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[casper]

Good look in finding a good home for your baby birdlover.

 

I think it must have been hard for you to come to the decision to rehome your grey but if you feel that will be best for both of you that is what you must do.

 

If you decide to keep your baby you know we are always here to help:)

 

Keep us posted.

[birdlover111]

Yes we hope it happens quickly so he can bond with his new owner. The longer he stays here with me the harder it is to imagine him not being here. I know this sounds weird coming from me but it really upsets me since this is something that i really wanted. So far the soonest he will leave is the beggining of July. Thats a month and a half away from now and I know in that long period of time I am going to go round for round with this decision. I think the best thing for rico is to go to this other home but my heart is breaking. Is there any comfort that anyone is able to give me so I know i am doing the right thing. Am I doing the right thing??????????

This is terrible.

[LindaMary]

Yes, birdlover, you are absolutely doing the right thing.

 

What I think you need to focus on right now is really vetting the "several people" who may be interested in re-homing Rico. If it were me trying to do this, I would first sit myself down and try to shift my view of my own role into that of a really caring foster parent. You want to be as sure as you can that the next home Rico goes to will be a home he can really stay in. Make sure they understand what you now understand: the daily time commitment required; the need for interaction and for patience; the mess and the expense - in addition to all the really cool things about greys that a lot of people have heard about by now.

 

Easy to say - hard to do! I completely understand your doubts and that this is really a pretty painful decision for you. Yes, you will probably miss him. But I think within a short period of time you will probably also feel much relieved, and that you have really done right by him.

 

Good for you for coming here and going through this difficult process in the forum. I can tell you are really struggling; and exposing yourself to possible judgement and discomfort in order to arrive at the right thing for Rico. Karma to you.

[birdlover111]

Thank you so much for the kind words. It is very nice of you to be so understanding.

[lovethatgrey]

Glad that you decided to post again.{Feel-good-00020114}.

 

It sounds like you've done alot of reflecting. I respect your decision and reasons for thinking you have to go in this direction. I also understand that you have very mixed emotions about the whole thing and are somewhat disappointed that things worked out this way. You will probably question and doubt yourself for a while.. but that's perfectly natural and completely understandable! I also believe that if your heart and mind are not fully determined to make it work, then it probably best to find the right home for Rico. Having parrots as pets really isn't easy. It takes alot of work but I have to admit, I LOVE my parrots and all the efforts that I put into making our co-existance pleasurable is completely worth it. Sort of like the way you feel about your dog!

 

On another note, my grey Emma is pretty quiet but I did feel that I needed to purchase earplugs a month or 2 ago because there are times when she makes me feel that I may lose my hearing one day.:blink: in my case it just isn't a constant shrieking thank goodness. Regardless, I am very happy with my Emma and very happy with my earplugs! As long as I have parrots, I will continue to have earplugs.

 

 

Anyway, druing the time that Rico is still with you. please feel free to continue posting here for some advice or to share. After all, this is what the forum is for.

 

Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/05/15 22:24

 

Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/05/15 22:27

 

Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/05/15 22:32<br><br>Post edited by: lovethatgrey, at: 2009/05/15 22:33

[birdlover111]

I must say that by far this is the best forum out there. I feel like I can open up here and not be condemed for it. I really do love rico but he would be better off with someone whom can give him undivided attention. I just hope that this time period goes by very quickly.

Again thank you and hats off to all of you for making me feel just a little better about my decision.

[SamsDad]

Birdlover,

 

Boy is it ever a tough decision to rehome your pet. You always feel like you are "giving up" on them and wonder if there wasn't something else you could have done.

 

I faced the same decision about 10 years ago with my Amazon Franky. I had already had my Timneh Nelson for 10 years and I always wanted an Amazon. I figured I could easily handle two birds. Franky was a great bird, very outgoing and playful. He hed the perfect temperment for taking with me on drives and he loved to walk around the yard and to dig in the dirt while I gardened. He didn't talk much but he's lean out on my shoulder look me in the eye and say in a very soft sexy whispering voice - "hhhi..." It was really cute.

 

But having a great relationship with my two favorite birds was not to last. Nelson my Timneh became VERY jealous and started banging on his cage with his beak when he saw me with Franky. He's then reach down and pull at his chest feathers. Now that I think back about it I remember him climbing into the corner of his cage where his back was against the corner, his feet splayed and he'd bend over to pull at his chest. To counter this I started spending more time with Nelson and that's when Franky's screaming started. H-O-L-Y S-M-O-K-E-S was that the loudest thing I'd ever heard come out of an animal. I live on 5 acres in the county and one time I was at the end of the property 600 feet away and I could hear him clear as day with the doors and windows closed!!!! :ohmy: At first it was infrequent. I tried to not re-inforce the behaviour so I took to covering him when he did it. Then when he behaved, I'd uncover him. This only worked for a short time. The glass breaking screaming became more and more frequent and it was joined by my wife and daughter yelling at me to shut that STUPID BIRD UP!

