Joy in pain

[Tulip518]

I know i've only had my CAG for a week but i'm alreay feeling down. See I live with my aunt and i'm home with my Ozzy more than she is. When it's just me and him he's awesome we play and he gets really close to me...But once she comes home he fluffs up has one leg up(not all the time) and starts biting me real hard, and then she laughs. I know she doesn't mean it but she starts laughing and then comes right up and tells him to step up and he doesn't bite her...He's fine and content with me until she's there....and then she jokes about it with everyone:( Making me feel like crap...I don't blame ozzy for this and by no means mad or dissappointed, I mainly need advice on how to talk to her about it...<br><br>Post edited by: Tulip518, at: 2008/05/23 17:18

[judygram]

I think Ozzy sees this as kind of a game, he is being entertained by her reaction to his biting you and then her laughing about it. You need to talk to your aunt about this so she can stop doing this for Ozzy will continue to do it for the reaction he is getting out of it.

 

Don't feel bad because of it for she is the one reinforcing bad behavior and not you. Why don't you have her read some of the threads here for some information about how to stop this type of behavior.

[lovemyGreys]

you really need to approach your aunt & tell her this is not acceptable ,laughing at the biting is only reinforcing bad behaviour ,long term this may affect Ozzy's behaviour,any from of biting should be discouraged.A quiet word in her ear

[Nychsa]

Hi, in addition to letting your aunt know this is not acceptable, when Ozzie bites, I would put my finger up in front of his beak, make a stern face (they can read your facial expressions) and say firmly "No bite!" and then immediately after that I would muster up as much confidence as possible and firmly tell him to "step up".

 

When Bella was staying with my daughter she picked up some bad habits which I had to immediately deal with once she came back home and I found this to work quite well. She had to see I didn't think it was cute or funny.

 

Cheers!

Terri

[Tulip518]

I do tell him Not nice sternly....My aunt interjects with "he's just a baby....leave him alone he doesn't like you"....I know he does like me and like I said it's only been a week since i've had him! I want him to get as much exposure to as many people I come into contact with myself so he is social but well bottom line is my i'm the one who gets picked on in the family because I am the only animal obessed one....so they find the Humor in this. But I love my Ozzy so much already i'm not going to give up on us<br><br>Post edited by: Tulip518, at: 2008/05/23 21:21

[Dave007]

Also tell her that you belong to a african grey board that has many experienced people here. tell her that you found out that what she's doing is gonna be harmful to the bird later on. Tell her to visit here and many here will nicely point out the disadvantages of doing that.

Sometimes, what's going on in your situation is a form of socializing but it's too early to tell. Just one week with the bird. It's good when a bird likes the other members of a family. Just remeember that she thinks it's fun to have a bird like her too so maybe she's just acting a liitle giddy.

[madisimmons]

Nychsa wrote:

Hi, in addition to letting your aunt know this is not acceptable, when Ozzie bites, I would put my finger up in front of his beak, make a stern face (they can read your facial expressions) and say firmly "No bite!" and then immediately after that I would muster up as much confidence as possible and firmly tell him to "step up".

 

When Bella was staying with my daughter she picked up some bad habits which I had to immediately deal with once she came back home and I found this to work quite well. She had to see I didn't think it was cute or funny.

 

Cheers!

Terri

 

So I should be doing this with my newly adopted Grey as well.. when she goes to bite?? I thought I was suppose to ignore the behavior so she wouldn't think of it as a game or that she got me??

[Tycos_mom]

Your aunt is already makeing it a game you must nip this situation in the butt now before it gets worse tell your to stop laughing. That getting bit is nothing to laugh about and tell her to mind her own bussiness the bird is your not hers. If your bird continues this biting thing I would imediatly after the bite put him in his cage for a time out and tell him no biting as your putting him there he won't be thinking that its a very fun game if every time he does it he get locked in his cage for 5 or ten minutes It works really good for birds. You can't hesitate or wait he has to be able to assosiate the bite with being locked up and he will soon stop the bad behavior Pat<br><br>Post edited by: Tycos_mom, at: 2008/05/24 01:04

[danmcq]

Hello Tulip518 and welcome!!

