Elvenking

Thanks for sharing your understanding of my situation and expressing your feelings. I love Isaac soooo much. It never stops amazing me that I have this little character around the house. It always dawns upon me how amazing the whole experience is. He is so expressive of his attachment to me as well. He comes to my shoulder when I call him...(if I have to...he's always close by). I love the way he rubs his head against my face and my shoulder. I feel the warmest love in the world when he does something that he knows brings joy to my heart. Coming from a bird....I really just can't explain the joy. All I ever want to know is that he is happy. If he picks his feathers and it's just a habit...oh well. I guess that is that. I just don't want him to suffer from anything at all. I am at work right now, but just thinking of him makes me want to go and smooch his back. So I guess I have just adjusted and will keep him healthy in every way I can. Thanks everyone for all the support!

Thanks for this post and all the others helping me get through this. I am much more calm about it today again. I really felt awful when I saw that he gnawed off more yesterday. Most days I can let this go, but yesterday it was very hard. He really is the center of my life in many respects. Most of the joy I get from coming home is all about him. He is my 'significant other' if you will. I do not live with anyone else and my daughter comes over on the weekends. In all other respects, I am really proud of the bird Isaac is. Hell...I have been addicted to things...so I know what it is like to be habitual. I know...I can't fault him at all. Dave...yer right about all the feelings that come up...and yes...he IS spoiled. I think I go to the crazy degree to make sure he is happy. My next move is to make the area around his cage even more expansive and give more options for play time. Anyway...yes...those feelings are there. I am a practicing Buddhist...so I can always also see clearly that my feelings are unwarranted...but I still have them and they can be difficult to negotiate....especially with how much I attribute to myself being the problem. So it's a little personal hell I try to keep at bay. Sometimes I inevitably get hope when they start coming back in which sets me up for hurt. Working on it. I have been misting him regularly, but I can add the formula you speak of as well. We'll give it a shot. Don't worry, I am calm and fine with it all most of the time and I'll get through the tough times. It really helped to see other birds that have this issue. It is really hard to see a feathered Grey and remember how Isaac used to look like that. Thanks for all the posts, I am feeling better today. Isaac is still his happy self....I don't even think that he thinks there is a problem. The whole thing appears to be a problem confined to my own mind for me to overcome, and find a way I shall. Oh yeah...RED PALM OIL.....I always give him a little bit of this on some boiled veggie noodles. He loves em. I'll sometimes mix em up with some eggs and rice...he digs.

Give me something to think so that my heart doesn't break into a million pieces when I see my beautiful baby love do this......

I am certainly discouraged. It is very hard to love him so much, and also let him destroy himself. This is a very difficult cycle to understand and accept. I don't always have the incredible strength it takes to see what he has done to himself and just move on like nothing is wrong. SOMETHING appears to be so terribly wrong! Must be....look at him!! It seems less of a stretch to say that something is terribly wrong, that it is to say everything is fine. He doesn't look like everything is fine. He looks like he hates life until you see him get playful. I just have not found it in me to let it go yet. I have done the thing where I just ignore it...he always manages to do something a bit more impressive and makes it a little harder to move forward. He was fine for so long..and then he did a little more and I was like...alright no big. Then he just leveled some feathers Saturday and it was like....well what the hell happened there. However, still again...oh well. Then I saw a bigger one chewed off in the middle. Okay...I got concerned. Again, I don't see any pictures of other birds who are taking feathers out all over the body and wings. I have only seen tummies. I suppose that it is difficult to accept as a natural course of his life just yet. I know that I have to. How do I not blame myself? How do I ever feel good about myself regarding this? It bothers me the most because I do firmly believe that I am responsible for all of it. While I know that resentment toward him when he does it is totally wrong, I do feel totally responsible and try to see what it is that I did to cause this. I know I should be ignoring it and moving along and I have been doing that for a long time now. It doesn't change anything. Yes he senses my emotions...well then he knows I love him a ton. Too bad, I am human and I am still getting used to watching an animal destroy itself in front of me. Sorry if I haven't come up to speed with my Vulcan powers of not showing any emotion over it. I still have feelings for his well-being and am just a bit more connected than someone who can ignore this.