 

Both of my birds had lots of out time and were placed in the family room where they could be in the center of activity, but things were deteriorating. Each bird wanted 100% of my attention. The screaming was getting worse, as was Nelsons acting out and self destruction. I had to make my choice and it was REALLY, REALLY, HARD. I decided that I owed my first bird my complete attention. He had been with me for 10 years and we were very close before Franky came into the house. I placed an ad for rehoming and ended up selling Franky to a great family for $200 including a cage. He was going to spend time in the center of thier small country store where he could interact with customers and be the center of attention. It really hurt me to see him go out the door that day, but I know it was the best thing for Franky, Nelson and my family. It wasn't long before Nelson was back to normal and my house was back in balance. I learned I was a 1 bird person. Its a little ironic too, because my wife and I had decided long ago to only have one child so they wouldn't have to share us with another sibling - I shoulda known....

 

Like the others have said, do your best to work with Rico until its time for him to leave. They sometimes go through periods of acting up and maybe he's just going through the Grey version of the terrible twos and he'll get over it... until he hit the terrible teens, and the bratty-snotty-monster-bird-from-hell stage. :evil: I think that's why they can be sooooo cute most of the time - so when they act up you don't end up having them for dinner with a nice brown gravy and mashed potatos. Huuummmm. which wine goes best with Grey, white or Red??????

 

If it doesn't work, you can rest assured you did your best. For my whole life, I've been great with animals, but I learned I'm only able to handle one bird - five cats maybe, but that's easy. I could be dead in my chair and they's still be happy sitting in my lap! Although come to think of it I bet Sam would enjoy picking pieces of my corpse apart until I was a big pile of shredded "stuff" in the chair. :blink:

 

Tom

[Char]

I think you are making the right decision for you and the bird. I think you were given some bad information in the beginning about how much time and attention a Grey needs. When I got my Grey I knew I was taking on a bird that would need a lot of attention. I was married at the time and even though I have long days my husband would get home early afternoons and I knew she would have lots of out of cage time.

 

My husband and I separated and I was very worried about how Whisper would react to the change of not having as much out time. I even worried that I would have to give her up if she started plucking or screaming.

 

Fortunately it has worked out. Even though I still am gone all day I make it up to her when I get home. she gets 2-3 hrs out of cage time and lots of that is shoulder/cuddle time. I make sure she has interesting toys and she has the T.V. for 4 hrs in the mornings. I come straight home everyday and won't even stop at the store. I don't have much social life and it is a big sacrifice but she is worth it. She is so special.

 

She is going to have a sister soon and that will give her some company during the day also.

 

I do realize that some of the reason it works for us is due to her personality. She is very sweet and laid back. Another Grey with a more high strung personality it might not work at all.

 

Good luck to you and your bird. I wish you both the best. Just please make sure that whomever you rehome it with understands the time and commitment required.

[birdlover111]

It might be easier if rico liked my husband as well. He might get more time out of his cage then. but rico only likes me. The people that are interested in him told me that the husband had a grey years ago but had t get rid of it due to his brothers allergy. they say they are ready for the commitment. I just really wish that they could take him sooner. Rico is stuck with us till July1st. I jut hope they bond well with him and he is happy. We are suppose to meet them onthe 31stof this month so they can meet rico and give us the first half of the money. Were also having them sign a contract and they are not allowed to take rico till the balance is paid in full. I am giving them his cage and toys and all as well so rico canat least be in his same cage surroundings

[Tycos_mom]

If you feel these people are the right people to adopt your Grey But if the have to make payments on the adoption fee your asking are you sure they can afford the cost of keeping an African grey They aren't exactly cheep to keep with vet checkups every year and the cost of nutritous food not just a seed diet. then there is the toy situation even though I do make my own allot of the time It still runs me a good 100. dollars a month for toys and accsesory's I would make sure that they totally understand the finacal commitment as well as the time required they are very expensive and not for just anybody. and then theres the cost of home repairs because as they get older the like to find different things to chew on. I would make sure you screen all potencial owners and make sure they have what it takes to keep an African Grey. I really think that you have made the right decision for yourself and your bird but I would really hate to see Rico passed around from home to home because people don't properly understand what is involed in keeping a bird happy and healthy.

[birdlover111]

Well I understand the having to break it up into payments. I did this with my breeder. Just because it takes a person a little bit to get the money together does not mean they cant afford to take care of him. I made most of his toys and fed him fresh veggies and fruits plus seed and pellet daily.

