gaah (holds head) sooo confused

[TinyTimneh]

hey guys, srry i haven't posted 4 ever, life's been.. well u know how it is.

 

good news, took jacko to the vet, and surprise, he weighed in at 347 grams. she said he was in fantastic physical condition and honestly told me that she had no reason to put him thru all the blood testing etc and that his picking was probably behavioural.

 

got a new cage 2 for both of them (avian adventures double vista cage), and altho it's smaller than what he's used to he's plucking less and seems much more active and comfortable in his new home. needless to say, i'm thrilled! :woohoo:

 

that said, i'm confused. jacko's suddenly went from being decently sweet and tame to running from me (he still loves head scratches but runs away if i say 'up!' or go to touch him). now's there's two schools of thought here too, nurturing guidance a la sally blanchard and don't make him do anything he doesn't want to do.

 

how can i regain his trust/build it without turning him into a little spoiled brat and being a little tyrant? after all, he's eight years old now and plently capable of being a little !@#$% and deciding that he's the one in control....

any tips?

ps. i know i'm never supposed to be agressive but how in the world are you supposed to 'push your hand into his belly and get him to step up even if he doesn't want to' etc without seeming mean on the parrot's part? seems that it he sqwaks and takes off i should back off but then again it just reinforces the pattern and doesn't solve the problem...

[Guest briansmum]

hm.. well his age suggests no reason for a problem. however i wonder if the fact that he is feeling better in himself has triggerd a mischevious streak.

 

well whatever the reason you do need to maintain your dominance. and stepping up is one of the main ways of doing that. you can be dominant with out being agressive. pushing on their chest untill they step up, or taking one of their feet and gently lifting them until the other one follows, while repeating "step up" are good ways of doing this.

 

it really does sound to me like he's just feeling 100% and is testing some of that energy

[TinyTimneh]

thanx, i'll try it (i know WHAt i have to do, it's just applying it!) he's just really nervous and shaky around me, (even when he bows his head for skritches he's usually pretty tense) although he clearly likes me (runs over for skritches when he is in his cage if i offer my finger thru the bars or if i'm not really paying attention or if i'm sitting on the floor whistling to him while reading a book and not really making eye contact he will climb down and waddle towards me as long as i don't look at him) but yes, i'm very happy with his new happy sense of self, now just if i could make him a little more trusting/tame!

[lovemyGreys]

Beccy has given great advice just keep at it,it seems like he is just pushing his boundaries a little,make sure he knows whos the boss.

[judygram]

They are exactly like small children, they will push you to see how far you will take it and what they can get away with, but you need to let them know you are in control and you won't have as many problems, hopefully. Just like kids, they love to push your buttons.

[chapala]

You say that he seems nervous around you, and that you want to regain his trust. Forcing him to do anything will not lead to trust. He doesn't sound to me like he's being bratty or "testing his limits", but that for some reason he seems to be unsure around you. I would recommend hand-feeding him treats leading to the step up for a reward of a treat. Making everything positive will calm and reassure him. Forcing the step-up at this point seems counter-productive to me.

Reta

 

I'm editing to add that most times I give Kali, my Grey, the option of stepping up or not, except of course when he must step up for example to go back in the cage when I'm leaving. Please take a look at this article by Steve Martin, very well known parrot behaviorist and trainer, on positive training for parrots.

http://www.naturalencounters.com/trainingEducationParrots.html<br><br>Post edited by: chapala, at: 2007/12/04 22:34

[TinyTimneh]

well thanx, Jacko's doing ok, (usually steps up on his own from inside the cage) but i just don't feel that connection, that level of interactive-ness that i want so desperately, that level of trust, he likes me, but i just want a bird that's a little more engaged. now granted i love the fact that he's happy to waddle around and explore every inch of the room instead of constantly yammering for my attention i'd really like a bird i can hang out with and playgames with rather than one who takes off on me and seems to always feel under threat. now i know that I can't have my cake and eat it too lol but any ideas?

[chapala]

You know I think mature male Greys just are not as cuddly as they were when younger. At least that's what I've heard from others, and that's been my experience with Kali. He loves to be near me, have his head scratched when he wants it, and is cooperative about being moved around, etc. But, he has changed since he's grown up, more independent I would say.

 

Also, I don't think anyone above mentioned stick training. Very handy for your parrot to be familiar with stepping up to a perch or stick, especially at any time he might be feeling a little persnickety. Pushing an uncooperative parrot for a step-up on the hand can lead to a bite at least with some parrots, so there are times when a stick is very useful. Also works well for the husband when I'm gone!

Reta

[danmcq]

I think Chapalla (Reta) hit the nail on the head.

 

Dayo, now 8 Months old. Is no longer the little panting baby wanting food, security and constant attention. As he matures, I see a change similar to that of a human child. They become "Aware of Self' and realize they have the ability to pick and choose.

 

Thus, there becomes a time for everything. A time to wake, a time to eat, a time to play, a time to explore, a time to snuggle and scratch and a time to "leave me the hell alone".

 

An example would be; If Dayo is sitting on his play-stand happily preening away or chewing it to slivers of wood. If I approach and just thrust my hand forward for him to step up. One of two things happen; He steps up or he reaches quickly down and gives a quick, firm nip letting me know he doesn't want to step up. :-)

 

He is becoming more independent and sure of himself, which is natural and healthy. It is sad to see the cute snuggle-bunny baby grow into a teen, but it is the way of all creation.

 

It is also wonderful to see them exchange the clinging to us for attention and security, to confidence, self mobility and personality of who they are. The magnificent Congo Grey in all it's glory, for which it was destined to become.

 

It think we all need to respect their individualism, personality, likes and dis-likes and give them their space to be who they are, not who we want them to be. :-)

 

Just love them unconditionally, for who they are.

[chapala]

I agree totally Dan, and that describes my grown-up Kali. He is confident and independent, and I respect that. I find my new adult male Mexican Parrotlet (given to me 7 weeks ago) likes much more hands-on attention than Kali. But Kali the wonderful Grey bird loves to watch me, have conversations, and be near me. Just not the amount of cuddling as when he was younger.

Reta

[TinyTimneh]

yeah, you know, i think it may just have been the vet experience (to my knowledge, he'd never been before i got him), almost a year later he's back to his old self. he's muttering and garbling like a crazy bird lol (he's so cute, he butts in in my conversation and will laugh if someone tells a joke or laughs, even on tv). as for stick training, (because of his past?) he is terrified of handheld perches so this is counterproductive. however, hey, i've got a grey that steps up 85% percent of the time, willingly and from inside his cage to boot *knocks on wood*. not many parrot owners can say the same.

when he gets testy or stubborn, (does happen, but not too often) i use the 'distraction technique' and hold a piece of cardboard in 'the bite zone' and present my other hand and say 'up' (or, just pull my sleeve over my hand, seems to change his mind about biting). then, much praise and i'll ladder him a few times just to give him some positive reinforcement.