I know I have tried to adjust to this plucking thing that Isaac has a habit of doing. However, I am not sure how much longer I can accept it. I mean, it appears to me as if I am not doing enough for him. Over the last few days, he really took off and started getting some feathers in bunches. Just when I am willing to let it go and be happy anyway. Awesome yeah? I came home tonight to a larger feather pulled out on the floor of his cage. One he had to absolutely gouge out to get off. What a peach. No matter how good I am to him, he is just going to show me that he wants to self-destroy. This is the thanks I get for all my hours of attention and the way I take my life COMPLETELY OFFLINE for this bird. Man, I have been more than caring and persistent...and loving....but right now...I am saying I need something. Jesus friggin Christ...he sits there and preens continuously. He's okay...he's not okay. His feathers are coming back...nope...today we are ripping that all out. Look...aren't you proud....not exactly little boy. This is a huge back and forth thing with me and each time it happens to a large degree like this, I question everything. I don't even know just how f'd up he is willing to make himself look. Holy mother of all that is good in this world....tell me....HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DEAL WITH THIS???? I have a bird who makes me look like a bird abuser.....all for being everything that I can possibly be for him. I am now...desperate. Someone please tell me how to deal with this. I have seen birds that chew their tummy. I could live with that. I have not seen birds that do what Isaac does unless they have been neglected. Isaac gets un-freaking-believable amounts of love...what gives???? Make it make sense to me. Give me the story I give everyone else when they look at me like I am horrible owner after all the stuff I do. I really need help moving forward on this. Just when I think I know I can be okay with it...he goes and rips a couple of fatter feathers out. If you have a bird that plucks all over...show me a picture...cause I haven't seen them like Isaac. This stuff is ROUGH on my heart. I love him way too much for this to be the result. It doesn't seem normal at all to me. I need help figuring this out. I don't know what to do.

Greycie is a lover! Yep..that is how Issac is when I come home to him. Such a cutie!

Yeah...I also take heart in the fact that it does not appear to be any form of stress-plucking. Looks more like boredom or just over preening with some idea that certain feathers need to go with favoritism toward the tummy. I'll keep searching though.

Yeah I have thought of how having it on my mind would affect him. So I am always sure to ignore any feathers and just start playing with my little guy. I've gotten good at that. He only will pluck a couple here and there. But with the time it takes feathers to come in...that is really all he has to do. He may get better though. I am always keeping an eye out for a signal of some sort. I'm looking into more toy variety now. Looking to see if I can set more up for him to play with in and out of his cage. I am glad I found the plastic bottles he loves to shred. It is hard to find stuff to really engage him like that. It is, in fact, his HUGEST kick right now. He loves my Arrowhead water bottles. I actually have to watch where I put them down. He is always tracking them down and giving them hell. I will sometimes put one down forgetting all about it and he comes in like a bolt of lightening...literally swooping in front of me to attack that bottle. Cups too of course. Twice the other week...I came in a placed a fresh cup of cola full of ice on the counter...only to have him swoop in seconds later to knock it on the floor. By the time I see him swooping in, I am already too far away to act on it. Ahhh man that sucks! I can't fault him though..I taught him to play with one I guess. LOL. The items I use to drink from have enthralled Isaac since he was a baby. It was, after all, his first toy he fell in love with. Silly parrot. I'll keep looking out for my little guy. He's a really sweet Grey!!

