Can't stand the constant tantrums!!!

[MoSull]

Hello,

 

My name is Mary, and I rescued Elwood, my female Timneh African Grey about 3 years ago when she was 8 years old. When I got her, it was clear that no one ever payed attention to her and she had plucked her feathers quite badly. Her previous owner said that she was mean, but all it took was a little TLC, because she's as sweet as can be, in my opinion. She almost never bites, and is wonderful with new people. However, over the course of the three years I have had her, I have tried EVERYTHING to curb her tantrums, and I just don't know what else to do. The noise she makes sounds something like someone banging two large metal pans together, it is absolutely horrific, and I live in an apartment. I have tried using the "cry it out" method, which seems to make her think that since I'm ignoring her, than she can make all of the terrible noises that she wants. I have tried punishing her, telling her no, blowing at her face (someone told me that was effective), covering her up, pushing her cage into the other room, all of which did work for the short term, but didn't curb the behavior long term. I've tried rewarding her when she makes nice noises, giving her her favorite food when she is behaving well (peanuts!), and honestly, I don't think she understood that at all. I'm at wits end here, and totally at a loss for what else to do. Elwood is such a sweet girl, and I just want a little peace in my home again!

 

Little bit of background, Elwood is fed pellets and various fruits and veggies (and some people food) every day. Her cage is always clean, and I change her water twice a day. She gets weekly showers, and has tons and tons and tons of toys (I just dropped another $150 on toys last week). She is outside of her cage more often than not. I would say that she is out for at least 8 hours a day. She gets kisses and snuggles and to sit on my chest for about an hour a day. Her cage is in the living room, so my fiance and I chat with her all the time.

 

Does anyone have any ideas? I'm losing my mind and I hate that this is straining my relationship with my featherbutt so badly. I would never get rid of her, but I am getting tired of being angry with her, and it's getting difficult not to hold a grudge.

 

 

Thanks so much, and sorry for the tremendously long post. Ask me if there's any more information that you need!

 

Mary

[Dave007]

Hello,

 

My name is Mary, and I rescued Elwood, my female Timneh African Grey about 3 years ago when she was 8 years old. When I got her, it was clear that no one ever payed attention to her and she had plucked her feathers quite badly. Her previous owner said that she was mean, but all it took was a little TLC, because she's as sweet as can be, in my opinion. She almost never bites, and is wonderful with new people. However, over the course of the three years I have had her, I have tried EVERYTHING to curb her tantrums, and I just don't know what else to do. The noise she makes sounds something like someone banging two large metal pans together, it is absolutely horrific, and I live in an apartment. I have tried using the "cry it out" method, which seems to make her think that since I'm ignoring her, than she can make all of the terrible noises that she wants. I have tried punishing her, telling her no, blowing at her face (someone told me that was effective), covering her up, pushing her cage into the other room, all of which did work for the short term, but didn't curb the behavior long term. I've tried rewarding her when she makes nice noises, giving her her favorite food when she is behaving well (peanuts!), and honestly, I don't think she understood that at all. I'm at wits end here, and totally at a loss for what else to do. Elwood is such a sweet girl, and I just want a little peace in my home again!

 

Little bit of background, Elwood is fed pellets and various fruits and veggies (and some people food) every day. Her cage is always clean, and I change her water twice a day. She gets weekly showers, and has tons and tons and tons of toys (I just dropped another $150 on toys last week). She is outside of her cage more often than not. I would say that she is out for at least 8 hours a day. She gets kisses and snuggles and to sit on my chest for about an hour a day. Her cage is in the living room, so my fiance and I chat with her all the time.

 

Does anyone have any ideas? I'm losing my mind and I hate that this is straining my relationship with my featherbutt so badly. I would never get rid of her, but I am getting tired of being angry with her, and it's getting difficult not to hold a grudge.

 

 

Thanks so much, and sorry for the tremendously long post. Ask me if there's any more information that you need!

 

Mary

 

Hi

Well, I see that you've tried most everything with no good results. There's a chance that your bird had this type of habit before you got her. Normally, when a bird has a bad habit, it doesn't show itself until the bird is totally situated in a home and has completely settled in with the new family. Then, the problem starts showing itself. There's many standard answers to your problem but you've tried them with no good results. I've dealt with different parrots that have serious issues and when a bird is an adult, is rehomed, some of those problems remain no matter what you do.