 

You are in a very difficult situation, from what I am reading. Living with your Aunt and family, being considered young and inexperienced by your Aunt is magnifying the issue.

 

I am certain it is frustrating, painful and heart breaking to be treated as the brunt of a joke and inconsiderate attitudes.

 

The others have given expert advice and I can only reinforce the comments of the others and ask that you have your Aunt join this forum so she can talk to others with much more experience than her on Grey behavior and up-bringing.

 

This is a critical time in your Grey's life and will determine how he interacts with others and views the world of humans.

 

It seems you are the wisest at this point in having the sense to search out and find valuable information and advice in relation to your Grey.

 

The Grey is one of the most intelligent Parrots and actually reasons to the point that they display many behaviors you would only expect to see from humans.

 

They analyze every thing in their environment, every sound, every response and then come to conclusions drawn upon the "Cause and Effect" principle. An example of this, is they hear the phone, see you answer it. They put two and two together and pretty soon imitate the phone and expect you to come and get them, as you do the phone. :-)

 

That is just one simplistic example of the Grey's complex and inquisitive personality and mental capabilities, but I think it gets the point across in how your Grey is viewing the present "Cause and Effect" of him biting and your Aunts response.

 

I hope to hear more from you and especially desire to see your Aunt join this Forum. :-)<br><br>Post edited by: danmcq, at: 2008/05/24 15:20

[Acappella]

I'm sorry some of your family aren't supporting you trying to do things the right way. The last time my brother and his family were here I caught him with Dorian saying "s#*!head" over and over again, so he's never going to be alone around Dorian again. I know you don't have this option, so a couple of suggestions.

 

To try to communicate how seriously wrong what she is doing is, give her a few worst case scenarios. Tell her she is interferring with Ozzy's bond with you, and birds that aren't bonded with their caretaker can feel unsafe and develop all sorts of problems. Say they may be baby bites now, but maybe there are some pictures on this or other sites that show how bad an adult bird bite can be, and ask her how she would like it if the bird turned into a biter and she had to feed it one day for you. Tell her how much harder it is to find a new home for a bird that bites or has other behaviour problems, if you ever had to. Tell her a bird with problems loses a great deal of his $ value (I know this doesn't matter to us bird lovers, but different people have different currency they care about)

 

I also encourage her to come to this site to learn exactly how difficult it is to get a bird to un-learn a bad habit. If she won't, print out a few pages of examples and give them to her to read.

 

As far as what to do with Ozzy, bringing your bird up to eye level with you (but not close enough for him to go for your eyes), a very stern, low voiced 'No' plus a sad face, and then putting him into his cage for a birdie time out works well. Don't let your aunt near him during this time out, even it that means standing in front of the cage door with your back to it. If he's decided he prefers her to you for some reason letting him go to her after he bites you will absolutely guarantee that he continues to bite you.

 

Her behaviour is also going to have serious consequences for your relationship with her, this I know from experience. It's good of you not to blame Ozzy in this, and I hope the situation improves. You'll get lots of support here.

[Nychsa]

madisimmons wrote:

Nychsa wrote:

Hi, in addition to letting your aunt know this is not acceptable, when Ozzie bites, I would put my finger up in front of his beak, make a stern face (they can read your facial expressions) and say firmly "No bite!" and then immediately after that I would muster up as much confidence as possible and firmly tell him to "step up".

 

When Bella was staying with my daughter she picked up some bad habits which I had to immediately deal with once she came back home and I found this to work quite well. She had to see I didn't think it was cute or funny.

 

Cheers!

Terri

 

So I should be doing this with my newly adopted Grey as well.. when she goes to bite?? I thought I was suppose to ignore the behavior so she wouldn't think of it as a game or that she got me??

 

Well, the breeders from whom I got my Bella socialized their babies quite well before releasing them to their new homes and they taught them quite early on the "no bite" command. So, I took my ques from them.

 

Bella was never really a biter. It only happened when she was with my daughter for 2 weeks and she realized my daughter would let her have her way if she acted like she was going to bite. Bella being the smart girl that she is figured this could work with me too. So, that is when I reminded her that we don't bite.