Overly affectionate Grey.

[Guest Rheashard0919]

I have a 4 year old gray who is very affectionate. I believe she is a female. She has been that way since I got her at just under 4 months old. She likes to be cuddled, hugged, held just under the chin so she can feel your breath. Her name is Nameliss. Well, after getting in in cuddle position, Nameliss will hook your hand and pull it until she gets an under wing scratch. That scratch may last for seconds or minutes. Then progress to the other wing then the head and so on. This was cute at 4 months but is wearing me out. How can I gently discourage her with out causing a tantrum gray style? Or worse making her think I do not want her affections? I just don't want to have her cuddled under my chin for hours at a time. My first gray was more independent. Cuddle time was for a few minutes in the morning and evening then that was enough. I am stumped. I made the mistake of treating her like him thinking that she 'would out grow it'. Well she hasn't. If I am not careful she will get excited to the point that she will go into 'baby bird' actions. Only now it is more like breeding hen actions. I am stumped. I want her distracted in a positive way before I have talon holes in all my shirts.

[Laurie]

I'm stumped on this one.

I thought greys were supposed to become quite independent at around age 2.

My only suggestion is to aim for a "happy medium" interaction time. I wouldn't shun her altogether, but maybe be a little more insistent each time that the cuddle sessions be made shorter.

Good luck!

[Guest Rheashard0919]

Thanks for the reply. I have only had 2 parrots in my life. Both greys. The first one acted a lot like the text book said he would act. This one acts like a puppy. I did accidently find out that some of her playing behavior is a type of Amazon. So maybe she was raised with a mixed group and is has been impressed upon. Since she is an only child I am stuck. I need to find a way to re channel her behavior before I go nuts. A grey sitting under your chin for what seems like hours at a time is hard to take. It is worse then with my cat or dogs; can't read, knit, crochet, watch TV, get on computer, until Nameliss is done that is.

[Dave007]

You should first start off by stopping the under the wing activity. Whether you realize it or not, you're bordering on raising sexual excitement. If she's 4 yrs old, sexual excitement is very easy to attain on her part and even get more intense as she gets older. The more you do that, the harder it's gonna be to stop. You'll need to wean her away from the behavior that you untentionally created although I doubt you can be totally successful if you desire no physical contact whatsoever. You're lucky to have such a cuddly bird. Keep the petting to the head and neck. If your bird persists in pushing your hand to another area such as under the wings or lower breast, just continue to go back to the head and neck. At one point continually returning to the head will cause a frustrated attitude on her part and she might try to nip because she's not getting her way. That's the time to stop and just sit there with her but not touching her. She'll probably start again and you'll have to restart what you were doing. Eventually, she'll be grateful that she's still getting the head and neck petted. It's a habit that can be lessened but it's totally up to the person to do that. All of this also pertains to males too but females can be much more obstinent at it. Neither males or females should be petted around areas that can get them sexually aroused.

To give another example that's related, although not sexually to what you're going through........

Many people decide to pet their bird's beaks when they're very young. The bird sticks it's tongue out so that it can be touched. Young birds love to have their tongues petted. A person thinks it's cute. The person continues and after a month or two, the bird starts holding the finger with more firmness to keep the finger on the beak and tongue. Eventually, the person feels a little discomfort from the pressure of the beak on the finger. After all, the bird is getting stronger and is learning how to keep that finger there. One day the person who's doing that, decides to stop, the bird continues holding on to the finger, the person pulls the finger and WHAM!, the bird bites into the finger cause he/she is really pissed off that you won't obey his rules which the person originally started.<br><br>Post edited by: Dave007, at: 2008/04/21 03:48

[Guest Rheashard0919]

Intresting. I never realized that. I did find that out with the finger. But my grey used more to keep me in place until the head scratching was done to his statisfaction. I got in the habit of keeping popscicle sticks nearby as a distraction. I have started by accident and inconsistently to do as you suggested with the head scratching. So now I am more motivated to make it a consistencey.