Well folks. Here is the update. Isaac plucks. LOL. I'm out of things to try and there seems to be no connection to any of my actions or activities to when he chooses to pluck. It's very rare that he does, but he does...and it is enough to keep his tummy ragged. His back is filling in, but I am kind of done watching and hoping for anything different. He'll have to decide if he wants to begin keeping his feathers nice again if he ever does. So it's time to move on and let things be. If he ever does get into a situation where he stops for good...that will be some kind of miracle. My only guess is that he learned something that cannot be unlearned. He has no motivation to break a habit like this. He doesn't have sessions when he just has to rip out feathers...he just prunes the odd feather here and there...and particularly likes doing this on his tummy. What are ya gonna do right? So there ya have it. I can get sad when I see pictures of fully feathered greys because I know that I will never have Isaac looking like that again. On top of that, I know that it is all my doing for making a parrot my life companion. I at least know that he is happy to be with me...cause I see the fun he has in my home with me and my daughter. Wish me and my boy well on our adventures. I love my baby sooooooo much and will take care of him forever. One thing that makes Isaac kind of unique is the way he is such a sweetheart. Whenever I lean my head towards him to give him a kiss on his beak, he seems to know what I am up to and stretches his neck out in anticipation...meeting me halfway if you will. He also shows affection by rubbing his head on my shoulder. He will do this especially when it's bedtime. A kind of emotional bargaining chip to get a little more out time. He knows he can tame me instantly with it. I think he thinks his name is 'litah boooyeee' for sure. He says it just like my daughter does now too. He says it with so many different inflections. However the best is the sound of my daughter...it's really quiet and soft. I think he likes saying it too cause when she comes over he will say it to her a lot. She can always get a nice clean one from him if she comes over to him and says 'hi'. "Litah booOOOooooyee". He also acts totally wacky and crazy...shaking his head and sounding like a turkey. Calling like a crow...my favorite is his chicken impression. Hilarious. He does a good dog, dove, and many other song birds from outside. Sometimes he will be by the open window and make these little tiny tweets that he can hear in the distance which I believe are humming bird tweets. By far the most heart melting though...is a good peek-a-boo from a parrot. If that doesn't make you smile, you must be dead or something. He can also perform multiple variations of farts and burps. I wouldn't have it any other way. LOL. If you laugh...he will laugh with you. Just now he started clucking like a chicken and I started cracking up because it is really funny sometimes the way he carries on. Then I laugh and he gives me this laugh where he is even wheezing a little to get the real belly-laugh in there. It's exchanges like that that make it all worth it I guess. It can even be tough to place them in a cage at all when you get so close to them. I begin to feel like....my goodness....there is a little kid inside of that bird you know. I just went to go turn the light off so he could get some sleep...it's his bedtime. I asked him for a kiss....and he tooted back. A familiar exchange. He little way of saying...not now...I guess. After I laugh though...he does end up giving me a proper little kiss. Goodnight little booooyyeee. And I'll say good night for now too. G'night all.

\ Hahahhahhhahha. Ohh my that is funny. Yes...if I am thinking that I have to be home with my bird at that moment...I get quite volatile. I get snappy. I just care for him so much it's crazy. I always see it like....I am all he has. No one else will look for him after they get off work...be excited to come home and see him every day....think about his diet and make sure he is kept healthy...and to just stare at him sometimes like a star-struck fan of some sort. He's really filling in fast this time around. Still no tweaked feathers...and tummy feathers...I haven't seen those in over a year. So.....so....soooooooo proud of my little guy. Just hoping he hangs in there. I am almost sure the plastic bottles he chews on are helping too. He mangles those every day. I flatten them and jam them between the bars. Life couldn't be better.

A little update. So far....not so much as a tweaked feather. No plucked feathers. I am pretty proud of us. I have resisted cuddling his cute little ass too much and kept our contact still loving, just not so much physical contact and no cupping his body and burying kisses into his back. Honestly...I am not sure he liked it as much as I did. He is such a cute little being though. I love him so much. He is only preening like normal now and he hasn't barbed a single feather. Go boy...GO!

