I NEED HELP-behaviors

[tiffanyh]

Hi everyone.

I am struggling with my grey.

 

We have had him for 4 months or so. About six weeks ago he started screaming/shreeking-this kind of screaming the is painful to hear, very high pitched. He also does the noise from a fire alarm that is losing its battery. Problem is ,he goes this CONSTANTLY--all day, every hour.

 

Here is some background. We have two loud children and he yells along with them--that is fine. He seems to enjoy it. He getting feed seed, fruit, veggies, eggs, etc. and has fresh water. He was coming about all day until about a week ago when I could not keep up with the amount of bird feces everywhere. Now he has two cages set up, one in the living room, one in the kitchen. he moves back and forth between the day to where we are. He has toys, music, treats and a soothing waterfall background to listen to when we are not home. Oh, also my mom is my daycare provider so someone is home almost all day everyday.

 

Now. This all started about 6 weeks ago. You cant be in the kitchen with him, you can walk by his cage, you cant talk on the phone, you cant sleep past the sun rising. And it is PAINFUL to hear. It literally hurts when he does it. It did not coicide with the leaving him in his HUGE cage for more hours. It started before that.

 

I read posts and tried ignoring him for about 4 weeks. But now it is driving me batty! I now try to scold him for it, as I would a dog, but obviously it has gotten worse since I am then giving him attention and reinforcing his bad behaviour but I dont know what else to do!

 

I understand parrots are loud and need attention, but he also needs to blend in with our family needs, which seemed to be going very well until recently.

 

ANy advice, besides ignore it, would be SO VERY Appreciated as I am considering calling his previous owner or rehoming him. I hate teo say it, but I dont even want to be around him right now because he hurts!! Although, I sure that is part of the problem.

 

As I write this, it took me 10 minutes, he screamed so many times that I now have a piercing head ache as he is sitting next to me. I cant seem to wait to get out of the house because at least he is not screaming at my job!

 

Please dont bash me! I am writing because i need help and want o make my bird and myself happy and have no idea what to do.

 

Thanks.

[danmcq]

Sorry to hear your having this problem Tiffany. :-(

 

One thing I do know, is if you have now started screaming back and reacting, that's what he wants is any type of attention and he will continue even more so.

 

If you take him out of his cage and let him on your arm or shoulder, does he stop screaming?

 

Also, if the other children in the house are loud and perhaps screaming at him or each other, he could have learned this behaviour as "normal" calling techniques for his flock there. They are highly and intelligent and put two and two together based on what they see and hear.

 

Lastly, did anything change six weeks ago at the time you say he started this behaviour?

[judygram]

Tiffany, did you make any changes in the household at the time this behavior started, a lot of the time a change triggers such behaviors? He also might think he has to compete with the two loud children for attention, if it works for them then he figures it will work for him too.

 

I know this is frustrating for you and you responding to his screams is only making it worse, the attention is just causing him to do it more, you are rewarding bad behavior.

 

How much out of cage time does he have every day, maybe he does not get enough time?

 

Please do not consider rehoming him at this time, lets work on trying to find the cause and put a stop to it or at least reduce the amount of it. Some of the other members with more experience than I might have some suggestions and ideas that will help you more than I can. Just hang in there, help is on the way.

[BMustee]

Well, I know you said "don't tell me to ignore it" but that is the ONLY way to brake screamers. When he starts screaming you have to leave the room. Don't look at him, make any indication that he bothered you, just walk away and don't return till the noise has stopped for a minute. I had a Sun that became a screamer because my step mother would yell back at him when I was not home so it got reinforced to scream when he wanted someone to talk to him. It took me a little while to brake it but it happened. I'm not bashing you so please don't take it that way, but when you broke down and started scolding him I'm sure that set back any improvment greatly. Lets say he screams for 30 minutes at a time. When he starts screaming and you leave the room he might start by screaming for 45 minutes, then go to an hour, and so one. If you NEVER break and do not re-enter the room till he is quite it will start to decrease in time, but if one day he screamed for an hour and a half and you walk in while he is still doing it he has just leaned to scream for an hour and a half to get you to come to him. This can be VERY hard but is the only proven way to do it. Also, when he is making a noise that you like, reinforce that. Give him attention, treats, time out with you...anything that he likes. He will begine to associate the "good" noise and start to replace it for attention. Also, the kids screamig and such needs to me minimized. A loud house leads to a loud bird...they learn the volume levels. The key to it all is consistency...all day every day. You can't change the training pattern at all...not even if you have totally lost it and feel like you have to do something else.

[BMustee]

Also, a few side bars. When he starts screaming...EVERYONE must leave the room. Make sure the kids and mom know the rules or else all you efforts are in vain.

 

Like Dan and Judy have also said, figuring out what changed when he started screaming could really help spreeding things up. Think of anything that happened within a 2 week window of the behavior change.

