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How did you handle family with your birds?


Christina

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How do you handle the family that comes into town and knows nothing about birds? I like to have our birds out while strangers come into the house (stranger to them not to me!:ohmy: ) but sometimes its just such a pain trying to educate these people on bird behavior. They want to compare a bird to a dog. My mom was actually stalking poor Finnigan, I had to tell to stop where she was, don't move another inch after that bird (this is after Finni flew away from her). I tried to explain why you don't do that, but then it was just a "you spoil your birds...You need to discipline them." Blah blah. Everyone seems to want to touch the birds, but no one wants to learn anything about them. What gives? I do want my birds to be able to go to strangers, or at the least, be comfortable in their own home when people they don't know are around. But, sometimes, it stresses me out. Maybe its just my family. What are your thoughts? How did you handle it?

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Hi Christina,

 

Yes, non-parrot owning visitors must be educated on how to interact (if allowed at all) and what NOT to do, before introducing them to your Parrots.

 

People just do not understand Parrots if they have not been around them. They think of them as another pet like a Dog or a Cat that they have kidded, poked fun at and perhaps even terrorized with what they think is funny.

 

You just experienced what most of us Parrot owners have. People just think we are crazy for the way we treat and protect our Parrots. They do not understand their intelligence or sensitiveness to people poking at them, waving their arms at them or getting in there face saying Polly want a cracker!! UGH - So I think we all know what you mean.

 

If I have Dayo out at some point when company is here, I either hold him on my shoulder or Arm and tell the guest's how they may interact with him.

 

I have family coming over at various times of every week and they have all been taught the "Way of the Parrot". If one of my Parrots do not want to interact, they know they need to just back off and let them be. To hell with the Parrot might bite them, they have to watch out for ME :evil:

 

Hope this helps...your not alone :-)<br><br>Post edited by: danmcq, at: 2007/12/26 21:26

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I let one visting me know it is Chico's house 1st and if they can't listen they can get out...He is not a TV he speacks when he wants to and can NOT be turned on for thier entertainment. But luky me I con for a parrot loving family my mom and 3 of my aunts have birds so everybody basicly knows that they rule the roost

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I have people non stop come into the pet store that think birds can be picked up and played with like puppies. I normally will give one chance for people to "prove" themselves if they think they are such experts and normally one of three things happen. One, they can't "handle" the bird and it ends up going to the floor...at that point if they are not really on the market for a parrot they lost all handling privlages. Two, they pick up the pick pocket macaws after being warned and end up loosing buttons and/or watch parts. That normally gets people to leave them alone. Or Three, the person gets bit. Normally not too hard but the way I look at it is there are signs that say ask for assistance and you must have done something to deserve it. LOL. With Elmo he will pretty much pick who he trusts whn it comes to new people and normally does very well...but then again most people he interacts with are bird people as well.

 

I would tell your guests "if you want to hold him you must...yada yada yada...or you WILL get bit." People that don't really want to learn about birds normally won't want to hold them after hearing that.

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It's hard for me to remember sometimes that not all people love and respect animals the same way I do. My husband is a farm boy, so we have very different ideas about the purpose of animals, but he is coming around and is very excited about our new CAG (who will be here in 24 days...YAY!!!)

Learning how to educate people about how to handle him/her will be a challenge, but all of your tips have helped. :)

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For the most part, my visitors (with the exception of children) are good with Nikko. If they are interested in holding her, I will pick her up and then ask her to step up on their hand. One of my dad's friends was sooooo good with her. As far as I know, he had never been around birds. But when he held her, he talked softly and explained everything to her (like he told her he was going to take his glasses off so he could get a better look at how beautiful she was :). He was a complete natural.

 

My problems lie mainly with children. I don't know how many times I told my nephew, "Stop that," or "Don't do that," when he would do things like poke at Nikko with an object or shake her gym. Apparently, he has long forgotten the time when he pulled my conure's tail and Jesse latched onto his tender child flesh (it was mainly my brother's fault, since my brother often pulled Jesse's tail to tease him :angry:).

 

I do have one other problem with adults. When I take Nikko out in her travel cage, people seem to be compelled to stick their fingers in her cage :ohmy:! Just what is going through their minds? Do they think she's going to nuzzle them or lick their fingers?

