Turkey in a Bag

[krutsingd]

HI everyone! I'm getting ready for Thanksgiving and was wondering if anyone else had heard that cooking your Turkey, in one of those bags, in the oven would set off toxic fumes. Apparently there is a chemical within the bag. ??? Anyway, I wanted to get my facts straight and prevent a Holiday tragedy. Let me know what you know. Thanks!!

[Tycos_mom]

Hi yes I heard that also if I were you I would'nt take the chance I heard that its when it reaches a certain tempeture but I have 4 birds in my house and there is no way I'm going to take any kind of chance of killing my fids accidently I'll cook my turkey the old fashion way least that way I know that we'll all have a Merry Christmas without any tragitys.

[BMustee]

I won't risk it. I plan on cooking the Turkey with foil...and not the new fangled kinds that are non-stick, just old school foil.

[krutsingd]

Thanks! It's good to know that I'm getting accurate information. I don't mind cooking the turkey withtout the bag.

[judygram]

I'm not cooking a turkey, so I don't have to worry, wouldn't use one of those bags anyways, my daughter has the honors of doing the turkey dinner for Thanksgiving.

[Dave007]

Ingredients:

 

One turkey

Corn pudding

Green beans

Stuffing

Sweet potatoes

Mashed potatoes with gravy

Cranberry sauce

Hot rolls

Relish tray

Pumpkin pie

Whipped cream

Hot coffee

Get up early in the morning & have a cup of coffee. It's going to be a long day, so place your Parrot on a perch nearby to keep you company while you prepare the meal.

 

Remove Parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.

 

Prepare stuffing, and remove Parrot from edge of stuffing bowl and return him to perch.

 

Stuff turkey & place it in the roasting pan, and remove Parrot from edge of pan and return him to perch. Have another cup of coffee to steady your nerves.

 

Remove Parrot's head from turkey cavity and return him to perch, and restuff the turkey.

 

Prepare relish tray, and remember to make twice as much so that you'll have a regular size serving after the Parrot has eaten his fill. Remove Parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.

 

Prepare cranberry sauce, discard berries accidentally flung to the floor by Parrot.

 

Peel potatoes, remove Parrot from edge of potato bowl and return him to perch.

 

Arrange sweet potatoes in a pan & cover with brown sugar & mini marshmallows. Remove Parrot from edge of pan and return him to perch. Replace missing marshmallows.

 

Brew another pot of coffee. While it is brewing, clean up the torn filter. Pry coffee bean from Parrot's beak. Have another cup of coffee & remove Parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.

 

When time to serve the meal:

 

Place roasted turkey on a large platter, and cover beak marks with strategically placed sprigs of parsley.

 

Put mashed potatoes into serving bowl, rewhip at last minute to conceal beak marks and claw prints.

 

Place pan of sweet potatoes on sideboard, forget presentation as there's no way to hide the areas of missing marshmallows.

 

Put rolls in decorative basket, remove Parrot from side of basket and return him to perch.

 

Remove beaked rolls, serve what's left.

 

Set a stick of butter out on the counter to soften -- think better and return it to the refrigerator.

 

Wipe down counter to remove mashed potato claw tracks. Remove Parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.

 

Cut the pie into serving slices. Wipe whipped cream off Parrot's beak and place large dollops of remaining whipped cream on pie

slices.

 

Whole slices are then served to guests, beaked-out portions should be reserved for host & hostess.

 

Place Parrot inside cage & lock the door.

 

Sit down to a nice relaxing dinner with your family -- accompanied by plaintive cries of "WANT DINNER!" from the other room.

 

Happy Holidays!!

[judygram]

How did you know I needed a laugh Dave, I can always count on you for a good one, and you don't disappoint.

 

 

{Feel-good-0002006E}

[Tycos_mom]

good one Dave and I'm sure the reason its so funny is because every bird owner can relate. I have a little 11month old Green cheek Conure that loves to sit on my shoulder when I'm cooking and he has his beak in everything it amazes me how fast that little guy can run down my arm grab a quick bite and run back up to my shoulder then I wonder why he's never hungry at dinner time he's allready stuffed himself on a bite of this and a bite of that such a little brat.

Pat

[spookyhurst]

There's also a funny one about wrapping Christmas presents with your bird :laugh:. I can't remember where I saw it though. Maybe Dave has that one too, because there are many lines that say, "Remove bird from box."

[BMustee]

{Feel-good-0002006E}

 

OMG, that it too funny! I'm going to have to print that out and put it on the frig. ROTFLMAO!!!!

 

I'd like to read the one about wrapping presents, because I had one heck of a time with the sun conure...I almost did wrap him in a box!

[judygram]

I can relate to that also, Sunny is into everything when she sits on my shoulder, down the chest to get into whatever I am doing. It amazes me how she hangs on and leans out so far to get a hold of what I am working with, too funny.:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

[lovemyGreys]

{Feel-good-0002006E} Dave you bring a smile to my face

[Guest briansmum]

{Feel-good-0002006E} i am crying with laughter over here! that was so funny dave, thanks for that.

