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Is a grey right for me?


Tyler_111

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Hey new here. Sorry if I am posting in the wrong fourm. I really want a african grey, I have wanted one since I have been real little. Done lots of research but here's the thing I work 10 hrs a day on a 10-4 shift. 10 on 4 off. My girlfriend works 8 hrs a day mom-fri. I own my own home and I have a full 8x10 room I could devote to the grey. Just wondering if you think that my work schedule is too busy? I really want the grey to get the attention it needs

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Hi Tyler, welcome. After reading other threads just before this one, I'm thinking maybe the question really is, "Am I right for a grey?" Other people here are much better qualified to help you with your decision, but I was just wondering. By the By, being owned by a grey is one of the most awesome experiences anyone can have.

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Many people on the forum work, and some work long hours. Before my retirement recently, I was gone for almost 10 hours each day, Monday through Friday. The only advice I can give is from personal experience. My grey is needy, and I think many of them are. What I mean by that is that he was fine with my being gone as long as my world revolved around him when I was home. Now that I am home more, he isn't as "needy," but still requires a lot of my time and attention. When I first got Timber, I found myself turning down social invitations and rearranging my schedule to spend more time with him and make sure he had his out-of-cage time and the attention I felt he needed. After two years, I still do that. It is a big commitment, and one you should give a lot of thought before taking on. That said, it is very rewarding!

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I think you can make it work provided you make the very best use of the time you do have available. Have you had much/any parrot experience before? A grey was my first larger parrot and it has been fantastic beyond my expectation, but I did a year of research and asked lots of questions before taking the plunge. I suggest you pour over the threads here, ask lots of questions, meet greys and grey owners face to face and be sure sure sure that you know what you are getting into. It is amazing....but not for everyone. Just do your homework and don't rush. Welcome!

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A very tough decision. I can't imagine doing on my own. I had two kids totally committed. I work around 50 hours a week. When kids are off from college, they care for her when I'm gone. When kids are gone, I have two babysitters that come in, and help me. Sophie has been bonded to them since she was a babe. Their friends, continue to be her friends. I just hire them to care for her when I'm gone. Nancy

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This is a fine place for your thread, welcome. There are ways to get along with your work schedule. From coming home for lunch to staggering your schedule with your girlfriend's to maximize companionship time. Can part of your ten hour shift be arranged before dawn? A question to ask is if you would be okay if your grey chooses your girlfriend as the favorite and you are 'second fiddle'? Can you commit to forever, no matter what? Can you afford the annual vet visit? You will likely become as entranced and bewitched by your grey as you would to a child. Will that be acceptable if you have a human child and have to manage a safety zone so small fingers are protected and to divide your time? It's tough to look into the future to see where your life journey will take you. Having a dog is a decade or slightly more, a grey is the rest of your life. It's speaks highly for you to be asking yourself if you are ready and to think of the impact you will have o. Your grey. To you he will be a unique, exquisite, fascinating companion. To him, you will be everything.

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Good questions Tyler_111 and good answers from the members here. As a teacher I work 40+ hr/wk. Like it was mentioned above with other grey situations, Toulouse seems OK as long as when I get home I give him his due. He has gotten use to staying up till 9pm or later and getting up with me in the morning work routine. It probably helps that I am his first owner and I tried to establish a work routine with him from the get go as a baby. Sounds like your heart and mind are in the right place. I'm sure you'll make a good decision.

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Welcome to the Grey family Tyler_111. I was a member here before I got my first grey and the members are great people. If you decide a grey is right for you at this time, remember that you should set a schedule that you are willing to keep. The biggest mistake I believe that people make is to spend oodles of time with their brand new grey at the start and then slowing down. Being over possessive and in the greys face all the time. Then when the grey gets use to that schedule, the owner changes because the grey is no longer a "new toy." Now owner wonders why the grey starts to shriek and demand attention when it is not the grey demanding attention as the grey wondering why he has suddenly been abandoned..... So make sure you treat your grey as you will on a forever basis. Do not over stimulate your grey for a week or two and then slow down. Be consistent, greys expect consistency. They try very hard to understand their new parronts, so you must do the same in return of a great forever relationship.