I have had the same virus, it has eaten over six keyboards, destroyed a motherboard and even tore up my computer chair. These viruses are super nasty. LOL

Thanks for following the chronicles of me and my little grey friend. I am so tuned to my little guy and what he expects...lol...I break myself and become a better person all the time. Take today for instance. I knew I had to go somewhere after 7 tonight...and I usually come home from work at 6 to stay with him all night. So I had to leave work a little early to come home and spend some time with my boy. I tell the guy who was going to pick me up that I would meet him there for another extra 15 minutes home with my birds before. Making a total of 65 minutes with my bird till I can get back at 8:30 and give him more of my time. If I couldn't get that, then someone would be getting disappointed...but never my bird. Not a chance. We love our greys!

Thanks for such sweet words. I really do love him more than most anything. He is a primary concern in my life and I always want to see him have the best life possible. I am getting cautiously excited again as brand new pins are popping out all over his body and he hasn't messed with any of em yet. So far he seems to be set up for success. Another great thing I finally found is something that he continuously likes to play with in his cage now. I had been struggling for a while to find something he likes to play with during the day when I am gone. Plastic water bottles. I crush one and jam it in between the bars and oh does he LOVE to chew that thing and make noises with it all the time. I come home to mutilated bottles and it's exciting, because he will choose those over his feathers now. He is really doing good and I love him with all my heart. This is the time I really have to watch myself, cause the cuter he gets, the more I want to grab him and hold him and kiss him excessively, but I am doing good. He still gets all of the attention, head scratches and love a bird should get, just without the overwhelming smothering I was doing before. I know there seems to be some concern expressed for the sudden reduction in contact with Isaac, but I wouldn't be alarmed. You just have to know that what I was doing before was quite over the top and needed to be toned down. Isaac seems even more happier now, I am watching him closely. He still gets a few smooches and lots of love. He was on my shoulder last night asking for and getting all the head scratches he has ever wanted. He is totally happy. So not to worry. I would never let my baby feel anything other than loved.

HAHAHHAHA..."Exactly.....what kind of cuddling WERE you doing with your bird sir?" Again, this is simply the best theory I have for him beginning his plucking and persisting it. However, it makes the most sense. I also think that this bird....REALLY loves me too. He knows he is super safe with me and lets me get away with anything. Mostly I am just always cupping his body and kissing his back as I pass him on the counter or somewhere else. Pretty much every time I see em...I almost have to go cuddle him. I guess I would pet the sides of his body too to rub his soft little bird body. Tons of kisses on the head, tummy, back, and beak...( I don't think the beak is a problem though...hopefully...cause I still do that a little.) I'd pet under his wings. It is funny I didn't really see exactly how touchy I was being. I was always super gentle though. Maybe he is plucking trying to say....NOOOOO...c'mon man...ease up. Anyway...he seems fine with the reduced handling. I still pick him up and kiss em on the beak sometimes and tell him what an awesome bird he is. Everything else is still the same with my energy around him..just less touching. There is no guarantee that he will leave himself alone...but we'll see. Either way, I don't want to give him the wrong idea. I wouldn't worry about games that they think are fun. I think Isaac views my contact as something much different. I think he thinks that we are "meant" for each other...and he is frustrated. It would explain why he is trying to mate with my face when I am on the phone, or feed me when I get out of the shower. Both of which have not happened since I have stopped the excessive cuddling. It's only been a few days...but I will keep ya posted.

I hear ya. I'll keep it at an occasional, normal level. He seems totally happy with me not cuddling all over him though. He's happy.

I think he will be okay with me backing off for a while. He still gets loads of attention and is probably okay with this. I'll keep watching him though. New pin feathers are coming in now too...so a good time to keep the baths coming and my hands off. He'll still get loads of head scratches. We'll watch him.

it is because his daddy cannot keep his hands off him. Uhhhhgg. I was reading many articles on plucking and one person was telling their story and they mentioned that all along they thought they were just loving their bird up when really, it was actually frustrating them sexually. When I read that, I was like....I am mega guilty! I am always cupping my hands around him and kissing him and cuddling him. Probably to the tune of him plucking his feathers. It makes the most sense because...when the only thing I do is love and care for this bird as much as I do, the only thing I could be doing wrong is too much of something. Well...given that....I am not sure if I have already done the damage....but I am going to be very hands off other than head scratches as Isaac's requests them. Thoughts anyone? Anyone ever over-cuddle their bird and have this experience? Stephen

