My new Grey, Reagan

[LadyLinda]

I have had my TAG for two months. He was in a cage in a pet store for three years, and never handled. I couldn't stand his situation, he seemed responsive to me, so after visiting him a week I bought him.

 

Over these weeks we have settled into a routine. He lives in the computer room in our house, next to the only window. He is with me as I type.

 

He is very nippy and shy and doesn't want me too close. He will "flap his wings" for me in greeting when I enter the room, or when I ask him to. He will not get on my hand - though he did my arm a few times - but he will get into the cage for me at night or when I have to leave if I gently nudge him along with a dowel. So long as I'm home he is on his playstand on top of the cage.

 

About a month ago I was so discouraged with Reagan's unavailablity that I hired an expert to come here and work with him. The guy toweled him, clipped his wings, and brought him into the living room. He held the bird in a towel for some time before letting him wander around. He said the bird seems healthy and is still quite young and has every hope he'll become a good pet/companion.

 

But the bird had quite a violent reaction to being handled. He now hates towels and freaks when I have one in my hand. We had a few bad scenes when I tried to treat him the way this bird expert did. I called the man and he said the bird was just trying to get the upper hand - but I have no stomach for power plays with my pet, expecially when he can deliver such a bite!

 

So I have rejected this man's training methods. Now I'm letting Reagan be and go at his own pace. I just wish I felt more confident that Reagan and I will eventually have a close and trusting relationship which I long for. Am I being wise or the bird's patsy?

[judygram]

I commend you for taking in this grey, poor thing spent all of 3 years in a cage all the time but now he has a new home and he will come around in time.

 

You have to understand this will take lots of time and 2 months is not long enough, this may take a year or two but patience is key here so take it slow and easy.

 

He does not trust you yet and the towel thing didn't help any but if you work at it in time he will come to trust you and then you will have a more loving companion.

 

I don't blame him for his reaction to being toweled and it will take a long time for him to not be scared of seeing a towel.

 

I think you will see more results with letting Reagan go at his own pace, he will let you know when he is ready for more handling from you. But in the meantime continue to do what you are doing now, that is the only way to form the bond necessary for him to come to trust you and he will so be patient.

 

Others will chime in with their ideas and suggestions, probably more helpful than what I have given you but at least I have given you something to think about.

[LadyLinda]

Thanks for the encouragement. One friend told me that this expert's advice might work with a less intelligent bird. Don't know. Reagan seems plenty smart, however.

 

Anyway, we are getting a new bird today - a baby lesser sulfur cockatoo. He'll be living upstairs and we will introduce the two slowly. It is my hope that when Reagan sees the baby on my hand and shoulder he might be inspired and his fears lessened.

 

That's another thing this expert told me: don't get another bird for at least two months! But my longing for avian closeness trumps his advice - as does my desire to see my grey comfortable trumps his toweling techniques.

[Irishchicky]

aww the poor bird! you were great to take him! Im sorry i can give you any advice as im a new owner too!

 

I wish you the best of look and let us know how you get on!!

[she]

Hi. Well done you for realising that the so called experts advise and methods do not work for your bird. Greys are very complex sensitive birds and having been in his situation in the pet store, two months is not long enough for him to adjust.Patiance and time is the key with greys. I actually think from your post that you were doing pretty well without the so called expert.Let your bird have space and time and dont push,go at his pace.It may take a long while but believe me it will be worth it. I am not sure about the wisdom of obtaining another bird, Cockatoos are very hard work and so demanding.Greys are very different to toos and many greys will not tolerate cuddles but have there own way of showing love and affection and comunication. I think Reagan needs lots of time , patiance and tlc. Good luck and let us know how you get on.

[LadyLinda]

Thank you so much for the responses. I have to say that though he will not let me close, Reagan is very good company. He seems tuned in to me, watches me, likes to play bird fetch. He will take food from my hand and loves grapes. Sometimes he rings his bell and I ring mine and we have a kind of duet.

 

I have had many opportunities to sell or rehome him - and one was a particularly good situtation. Also, a breeder wanted to take him in exchange for a baby of a different species.

 

But, having removed him from the store I just feel such a responsibility. And now, it's too late. It would confuse and upset him to change locales and people. So, I guess I'm in it for the long haul.

 

Recently, I saw a woman in public with a CAG on her shoulder. The bird was 18 and the two had such a close relationship. He was preening her hair as we spoke. In a way it was hard for me to see this, but perhaps Reagan is in my life to teach me patience and loving kindness. And who knows? Perhaps what I saw is a snapshot of our future together.

[danmcq]

You are a special person to have seen that poor Grey in the pet shop and acted upon you gut feelings. Most people would never view it like you did. :-) Karma to you.

 

I am sorry to hear both you and your Grey went through such a traumatic experience with the supposed "Bird Expert". Toweling is a very scary event for a bird that has not been desynthesized to a towel and learned to trust and play with them. It is not surprising that just the sight of that scary thing that attacked him induces fear and strong reaction.

 

You have been doing everything correctly in building the trust, that you must if you wish closer interaction than you presently have.

 

But, as others have already said, that will take months and patience, which you have already displayed.

