LovinAlex Posted January 4, 2008 Share Posted January 4, 2008 I've had Alex for about 2 months now. He is a really good boy but lately he's been very clingy. He only wants to be held by me. If anyone else is holding him and I am in sight he crouches and does all he can to get to me. He'll even go as far as flying down onto the floor and walking over to where I am to climb up my leg. If I walk by his cage he jumps onto my shoulder and refuses to get back on his playtop. He's becoming my velcro bird in every way. He's only 7 months old so I want to try to stop this behavior before it gets worse. Any suggestions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nevjoe Posted January 4, 2008 Share Posted January 4, 2008 First of all, Welcome to the forum. Are you with him all day long? Is there anyone else living with Alex? How much is Alex out of his cage daily? Where does he sleep? How often does he get treats? and so on. The more you write the more members can help you and Alex. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BMustee Posted January 4, 2008 Share Posted January 4, 2008 I too have delt with a Velcro bird. What you need to do is every time he comes to you without your permission put him right back where he came from. Like if he jumped off the playstand on to you then put him right back on. It can be hard when your bird refuses to stay and you've been up and down 20 times in a row but in time your grey will learn. You have to be consistant though...your grey will learn that if he just does it 21 times you will give in...so no backing down once you start. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danmcq Posted January 4, 2008 Share Posted January 4, 2008 Awww, he loves you so much. :-) Dayo is that way with Kim in the evenings when sitting with us in the living room. he will run across the couch to just nuzzle with her and then fluff up and start preening himself. But, as others have said, yours is a little out of control and needs to be put back to the play-stand. But, there is nothing wrong at all with setting aside of day or evening that you are all his for an hour or two. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovinAlex Posted January 4, 2008 Author Share Posted January 4, 2008 Thank you all for your replies. In response to nevjoe: I work from 9-5 during the week but I have him with me in the mornings while I'm getting ready for work and then put him back on his cage when I leave. My boyfriend lives with me and he is usually home until about 1 or 2 hours before I get home in the evenings. So Alex is only alone for about 2 hours. When someone is home Alex's cage door is open and he is free to go in and out of the cage as he wants. He usually stays on top of the cage on his playtop unless he gets hungry but he comes right back out when he's finished eating. So besides a few hours he's generally out of his cage most of the day. He sleeps in his cage with the door shut at night so he does not have access to the outside world while we're asleep. As soon as I wake up in the morning I go into the living room and let him out to play or I bring him in my room with me while I'm getting ready. As far as treats go, he doesn't really get any. Not because I don't try to give them but because he's so picky he doesn't eat them. I'll hold one out and he shakes his head no and then turns away. As far as one on one time goes, I sit with him in the evening for awhile and scratch is head (his favorite thing). I also take him everywhere I can so he's really with me a lot. I take him to my parents house and the pet store at least twice a week. So, I guess, in short, I feel like he gets plenty of one on one time. Maybe he gets too much? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chapala Posted January 4, 2008 Share Posted January 4, 2008 I don't think he gets too much attention. Parrots are very social creatures, and are with their mates and/or flock members 24 hours a day. So it is natural for him to want to be with you. It sounds like it would be good to socialize him more with other people, taking it slowly since he is so attached to you and possibly fearful of others. It may be a good idea to pass him to other people just for a minute (no attempts by the others to touch him, just hold), praise him and tell him what a great bird he is, and take him back. Keep repeating whenever you can. He will realize that you are not going to abandon him to this stranger (or your boyfriend), and that you will be right there telling him how good he is. Be patient with him, and consistent with having him go to others for very brief times with lots of praise. Like the others above, I also would not let him jump on your shoulder when you walk by his cage. That should be by invitation. If you place him back on the cage or on a playstand, be sure to come back to him in a few minutes if you can, and pick him up, praising him. In other words, give him attention when he is behaving how you want, not jumping on your shoulder. It's up to you to find the opportunities to praise him and give him attention. If you ignore him, he will continue to want to jump on you even if the result is negative. Good luck, and let us know how it goes with your Grey bird! Reta Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovinAlex Posted January 4, 2008 Author Share Posted