 

Also, I often share the story about how Nikko bit my mom (a person Nikko absolutely adores)for no apparent reason, causing major bloodletting and a bit of nerve damage (her finger was numb for a long time). I also let people know that she is wild, not domesticated, and that she has the temperament of a 2 year old child.

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I agree with everything everyone said. It's sooo exasperating to have to repeat the same warnings all the time, and to the SAME people! Jeeze, people, leave the bird alone. :angry: My husband uses the same technic as you Danmcq...he just holds Loki (B&G) all the time. Finnigan is more independent and would like to have to time on her net and stand, I let her, but had to keep going outside to shoo people away. These are adults too! I guess everyone is enamored with birds. I can't blame them, I just wish they would take more time to listen and learn about the animal instead of tuning me out when I'm trying to explain. Oh, well, I was thinking of making a pamplet that everyone had to read before being allowed to interact with the bird. Boy would they think I fell off the turnip truck then!:laugh:

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Well I am very protective. I usually don't let my birds out when people come over, especially more than a few people. CAGs can get nervous in new situations, they are shy by nature. If it's just one person alone who has been over numerous times and the bird recognises them I might let her out after a time so she (Buddi) has a chance to assess things. Eg, Buddi will waive hi with her right hand if she likes them and remembers them, and she'll bob her head up and down. At that point I may take her out while they're visiting, but not if anyone is coming and going out the external doors, and only for a short time.

 

I can see where you might blame your family but you are the one who left your bird out, right? So-- what I am saying to you gently is, you could have known better, right? I just think we really must put the birds' best interst first since we are their only advocate, and they must trust us. I feel like you may have put your little birdie in an awkward situation that could have been avoided. I always try to think in terms of whats best for my bird, rather than whether the visitors want to see the birds. See?

Actually, there have been times when I even put them in the other room (the birds-not the people) in their sleeping or travel cage to avoid upsetting them.

 

If you don't have an alternate cage may I suggest you invest in one during the holiday sales? As an alternative, you may just cover the cage in a circumstance like that so the visitor won't go over and get too close and the bird needs to feel protected, he has something to hide behind. At least until after the visitors arrive and the bird has a chance to adjust to the new voices and activity. Then I'd take the cover off but tell people to stay five feet clear of the cage. I too have experience the novice visitor who wants to give my bird a nut, but sticks their entire finger in there and gets nipped and then complains about it, when the skin wasn't even broken.

 

Good Luck! birdmom;) ;)

 

Post edited by: birdmom, at: 2007/12/28 13:20<br><br>Post edited by: birdmom, at: 2007/12/28 13:24

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I thought about putting her away, but truthfully, I don't want to. I want her to be able to handle different people and different situations. I don't want to make her so that any change in her life will bring about a panic situation...if that makes sense. However, I do agree, if its a situation where she doesn't seem to be able to settle down, then yes, I do agree, removing her to her room is the best thing. She and Loki have their own room, so its not a problem to take them somewhere quiet where other people are not around them, if she can't get any relief. However, I did run interference for her and she seemed to settle down. :)

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Putting Nikko in her room when we have visitors isn't a good option with me. She will fuss and fuss and fuss because she wants to be where the action is. She seems to enjoy it when people come over (even though she does act a little shy with direct attention). When my aunt and uncle visited for the first time, she even cried when they left. I guess she had already accepted them as new flock members.

 

Even though the children were pests, Nikko was very tolerant. When my nephew poked at her with something, she gave him a "WTF are you doing?" look, but didn't lunge or bite.

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In short , we must respect and protect the security of our birds over people when new humans are introduced to their environment. The bird should be locked in cage for their own good feeling of security and gradually worked into interaction with other humans. Grey can be very selective on who they choose to like or not. We can't force anyone on them. Patience and time will allow the bird to adjust.

Bruce & Mazy

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My birds all have their own "Room" however I have a manzanita tree that doesn't leave the living room that is for Red, and when anyone comes ove rshe just sits tere chills out and watches us. The rest of my birds are welcome to join me on the couch. Most of my family that comes over know I have birds and don't care to touch them or attempt to hold them which is nice. I think I've lucked out, everyone is very respectful of and my babies as they know I would beat the snot out of them if they set me off!

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