Yeah...regarding the lucking...I have realized it's kind of like "the cat is out of the bag" kind of thing where...once they are aware of the benefits (what ever those might be) of this habit...they just do not unlearn it. It will always be triggerable. Otherwise...he is one hilarious bird filled with tons of love. I always have to keep him from sharing his food with me. I guess I am doing a good job keeping him fed...otherwise I don't think he would be so emphatic about feeding me. "I'm good boy...it's okay...you can keep those noodles." Always perking me up with a 'peek-a-boo' no matter what's going on...there is just no not melting to a passive state of awe when he does that. So I am pretty much going to have a fluffy bird. So what I have been doing for toys is just overwhelming him with choices. He's like a baby...so I just do like we used to do with my daughter.....I place him somewhere and then put lots of choices around for him...ice trays, cups, bowls, empty water jugs (one of his latest favorites...loves to chew that nozzle off)...stuff like that. and he finds something. He loves to flap and play on the table or the ground. He's really good at balancing and standing on the side of a cup. Just look at this guy...flies up to the door...grabs on...and that.... ..here he is with his goofball dad hooting in his cup... http://vid952.photobucket.com/albums/ae6/Elvenking71/Bird/65783C21-0416-4076-B62C-0D4D80EFA3B7.mp4 ..hope that works.. anyway....he is a happy bird. I just want to give him lots of choices. Thanks for the suggestions and thoughts.

Yeah....I will have to try that trick with Isaac. He likes all the stuff he can't have a lot. So I will try to pretend some of his toys are mine. We'll see how it goes.

Ohh yes...he still loves his cups and plays for hours with them. Sometimes....it's just not the thing though. I'll have to look at these activity books...thank you so much! He loves to fly around too...hangs upside-down like a bat from my door moldings...he gets around like nothing. I do all I can for the little guy. He eats meals with me...he's a total side kick....I just wish I had more he was interested in....so hopefully I can find something for him. I am thnking maybe I should wrap some plastic bottle in paper and give him that...he just loves all containers....but only for a little bit...unless it is his coveted cup....or any new cup freshly filled with liquid.

For a Grey that wants to play with everything but bird toys. He wants bottles filled with whatever, my shoes, anything but a bird toy. What do you do? I am desperately seeking a strategy as I am telling him what not to get at more than anything lately and running out of ideas to keep him entertained. He often never plays with his toys in his cage either. Anyone have a strategy? Just got done spending more money on toys that will never get touched. I will settle for knowing what it is I am doing to screw my birds development up at every turn...LOL. He's a plucker for life now...I am sure of that. All I am trying to do is give this bird a great life, but I cannot figure out why he is taking on more ill behavior.

Thanks everyone for writing the kind words of encouragement. I'll be thinking up other things to try for sure. He's a good boy. By the way...his newest thing is wire mesh strainer. One of the handheld ones you can use to smooth out flour or strain water from a handful of noodles for your parrot. Anyway...if I had ever imagined that a strainer which costed 9.99 could provide sooooo many hours of fun, I would have given it up a long time ago. I will post some pictures of him playing with it soon in another thread. Maybe video if I can get it up there.

Yep...that is the toughest part for me right now. I actually had it wired before I wrote my last post, I was over his plucking and just letting it be. However some guilt comes back when I talk about it. Hard to not believe that I am not just missing something. I keep thinking and wondering. But I have beat myself up enough over it. I'll always keep wondering what he is thinking, so maybe something will come one day. Until then...it's "Mr. Fuzzy Butt" for Isaac. That's his new nickname.

If he is okay, I am. The little guy gets all the love of an only child. It is just when he looks like he does in those pictures....it is hard to imagine that he is okay. I actually wish the ones that stick out would get taken off, the plain fuzz is better than a mix like that. Hey...at least he can't reach his head.