January 4, 2008 Thank you everyone. I will make sure to put him back on his playtop when he jumps on my shoulder in the future and praise him when his behavior is good. As far as strangers go, he is good with my boyfriend holding him and scratching him, etc as long as I am not around but if he can see me then he tries to get back to me vs letting Bruce hold him. Same goes with my family, he will allow them to hold him and he will go to them when asked but only long enough to say he did and then he wants back with me. It's just frustrating for example when I'm eating. He wants to be with me and then he'll sit there and preen which means that his dust goes everywhere and I don't want that in my food. I know you're supposed to make them a part of the family during meal time but he is not happy with sitting on his perch in view of me, he has to be on me which leads to feathers and stuff flying about while I'm eating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nevjoe Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 Well it seems you have said a lot more about Alex. The one thing I love about my grey, is that he is so loveable to me. He is ok with others, but I'm his guy. I use to eat it up like candy, but I have learned for HIS sake to change things. I want to hold him the whole day with my other birds, but we now have rules. Don't get me wrong, I am a sucker when he looks so sad if I don't get him. He would always fly over to me, but his wings are cliped to the 8th feather now. He flys to the ground now, and want up, so instead right back to the perch he went. All is much better now because I bit my lip and in a week he got the message. You are the boss not the slave, and in time he will know. We do have plenty of times we hang together, but it is when I say so. (At Night, before bed) Good luck Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chapala Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 Now I would not let my birds interfere with my dinner! I know others do this willingly though, so it all depends on what you want. The birds do not sit on the table with us - tried that and it is a mess. Occasionally they sit on a stand next to the table, but usually I feed them in their cages, and they eat when we eat, but at their own place. You are in charge, and if something isn't working for you, you need to make changes. Reta Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovinAlex Posted January 5, 2008 Author Share Posted January 5, 2008 Ok, so what I've gathered is basically that I need to just ignore his attempts to be with me when I feel it's excessive, no matter how cute it is. I just want to make sure that I'm not damaging is ego per se. I know that Grey's are very sensitive and can hold grudges and I don't want to make him feel unwanted in any way. Is there a possibility that could happen? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Your story sounds so much like mine! I didn't even want a bird - I agreed to let my husband and son get it, and the little guy chose me as the one in the family he wants to be with! Because I'm a total pushover, I have never done anything to discourage it. In fact, I kinda like to brag about it. My husband is the one taking more action in this department. He will push the issue and insist on Klaus spending time with him. If I REALLY need Klaus off me, I can get him to go in or on his cage, or to someone else. I do give him lots of praise when he cooperates. I'm not sure about long-term psychological impact, but I think if you're consistent in the amount of attention you give him, he should be fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaq Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 I am in the same situation. Charlie will call out, i will answer but if i dont go to him, he will seek me out and either sit on my foot or start climbing up my leg. if i go upstairs he will pace at the bottom and call out persistently till i come back down and fetch him. i also work 9-5, but i involve him in all my activities when i am at home. the only time i have a problem with this clinginess is when i am cooking cos i am afraid of him getting hurt. so i have learnt to now keep him in the kitchen, but on the window sill - out of harms way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
judygram Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Awww these stories of how these birds want to be with their chosen ones are so heartwarming to hear, doesn't it just make you all soft inside, enjoy it for not evenyone has that kind of relationship with their grey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
siobha9 Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 We too have a clingy bird. Oisin is so attached to my husband his nickname is Cling-On! A word of warning though. Every time my husband passes Oisin, he flies over to be on him. But once my husband was in a hurry and walked through the room and out the back door. Oisin was so quick and flew through the door too. Luckily he landed on my husband who promptly turned around and ran back into the house, with Oisin still securely attached!! Now we do EVERYTHING in our power to discourage him from flying to us when the mood takes him. Siobhan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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