 

Lastly, please don't give up on him. I know it is very hard to deal with him but he needs a hero in his life to take the time and change his behavior. If he doesn't get that he will be doomed to being bounced from one home to another, all the while getting worse and worse. One thing you can do when it is just too loud and you feel like you can't take it is put on a set of ear muffs like machanics and people that work around aircraft wear. You can wear Ipod earbuds under them too so all you would hear would be your fav tunes. You can get them at tool stores. I have a pair that I would wear when I was in the paint booth painting cars because the noise level in there was too much sometimes. If you can't find any in your town I would be willing to mail you mine.

[Nychsa]

Hi,

 

It sure sounds like he's trying to get attention no?

 

Bella, my CAG, mimics the door alarm when I leave the room. That is a logical conculsion for her - when ever I leave, I set the alarm and it beeps. So, she thinks that is my call sign. In turn when ever I walk out of the room, she'll do that beep to call me. But, I dont' react to that. I will however react if she is actually asking me where I am. Then I'll reward her for not making a terrible sound and I'll call her back.

 

She also screams every now and then. I've noticed she does that when she hears other birds outside or she sees the squirrels. I don't react to it. What I do though is when the dogs come in I speak softly to them and she sees them reacting calmly back to me. That seems to cause her to mimic the dog's behavior and quiet down. Sometimes I think she is calibrating her voice, trying to mimic something and it comes out terribly at times! But, I don't react to it, so she doesn't get any attention from that kind of sound.

 

However, I'm not sure I understood something entirely in your post - you're not letting him out of his cages at all any more? I know you mention you're alternating him between two cages, but if I understood your post correctly - you're not letting him out because of the clean up?

 

I may have misunderstood what you wrote, but in the event I did understand correctly - I would think keeping him in cages would cause the propblem to get worse.

 

My understanding is African Greys need at least 3 hours/day out of their cages and they need direct interaction with their human for at least 45 minutes/day and peripheral interaction (i.e. being a part of the family) for the rest of the time. What kind of activities do you have for him that he enjoys with you?

 

Cheers!

Terri

[tiffanyh]

Thank you for the quick and kind replies. I am suprised how much better and determined they make me feel.

 

Nothing really changed around 6 weeks ago....although apparently to him it did.

 

Danmcq--he does stop screaming when taken out and put on my shoulder. THe kids dont every scream at him, they just run around playing and yelling. But I see what you mean.

 

I understand the screaming with the kids. I really dont mind it but this scream is a bit different than the one he does with them. I never really thought of him seeing that as our call and trying it out for attention....makes sense.

 

He does come out about 3-5 hours daily. Originally he was out ALL day on top of his cage. I am going to work it out so he comes out again in an enviroment I can clean up after more efficently. HE definatley enjoys that more.

 

Sometime I guess I feel like everything needs me-and it can be overwhelming. He was a rescue thrown at me from a sick friend. I had always wanted one but had planned on waiting til a less hectic time.

 

What about a time out of sorts too? I have considered putting a cage in our bedroom for when he gets way to loud. I need to be able to anwer the phone occasionally or talk occasionally and he screams loud enough now that that is impossible. Has anyone ever tried that--just moving him for 30 minutes or so during his loud times---or covering him briefly?? Will this help to show him he gets removed from what he enjoys when he does an undesired behavior??

 

I really want this to work .Consistency is hard when you have two kids, work and everyday is a bit different but I think he is smart enough to have the daily adjustments once we get back on track. It was GREAT for a while.

 

PLease keep the ideas coming!! I REALLY NEED IT!<br><br>Post edited by: tiffanyh, at: 2008/02/05 18:43

[BMustee]

I tried the covering thing when my Sun started screaming and it is only temperary and just added to the problem. Walking over to the bird and moving it can also be seen as a reward...they think "You came and saw me, even if it was to just move me."

 

 

I know how you feel with everything going on at once, I feel the same way many days and want to just crawl under a rock and never come out! I'm very glad that you feel more impowered after reading our posts.

[Nychsa]

Hi there,

 

Kids, animals and everything else can be an overwhelming feeling. "Mom" usually is the center of everyone's universe and sometimes the universe doesn't understand that we'd like to have someone else take on that roll sometimes. Hang in there - it will get better.

 

I think the change you mentioned may be that he was out all the time and now he has designated times that he's out. Maybe he's yelling about that? I'm just guess that this seems like a big change to him.

 

I've been amazed at how routine oriented my birds are. They're "out time" is firs thing in the morning between 6:30 am and 10 am. Both my CAG and my conure go into their cages themselves right around 9:50ish! And they start playing with their toys in their cages, and messing with their treats in there. Isn't that amazing?

 

They come back out when I get home around 5ish in the evening and then my CAG stays out with me until around 10 pm and my conure puts himself to bed around 8:30 pm! Isn't that amazing? They have their routine and that is it!

 

So, I'm wondering if yours had a routine too of being out for a certain duration and now he is having to adjust to a new routine?

 

Cheers!

Terri