 

I look forward to watching you and your new grey grow together if you believe the time is now. Enjoy!

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Many people on the forum work, and some work long hours. Before my retirement recently, I was gone for almost 10 hours each day, Monday through Friday. The only advice I can give is from personal experience. My grey is needy, and I think many of them are. What I mean by that is that he was fine with my being gone as long as my world revolved around him when I was home. Now that I am home more, he isn't as "needy," but still requires a lot of my time and attention. When I first got Timber, I found myself turning down social invitations and rearranging my schedule to spend more time with him and make sure he had his out-of-cage time and the attention I felt he needed. After two years, I still do that. It is a big commitment, and one you should give a lot of thought before taking on. That said, it is very rewarding!

 

I will second that. I work about 8 hours a day and have regular time away from Isaac. The thing is to maintain a good routine for him. If yer gone regularly, they get used to the time and definitely wait for you to come home, but they don't sit there and pine for you all day. When I get home....I worship the little guy...especially for the first few minutes being home. I praise him for being my loving little parrot and let him know how beautiful he is and what a wonderful thing he is in my life. The important thing to remember is that they are sentient beings and need love and attention just like any other sentient being. We have to be sensitive to the fact that we have displaced them from nature, and need to replace everything they get in nature in some way or another. Isaac is not with a flock...and he is a flock bird.....this always KILLS me to know. However, I know that I have become his 'flock' and his life-mate. I can never give up or fail my little guy. I often sacrifice doing things away from home to make absolutely sure that I am home with Isaac and letting him have some out time for at least 4 hours a day...and I try to be home at least 6 hours of every day. They want to be loved and feel like they are a part of your life. Make absolutely sure you can provide them with good company and dedication. Please just realize the magnitude of the commitment and be ready to share your life with your new friend. It is a huge responsibility. I have had Isaac for...holy crap.....almost 5 years now!! I didn't even know.

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You've asked a good question and it is apparent that you are really doing your homework. The idea of having a grey and the reality are two different things. That being said, I think many here have been drawn to them from a young age. Perhaps this is an indication of our own personality traits. Some people are attracted to big, some to small, some to brightly colored, and some to these quirky creatures, who are predictable in unpredictable ways.

 

Most people have an attention span of about three years when interested in a new activity or hobby. Many birds are put up for sale or shuffled off after a couple of years. There are many reasons for this that are discussed elsewhere in these forums. Suffice it to say that I have known people who have led busy lives and had healthy, happy birds, and people who have had all the time in the world who have wound up having maladjusted birds because of temperament issues between the human and the bird, or once the shiny wore off the person just provided the bare minimum of food, water, and a clean cage.

 

Only you know you. Are you a person who loves a challenge, devotes time and energy to it and likes to move on to something new? Or are you a person who can spend years delving deeply into something, constantly wanting to do more, learn more? Or are you somewhere inbetween? Do you like to have quiet mornings to sleep in late? Do daily chores make you want to slack off? There are many more questions to ask yourself, and get down and dirty honest with the answers.

 

One suggestion would be to find a parrot refuge or rescue organization in your area and do some volunteering. You will learn a lot, and will learn a lot about yourself, too.

 

Spend time really reading the threads here, they are worth wading through.

 

On a personal note, my first grey and I were together through young single motherhood, wild teenagers in the house, then graduate school and his evental death. He was a mess when he came to live with me and became a loving, gentle fun and happy guy despite my long hours away later in his life. So much depends on you, your temperament, and on the bird.

 

If you commit, commit. Healthy, caring people don't sell their kids just because they are too much work, or too expensive, or because they bite, or because life changes. These sentient beings deserve the same loyalty. Remember, s(he) is not rhe one who asked to be caged. You are the one upon whom both the joys and the burdens fall.

 

My hope is that you will come to the best decision for you and for a bird who is in need of the right companion, whichever direction that decision takes you.

Edited by Inara
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