head which is very unusual. Could the plucking be in some way related to her attachment to me and my fiancee? She has also started making a strange purring/gurgling noise when we are affectionate to her. Obviously she's enjoying this, but the noise only started today. I really am walking along blind at the moment as I just don't know what's causing this and it's worrying me so badly. On Wednesday night I was terrified to go to bed in case I woke up and she'd ripped her whole tail out. :( Every morning I hate waking up to see what I'll find. I've also written up a little schedule of when to wash her. I'm going to spray her twice a day and then apply some of the anti bacterial wash and shower her fully twice a week on Tuesday and Friday. We've (me and my fiancee) even tried to work out exact times to get her out and play with her to try and keep her to a proper schedule. She is also still preening herself. She's been doing this a fair bit the last few days and most times I turn around she's preening her tail or wings, so she's very conscious of her feathers at the moment.

I think she had a couple of dishevelled feathers on the middle two pictures...I can see one sticking up. Lol.

Here are some more pictures I took of Tui. I've had to take the net curtain down from my window as she's flown into it a couple of times and got stuck. Now she likes to sit on the edge of my window and look out. (Again, sorry about the poor quality. My phone is terrible with photos)

That's wonderful!!! I'm sure you'll have many happy times to come with him.

I am very sorry about the extremely poor quality of my pictures. So much for a BlackBerry phone which the two bigger ones were taken on. More will come though. My fiancee has pictures of her on his phone which I'll ask him to get onto the PC. But for now, say hello to Tui.

Oh, I know that Greys chew at everything. Tui even tries to chew at my gerbils' waterbottles. Haha. I said to her today that it's cheeky she does that. My gerbils don't come into her cage and bite her water bowls.

Thank you all for your help. I actually heard another word from Tui today. She said 'scratch'. That's because we always ask her if she wants a scratch when we stroke her.

Thank you so much for the kind words. She's actually sat looking out my window at the moment.

When my bird does something naughty, I just say 'No' in a very stern manner. Whether she understands this yet, I don't know. But when I say 'no' she will move back from me. I'd certainly never smack her or leave her in her cage as punishment. I say 'no' and then move on. I don't punish the poor girl.

Tui has gone to bite me a few times but now I show her the back of my hand so I can show her she's not so dominant and I won't back off. But she chewed on my finger once so hard that it was numb for about a week. LOL!! The end of my finger was actually numb with how hard she's clamped her beak on it.

I was just curious at what age your greys began talking. Tui is around, on average I'd say, six months old. You know how it is in pet shops, they always try and make the animals out younger than they really are. Now, Tui will whistle and click and has even said 'hello' and then gurgles as if she's trying to talk and clear her throat. I always talk to her and so does my fiancee. So she's always got talking going on around her. I was just curious as to the approximate ages that some greys speak at. I know talking isn't vitally important...just as long as your grey is healthy, but I would like her to talk. When we walk out the room she really starts making a lot of noise, but it's mainly whistles and clicks.

I usually put my night time sheet over Tui around 10:00pm just before I go to bed, although sometimes I let her watch the TV before bed. Haha! Her cage is directly facing the TV. She's usually up before me; I'll wake up and see her little head under the edge of the sheet watching me with interest. So as soon as I get up, I take the sheet off her and open the cage and say hello/good morning. So her sleep pattern is pretty much aligned with mine.