As far as screening them goes i can only ask the questions and hope that they are telling the truth. Once rico is paid for and with them I cant do anymore. Ithinkthey really want himand are willing to do whatis necessary. I am just not willing to lock up my dog for most of the dayto let rico be free. other than that i am a good home for him.

[doubletefarm]

As far as screening.. you can ask for a vet reference if they have another pet. If they don't then it doesn't apply. But... I would strongly advise against just "taking their word".

 

I give away horses and have seen the worst. I now check all references that I can. With a parrot it is very hard to check ref's... but if they have any other animals check with their vet to see if they pay their bills (indicates stability) and if they seem to be able to notice when something is wrong, or if they wait till it is almost too late.

[Jane08]

I am sorry you have to give up your grey because of the screaming. I feel very sad for Rico and hope you find him a nice home. We also had a screamer, she did it all the time when she was young as well. It does take commitment, patience and time to turn it around and make it stop. It is good that you have decided to find him another home if you don't have the commitment to look after him.

 

Please have some compassion for Rico until you can find him a new home and realise that he didn't ask to come and live with you.

 

Good luck with finding him a new home.

[Natasha]

Birdlover

 

This is a sad situation wish I lived there I would have taken him Please check that he has a loving home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like Jane says he didn't ask to be in this situation .......... !!!

 

Good luck take care

[JungleDreamz]

You are making the right decision...I have had to rehome a bird too, And I know how you feel..Just horrible, I felt like I was pond scum...BUT The more I thought about it, I realized it was just the unselfish thing to do...He was so set on scream, like one of the other people here said, it comes to be a learned behavior, and the bird I rehomed had been screaming for attention for 7 years...I felt like it was wrong to try to tell him not to...It was just what he had become, and now he is SO happy, He can make all the noise he wants, he is at an aviary with thousands of other birds...

 

I agree, it wouldnt be fair to your dog ethier...My dog is also my baby...He is really like my child, But he gets along with the birds well really he was raised around all my birds, so he just pays them no attention at all LoL...But I would do the same thing if I had to keep him pinned up all day just because of some other creature wether it be bird, cat, whatever....I am not saying I dont love my birds, I love them dearly, It is just differant with my dog, Tghe love is diferant, like I said, Like love I would have for my own baby. So what I am trying to say, Is I can TOTALLY see where you are coming from.

 

And it wouldnt be fair to your bird ethier to keep him pinned up all day cuz of the dog or any other animal...So you are defanitly doing the right thing, For all members of your little family.

[birdlover111]

THANK YOU JungleDreamz. My saint bernard has been with us for 6 years now. He is my baby. I do love rico and that is why I am rehoming him. I wish someone on here lived closer and wanted a grey like rico. He would be much better if he was able to be out alot more. I have not made up my mind about these people yet. I amnot sure what to do. No one else is really interested in him.

[birdlover111]

THank you all for all of your advice and help. I wanted to let you guys know that rico went to a great home about a week ago not. This lady is the same age as me...31. She is in school and is training to become a vet tech. She had always wanted a african grey. SO I figured I made the right decision. It is hard some days to not see rico there in the living room. But I know that he is with someone that has the time to devote to him.

I just hope that rico and his new mom bond well and forever!

Thanks again for all the advice.

Jeannine

[judygram]

Thanks Jeannine for letting us know about Rico, I know this was not an easy decision but it was for the best and I hope Rico and his new owner will bond and be forever friends.

[Natasha]

Karma to you for finding him a great forever home!!!

[Luvparrots]

So glad you found a great forever home for Rico. I hope you told Rico's parront about the GreyForms so we might be able to hear about Rico once in awhile. Take care of yourself and thank you for loving Rico enough to make sure that he will be happy, that's the best parront. One who does what is best for their companions. :kiss:

[Raposa]

I am sorry you had to rehome Rico, but I am sure you made the right decision for your family and hopefully for Rico as well I am a bit puzzled about the idea of needing to lock up either your dog or your bird all day because of some other creature . . . My dogs spend time outdoors, which is a good time for the bird to be out. And I have a ferret who is NEVER allowed out of his cage in the same room as the bird, but that does not mean that they both can't have plenty of out of cage time. Anyway, I guess everybody works these things out the best way they can, and I congratulate you for taking care to make sure Rico has a good home

[Tycos_mom]

I agree totally you are a great Parront when a person cannot do the job themselves for what ever reason the its so much better to rehome and let someone else take over. I so wish that my Macaws previous parront did what you did. she didn't though Instead she locked him up all by himself with no interaction for 6 or 7 years. Nom I have him and he has no Idea how to behave around people. We are getting there slowly. She developed an alergy to him after her cancer treatments. I can tell you that I totally repct you for making the right desision good for you a good luck to you in your future