 

Actually the way he interacts with you presently, is pretty good for a bird that has been cage bound in a pet shop for all the people to poke, prod and bang on the cage at. Like you commonly see go on in a pet shop.

 

It truly sounds like he chose you from the get go sensing there was something in you that the others did not have. They are very intelligent and sensitive creatures that sometimes almost seem to have a true ESP ability about them.

 

You mentioned keeping him in the computer room. That is good as long as you spend a lot of time in there. Normally the optimal placement of a Cage is in the living area where most the people are and interact with each other through out the day and evening. They truly like to feel like they are a member of the flock and being where the flock normally congregates is that spot.

 

You will definitely learn patience, as you mentioned that perhaps that's why he came into your life. :-) One thing to note, is that they are a joy and blessing to have around whether they become a shoulder rider, cuddle muffin or not. Only time will tell that. Just like people, everyone of them has their own personality.

 

But, I can tell you that they bring a joy and add a dimension to any family just being themselves and entertaining you with their antics. :-)

[Luvparrots]

Welcome to the family LadyLinda. It's wonderful that you gave Reagan a new home and I commend you for your good heart. I am glad you decided to reject "the expert's" methods. There are alot of very experienced members of this great forum family and if you ask I am sure they will be more than happy to answer and give you first-hand knowledge to help you out. Can't wait to see some pictures of Reagan and your new baby cockatoo.

[Tycos_mom]

I rescued a Grey about 1 1/2 years ago now. and although she chose me from the begining it still took 7 months before she would allow me to touch her anywhere except her beak. We have come a very long way since then but it took tons of patiance and love. For the first while I thought she would never allow me to get close but one night before covering her cage she put her head down as if to say its ok to scritch me if you want. So of course I jumped at the chance. It was no more than a 1 second touch but just the fact that she allowed it thrilled me to no end I was on cloud 9 for 2 days. in the days after that first touch it turned into a nightly thing and she allowed more and more scritches. now it takes a good 1/2 hour to put her to bed with the playing and scratching and kissing. Don't get discouraged it will happen for you also. I do think getting another bird may help a little if your Grey sees you handleing the other bird and no harm is comeing to it and that you are a very caring and gentle person. I have an Amazon that I've had for a long time and her and I have a wonderful close relationship I cuddle and snuggle her and roll her over and over again and Tyco my Grey watches us play and cuddle all the time. I'm sure that is what made her decide that she wanted some of that affection also and so she put her head down one night to see if it would work for her like it worked for Fergie and it did and since then our relationship has blossomed into something very meaningful. She's not a cuddly bird by any means but every now and then when she is on my arm she will move herself very close to my body and snuggle in. and when she does this I know it her way of saying Ilove you. She still likes being kissed on her beak everynight and a scritch but that little snuggle once in a while is what makes it all worth while. Oh yea I almost forgot Tyco was 4 years old when I rescued her and I am her 4th owner. I'm sure your bird even though he sat in a pet store for 3 years will still be able to become a wonderful companion. If Tyco can after the hell she has been put through I'm possitive your bird can also. Patients and love and lots of it is the key.<br><br>Post edited by: Tycos_mom, at: 2009/01/01 06:12

[LadyLinda]

This site is confusing, and I just lost a long post because it decided I wasn't registered. I'll try to remember what I said....

 

Thank you for telling me about Tyco. It's encouraging. Four homes in four years is terrible. When I was trying to rehome Reagan - I saw myself as a foster mom when I first took him from the store - a woman who runs a bird sanctuary told me it's better for a bird to go to a breeder than to be in multiple homes. I would imagine that home after home is devastating for these creatures. But when I went to see a breeder with the idea of swapping my bird, and saw all those birds paired up in stark cages, I said: no way is Reagan going there.

 

The new sulfur crested cockatoo is home. We're calling her Angel. She is so sweet, such a dear. Really, the two birds are as different as night and day. I have them with me in the office while I'm working, and already Angel wants to be on me all the time and I have to encourage her to play with her toys. After trying to get Reagan on my hand last night I was bitten again for my efforts.

 

What do these greys really want? I keep hearing about how intelligent they are, and it causes me some anxiety. How do I have a happy bird - especially when you consider his start in life? I read "Alex and Me" over Christmas, and was interested to learn that Alex never tired of chewing, that he liked to chew out openings in cardboard boxes. Well, there's a clue.

 

By the way, I am thinking that perhaps Alex died fairly young because he never had an opportunity to fly. In no way am I being critical of Dr. Irene - it's just a thought.

[MazyAK]

LadyLinda:

Judy andd the others have hit it. Time and patience on your behalf. It can take more than a year to get Reagan out of his(her) shell. I also introduced a new cockatoo into the house with the grey. I started with the cages in sight of each other and gradually moved them closer. Eventually opening both doors and letting the birds decide how to interact. After a 1 year period of this they are now friends and are always calling each other if they are in different rooms visiting. Now when one bird flies to one of the many bird perches and stands around the house the other often heads there also. The Too is bigger but my grey is older and age seems to dominate youth and size here, but I must always watch the youngster as he can get excited and overpower thew grey. When they have arguments the grey always wins but I can never let my guard down.. just relax and give Reagan the opportunities to explore the surroundings.