[Guest briansmum]

i found one about present wrapping:

 

Clear large space on table for wrapping present.

Go to closet and collect bag in which present is contained, and shut

door.

Open door and remove bird from closet and put back on stand.

Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.

Go back and remove bird from cupboard, place on stand again.

Go to drawer, and collect transparent sticky tape, ribbons, scissors,

labels, etc...

Lay out presents and wrapping materials on table.

Go back to drawer to get string, remove bird that has been in the

drawer since last visit and collect string, being sure to untangle bird from it and place back in cage this time.

Remove present from bag.

Remove bird from bag.

Open box to check present, remove bird from box, replace present as well as replacing lock on bird cage that bird unlocked.

Lay out paper to determine size to cut.

Try to smooth out paper, realize bird is underneath, unlock cage, actually put bird in cage this time and get back to work.

Cut the paper to size, keeping the cutting line straight.

Throw away first sheet as bird chased the scissors, and tore the

paper.

Cut second sheet of paper to size - by putting bird in the bag the present came in.

Place present on paper.

Lift up edges of paper to seal in present. Wonder why edges don't

reach. Realize bird is between present and paper. Remove bird again.

Place object on paper, to hold in place while tearing transparent

sticky tape.

Spend 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape

from bird while getting the beak of death as tape pulls on feathers. Place band-aids on hands and nose.

Seal paper with sticky tape, making corners as neat as possible.

Look for roll of ribbon. Chase bird down hall in order to retrieve

ribbon.

Try to wrap present with ribbon in a two-directional turn.

Re-roll ribbon and remove paper, which is now torn due to bird's enthusiastic ribbon chase.

Repeat steps 13-20 until you reach last sheet of paper.

Decide to skip steps 13-17 in order to save time and reduce risk of

losing last sheet of paper and any more skin. Retrieve old cardboard box that is the right size for sheet of paper.

Put present in box, and tie down with string.

Remove sting, open box and remove bird.

Put all packing materials in bag with present and head for a room

with a lock.

Once inside locking room, lock door and start to relay out paper

and materials.

Remove bird from box, unlock door, put bird in cage, close

and relock.

Repeat previous step as often as is necessary (until you can hear

bird from outside door)

Lay out last sheet of paper. (This will be difficult in the small area of the toilet, but do your best)

Discover bird has already torn paper. Unlock door go out and hunt through various cupboards, looking for sheet of last year's paper.

Remembering that you haven't got any left because bird helped with

this last year as well

Return to lockable room, lock door, and sit on toilet and try to

make torn sheet of paper look presentable.

Seal box, wrap with paper and repair by very carefully sealing with

sticky tape. Tie up with ribbon and decorate with bows to hide

worst areas.

Label. Sit back and admire your handiwork, congratulate yourself

on completing a difficult job.

Unlock door, and go to kitchen to make drink and feed bird.

Spend 15 minutes looking for bird until coming to obvious conclusion.

Unwrap present, untie box and remove bird.

Go to store and buy a gift bag

[Hannah_Rae]

Back to the cooking bags, you don't use them at high temps, they are for roasting. They don't have teflon or non stick stuff (the glad ones any way), and if they are used at the temps suggested you shouldn't have a problem. I never have. And they work great. Much less clean up.

[Ronda477]

WOW DAVE I have never seen your writings like that but I am still new lol. I laughed and cried lol. I can't wait till mine is like that!

 

Anyway on the bags I agree with Hannah they are for baking and they aren't non stick.

 

I came home one day thank god I still had a house and my animals but the cat had jumped up on the stove which then lead to the ignitor sitting there clicking waiting to be lit by the gas, there was a non-stick skillet sitting on that burner. I think the only thing that saved it from going up into flames was we left a lid on the skillet filled with bacon grease. I walked into a smoked filled house with all smoke alarms going off and opened ever window in the house and in the middle of winter got all fans out of storage and put in windows. It was amazing it didn't kill our Quaker parrot and all dogs and cats! After all the stories I have heard on hear I am very very lucky. Now there is nothing ever left on the stove and we take all knobs off of stove before we leave every day now just to be safe.

 

So I guess in a way it's probably better to be safe than sorry but they do say that it has to get to a temp of 500 degrees before it releases bad toxins in the air. And again that is with non stick and don't think the bags are non stick at least the ones my mother-in-law uses. She has half the turkey stuck to the bag.

 

We aren't doing turkey this year for the first time. We decided to do filet mignon & crab legs. Only because they were on sale :woohoo: And it's just the four of us this year, we will be going to family house for desserts lol.

[danmcq]

Remove Parrot head out of the Turkey Hole....Hahahahahaha ...Dave you are too funny!!

 

Thanks for the good laugh.

 

Beccy - yours was hilarious too, what a way to start the morning...two laughing sessions !! :woohoo: