Advice PLZ

[Jadewolf32]

OK Shadow just turned 5 months yesterday. Now I see a issue that I need to correct NOW. Shadow is starting to scream. First it started when my husband would come home from work, I am Shadow's favorite, but when Eddie would come home we would talk and Shadow would start trying to get my attention, low whistles, throwing things to the floor and so on, and it would be only when Eddie and I talked to each other, during the day Shadow is fine, he will contact call me if he can not see me but he is good, it is now starting to be ALL weekend when my husband is home, if I give my husband any attention Shadow starts screaming and will not stop, if I walk away from Eddie or Eddie leaves the room he is fine, but it has now gone from that to even when I go into the kitchen to cook, there he goes again, or if I call my dogs, Shadow seems to be becoming VERY jelouse of anyone or anything I do. How do I stop it NOW while he is still young? I have tried the ignoring, I have tried putting back into the cage, i have tried the covering the cage, I have tried the " stink eye "look with a stern no, he gets louder, now my husband is feeling like he is competing with my bird and he cant watch the football game with me because Shadow will not shut up and I will not have him on me because that will reinforce this bad habit. I love that he loves me so much but damn he is not type! I need my husband for some things.... There he goes, i walked out to kiss Eddie before he left just now and Shadow is mad, its getting louder and louder. ITS DRIVING ME NUTS. Eddie has tried giving him attention, but he will fly off him and come running to find me, (I thought that was cute at first ) PLZ any advice?

[kitt79]

The ignoring only works if you go at it full out. By that I mean, Shadow gets absolutely NO attention until he is quiet again. It may seem like that won't happen, but it will. If you just wait a while and then he gets attention, he's learning that he just has to keep trying long enough.

 

I had some trouble with Starbuck for a while there -- she would scream her head off in the morning. I always ignored her until she was quiet for at least 30 seconds. (In fact, if I was in the room I'd walk out and close the door if she was screaming until she stopped.) It wasn't doing any good, and I was confounded... until I found out that my dear husband, who was not working at the time, would go in and check on her when she screamed long enough when I wasn't there.

 

I was not amused. He got a fast lesson on behavior.

 

Now neither of us enter the room in the morning unless she is quiet/has been quiet long enough. She does make noise while we're in the room, but it's all normal calls and vocalizations, no screaming. We completely ignore any sound we hate, and though it took several months, we've eliminated the worst sound, and rarely get our next least favorite anymore. (Ignore means NO reaction. No looking, no talking, no change in typing speed, no blinking.) It will be easier if you can actually walk out of the room and leave until she's quiet -- less temptation to react.

[Dave007]

My advice would be to have your bird with Eddie more than before. If your grey screams at him, let him deal with the bird. Sometimes, a habit develops which is unintentional. The bird gets a little older and is very aware of where all the everyday attention came from when he first arrived in the house. sometimes, one person deals with the bird and all the situations that go on with the bird by themselves. It's no one's fault. Your husband is at work. When he appears, the grey's attention is focused on that intrusion. He can't do anything more than scream. You yourself said that it started mildly and increased as time went on. Your grey's attention was also aimed at the dog who needed your attention. Again, the screaming starts. many people aren't aware of this but greys are quite well known for their intense jealousy concerning people, other animals, other attention getters. I believe that your bird is going through an adjustment period because of it age. He's a baby and has had loads of attention from you. No insult here but what's going on is that your bird is becoming a brat and trying to take over. Many greys try to do that. It's a common thing with them. Very young children do the same thing. They carry on. They're obstinate and basically pains in the ass when they don't get their way. many people give in to the kids to shut them up. Others are more stern and let the kids carry until they see that nothing is gained. In the past if you've been on grey boards, you must have heard that greys have the intelligence of a 3 to 5 yr old kid and it is a proven fact. That should tell you something right there.

I personally think that your husband has to start dealing with the problems with the bird one on one. You can't be the problem solver all the time. You can't be playing interference all the time. Antything your husband will start doing with the bird right now in order to get a change going will take time. Your husband is part of the family and the bird needs to accept that. Let your husband handle some of the difficult things that have to be done. This is why early socialization is so very important when a grey first comes home to a new house. The whole family must be involved in as many things concerning the bird whether it be the happy side such as treat giving or the not so happy side such as cleaning. Each person should get as much of a physical relationship as possible from the get go.<br><br>Post edited by: Dave007, at: 2008/10/13 00:15