tayjo54 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Hello! I'm new to this forum and was wondering if someone can offer some advice. I've had my grey for 3 1/2 years. I moved to a new place last march and my she was fine. Then a month later my husband left for a deployment(who she didn't like) and she started to act a little different. Then a few weeks later she jumped on the floor and my doberman ran over to her and I think he just scared her. He didn't do anything at all to her. But ever since then she seems to not like me at all. She is afraid to come out of the cage. I'll bring her out and she'll sit on her perch and I'll sit with her on my hand for a few hours each night. But she still seems afraid of me. She use to really act like she loved me...would regurgitate her food on me..LOL..I could lay her on her back and scratch her belly etc...and would talk all the time..Now she acts afraid and only talks when nobody is in the room. Does anyone know whe she may be acting afraid and how I get her to be comfortable with me again? Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave007 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 It's best to give a time line. How long ago did this incident happen with the dog? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tayjo54 Posted January 3, 2009 Author Share Posted January 3, 2009 It happened in May 2008....and sometimes she seems like she will warm up to me then she goes back to being afraid again.<br><br>Post edited by: tayjo54, at: 2009/01/03 01:14 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave007 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 It's very hard to pinpoint exactly what the problem is. Yes, the dog probably scared her and she's decided to stay where it's safe. It may not have looked serious to you but it wasn't happening to you. As far as her not liking you, I doubt that she would stay on your arm for a couple of hrs if she didn't like you. She may be in a situation where her habits are changing. After all, she's going into that adult stage and many greys when getting to that stage become somewhat more aloof, distant and enjoy staying by themselves in a cage. Some playful activity often lessens. None of these things are unusual but I can tell you that when greys start behaving like that, many, many people get upset. The first thing people do is blame themselves. Usually, it'll take a grey quite a while to form a new set of habits. Your best bet right now is to let her *come to you*. It can take a while but greys are very curious and eventually they won't like being ignored and will investigate. If your bird is used to coming out of the cage and is safe with the cage door open, keep it open for a longer period of time. Give some treats to her by hand such as pieces of almonds or walnuts. Do this when she's on your arm and when she's in the cage and if she's on a playstand. Do these things frequently but don't expect anything back from her. Add a few new toys one at a time to perk her interest in something new. If you use a playstand, have one near you. That way she's near you but doesn't have to be touched by you. Believe it or not, that calms birds down and helps them to relax around a person. As far as your husband going away, well I personally feel that it has nothing to do with your situation. He left a long time ago. It might mean something if your bird really liked your husband but you said she didn't. Another different reaction by her in the future might occur when he gets home but right now, that's only in the future. The only thing I can suggest is that you just go along with the situation and let her get comfortable in the way she wants to get comfortable. Understand that that 3 1/2 yr old grey you have is no longer that sweet cuddly bird that you originally purchased. Greys are only like that when they're young but eventually the *grey* personality emerges and it has nothing to do with liking or disliking you. Your main concern is knowing that she's healthyn and if she is, it'll simply be a waiting game.<br><br>Post edited by: Dave007, at: 2009/01/03 02:05 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tayjo54 Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 thanks for your response. does anyone else have any ideas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvparrots Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Tayjo, did you change your hairstyle or start wearing something that your grey might not like. A change of shampoo or lipstick, anything that might be different. Is your doberman normally with you all the time, by your side perhaps. Your grey might still be leery of your dog. These are just some thoughts. I hope things get better. By the way, what is your grey's name? If you have any pictures you would like to share, we would love to see them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaxtersMom Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 You said your greys behavior changed after you moved and then after your husband was deployed. Even though she was not close to your husband that might have been a big part of it. She might not care that he is gone for awhile but I'm sure it has affected you emotionally. I'm sure you are missing him and obviously worried about him while he is away serving our country. Parrots are very empathetic and they can pick up on our moods so well. She may be feeding off your emotion and perhaps worried about you or can feel the tension. I am not sure if you are worried or stressed or sad or anything else but greys can pick up on those as well as happy, excited and engergetic. Your behavoir has most likely change somewhat since you are living in a new place and without your husband. The enviornment has changed and your grey has too to some extent. Keep trying to reassure her and let her know she is loved and hopefully she will come back around to her old self. Laugh with her, play with her, be happy around her and just relax and have fun with her again. And as Dave pointed out she is getting older and perhaps less dependant on you and your attention. It may just be part of her growing up stages, too. Just curious, has your husband come back from his tour yet? If not, hopefully soon.<br><br>Post edited by: BaxtersMom, at: 2009/01/05 05:22 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
she Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 I think as Dave said your little grey is growing up. Some do not like cuddles and very close contact as they mature. Is she clipped? if so consider letting her wings grow so she may just regain some confidence.<br><br>Post edited by: she, at: 2009/01/05 21:43 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tayjo54 Posted January 6, 2009 Author Share Posted January 6, 2009 thanks for all your replies, i will keep being consistant with reassurance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyric Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 She went through a lot of changes in a short amount of time, a move, someone in the flock leaving, then the scare with the dog. Since greys are prey animals they can have quite a reaction to feeling like they are in a dangerous situation. She may just not feel safe again yet. Give her time and let her readjust to things. I know it's been awhile since these things happened but it can take birds longer to adjust to things then you may realize. Her personality may remain like this but keep giving her your love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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