 

I have one suggestion----try to find some CDs that have a variety of parrots making all different types of sounds. Usually, those parrots are recorded in the wild. There's no particular one strictly for greys but parrots tune in to other parrots as long as human talk isn't involved. You can search online under the headings of NOISY PARROTS,SCREECHING PARROTS.CDs are available. Some come with a soothing music background embedded but the best are the ones that are strictly parrot sounds. Put it loud and relatively near the bird so he/she tunes in. Don't keep it on all day. Don't let your bird get used to it. Use intervels of every 2/3/4 hours for about 45 min each session even if your bird isn't making noise.

It just may help if his noise is curtailed by the sounds of other parrots.

[SRSeedBurners]

It might help too if you could capture some video of the problem and post it.

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

You sound awesome as a parent, and she sounds awesome as a very good friend! I am half deaf, so noice doesn't bother me! If it DOES.... that means they are being VERY loud! I say... " SHHHHHH"... they become like mice. They understand what shhhhhh means. A matter of training. You can do it. Nancy

[katana600]

I don't know how to help you because my rehomed Timneh about same age is opposite. She is withdrawn and doesn't take to new people well after our three years together. My only thought is based on what I have read in here where some of our members have whispered to their grey and they had to stop what they were doing with the loud noise in order to hear. Maybe if you whisper, give her a treat and get her to associate whispers as a good thing. You do sound like a very dedicated and loving companion to Elwood and I hope it helps just a little to know we care and can identify with the frustration of this one thing that she is doing to drive you to distraction. The little pip! Dave is much more experienced and I may even give those videos a try.

[Inara]

You've received some great advice! How frustrating for you that Elwood does not seem to be responding to all of the appropriate remedies you've tried. My TAG makes this very irritating sound that I finally traced to our plates clattering together when I take them out of the dishwasher. Of all the sounds to pick up and amplify, that one was not one I would have liked.

 

By considering your TAG's noise a tantrum, you're already raising your own blood pressure and irritation level. Elwood is simply making a noise, one that Elwood learned at some point in life and that she thinks sounds great. Check the noise level in your home when Elwood does the sound. It's natural for Greys, especially, to want to join in the party so if the humans in the room are having a lively conversation, laughing, talking animatedly, or the TV is going, Greys will often up the ante in the noise department. If your house is quiet, it's another story.

 

Ignoring/rewarding works best when it is immediate. This is a case where clicker training may also be very helpful. There are very good books out there on the proper way to clicker train to extinguish unwanted behaviors in a positive manner.

 

Keep us posted, and I agree a video would be great info. Hang in there we're all behind you!

[MoSull]

Thanks everyone for the wonderful responses! Dave, I have been thinking about doing the parrot sounds for a while, even just to expand Elwood's horizons a little bit. She loves to talk and make noise, so I think that CDs might do her a lot of good.

 

Inara, I honest to god don't know what else to call it but a tantrum. I have had a lot of animals, and while I know that most animals don't have the mental capacity to be spiteful, it seems like it might well be the case with my little Elwood. She makes this sound whenever she wants something, it seems like she might be making this noise for attention. She's a very emotional animal. It seems like nothing is ever good enough for her. I'll hold her for as long as I can and talk to her all day, but she is constantly demanding things. I fear as though I may have accidentally spoiled her, and now she can't go an hour without screaming until someone acknowledges her, be it negatively or positively. She makes the noise all day and night, when I have ten people over or if it's just me. She makes the noise regardless of the activity level in my apartment. She makes the noise when I leave the room or if I'm in the room with her and she decides that she wants something.

 

I will definitely be looking into clicker training and seeing if me talking more quietly to her results in her talking more quietly to me. Hopefully I can see some changes! I might also try to post a video of the behavior, so you guys can get a better idea of what I am talking about. No promises, however, because even though I'm 22 and part of the 'technology generation', I'm pretty well incompetent, haha.

 

Mary

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

Mary you can do it! Clicker training sounds good! Get your friends to help. Nancy