Bonding??

[Toxifera]

I have a five month old CAG and I am wondering if she might be bonding with my wife instead of me. When she is on my hand she stretches in my wife’s direction when she walks by. She also lets her scratch her neck; she just scolds me when I try. Am I loosing the bonding battle?

[Knight05]

Im by no means an expert but I would say yes. Grey's as I'm sure you know bond to one person, but they can be multi social if you expose them to multiple people at once and don't hog their attention. My grey loves me to death and does everything you described for you're wife towards me. It is alot harder to win their affection over their chosen person but it IS doable.

 

My roomie for example can give my grey kisses and even get her to step up on most occasions. He cannot on the other hand rub her almost ever, and if she's on him but I'm within 5 feet she will crawl fly or do anything within her power to try and get to me. And if she can't get to me she will give me the parrot stare trying to get my attention to tell me she wants ME to come get her.

 

What works for me in all honesty is the person she leans towards most should be the one encouraging her to be with others. An example being have you're wife move to the side of you and convince her to step up on you're shoulder or hand or w/e works and reinforce her with good bird each time she does. You should be the one giving treats to her when she is more socially interactive. Also spend some time talking to him/her 1v1 when you're wife is not around let her know you are a cool dude too and not just a third wheel.

 

It does take time and it's not perfect or easy thing in most cases but if you have the time and the determination she WILL come to trust and want to be with you more. Just don't turn it into a custody battle between you and you're wife play with her together. But know in you're mind you just might not be #1 to her maybe for a day or week possibley ever but that doesn't mean you can't share an equal role.

[Toxifera]

Wow, thank you for the reply. She does let me scratch her through the cage bars. So maybe she is still trying to decide. I didn’t choose the proper word. I shouldn’t have used battle.

She doesn’t react the way that your gray does trying to get to you, so maybe I still have a chance.

[Rue]

Our CAG obviously prefers my husband. And he's nice to her, but he doesn't want a bird.

 

If my husband is in the room with me, I'm persona non grata. But if he's not around, our CAG is fine with me. Since he's gone for work so often, she really doesn't have much choice, since the kids are scared of her (she bites them - one of the issues we're working on).

 

My point is, even if you're not her favourite, you can still have a happy relationship with her.