Bittersweetness

[Muse]

It's going to be hard to write this, so forgive typos as the screen is a little blurry right now...

 

Before Marden died, we had this little routine. He would go to bed with daddy, who keeps day hours. When I would go in the room, he'd always wake up, and I'd go over and give him some scritches and kisses, and he'd make this very soft coo for me. He was always so sweet, even if I'd woke him from a sound sleep. Megan was always hateful when I woke her up, often striking at the side of the cage if I passed too close.

 

After I lost Marden, I hated to even go to bed, knowing he wasn't there. Not having our little bedtime ritual was one of those moments that pointedly underlined the loss and it was like a knife stabbing into my heart.

 

Fast forward to the last few weeks. I have no idea what started this. Megan always had this... sound... kind of a warbling coo. When I tried to touch her head, she would either make this sound or not. If she did, it meant it was okay to pet her. If she didn't, it was touch at my own risk (which I usually do not do as I don't like being bitten). So now, she sleeps on a play stand in our room. She also has a cage, but it's mostly used for making noise by biting the bars or banging the door when she wants us awake. With her daddy, she will fly to the bed and land on him to wake him up but she never does with me.

 

She has this one sort of low branch where she sits to sleep. I go in at night and have to walk right behind her to get to the bathroom to brush my teeth. So I started going over to her and saying good night. At first she'd do that warbling cooing sound indicating she wanted to be petted. But then a couple of weeks ago, she started making the exact sound Mar used to make. And she started giving me kisses. And letting me give her scritches.

 

I am not sure what caused this change. The first few times, it just made me cry because it reminded me so much of Mar. More and more I am getting used to it and actually look forward to her little kisses before going to bed.

 

Update:

So I have started asking her "Make that little noise that mama loves?" and most of the time, she does. It's funny because she KNEW what noise I mean the first time I asked that.

Edited June 16, 2014 by Muse
Update

[Ray P]

I understand how you feel as Cricket and I had our special moments and I miss them so much.

Corky and I also have our special moments that we have shared with her all her life. She is a spoiled rotten teen ager now

When we first met Corky she was 9 weeks old and it was love at first sight. 6 weeks later she came home with us and we spoiled her rotten and still do.

[Inara]

What a lovely story, and understandable how Megan has brought you to tears with her sweetness right now, especially. What a treasure.

[Muse]

I understand how you feel as Cricket and I had our special moments and I miss them so much.

Corky and I also have our special moments that we have shared with her all her life. She is a spoiled rotten teen ager now

When we first met Corky she was 9 weeks old and it was love at first sight. 6 weeks later she came home with us and we spoiled her rotten and still do.

 

Thank you for your reply, Ray. I am so sorry for your loss.

 

I am all for spoiling birds.

[danmcq]

Those moments that bring back a flood of memories of passed on loved ones are a blessing and a curse. There are the heart felt pangs longing for them, yet we we can appreciate even more how much they brought in to our lives. Those memories which are MANY, are well worth the flood of feelings we have. Enjoy the living and find pleasure and solace in the memories you have knowing it was reciprocal as well.

[Muse]

Thank you, Dan for the kind and very wise words.

[Brat Birds]

AS one door closes another opens. Megan feels your loss. As you go to bed she has come to enjoy your moments together. It was a sweet, sweet story.

[judygram]

She is taking up the slack that the loss of Mar has created, she senses your pain and its her way of consoling you, whatever the reason for it I am glad it has happened, enjoy it.

[Muse]

Thank you. I try to. Today she was being really cute and sweet and I said, "Can you make the noise? The one mama likes?" and she did. She's really becoming a sweet young lady.

[Muse]

Thank you. Very true - I actually have a woven lap throw that was my grandma's that says "When got closes a door, He opens a window." I truly believe all things happen for a reason even if I am having trouble seeing what that reason might be. And I am starting to enjoy time with her more. We've both become a lot closer now.

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

Muse... I am so happy that you and Megan are getting along better! While I continue to grieve the loss of Zoey, I knew I needed to let Ollie grieve as well. We needed to build a future together. We are getting there. Ollie now sleeps with me nightly. We are grieving together. The relationship is thriving. Nancy

[Muse]

That is wonderful to hear. I am sure Ollie is enjoying sleeping with you and I am sure that helps both of you.

[chezron]

What a sweet story. I am happy for you.

 

I have a similar story. I had my first quaker for 20 years. If I was making coffee i would stir the cup and tap the rim of the cup twice, with the spoon, to dry off the spoon. It made a ringing bell-like sound that my quaker copied. I thought it was so sweet because he never missed. He watched me so closely. He was the sweetest little guy and I miss him. Well, guess who does the same thing? Brutus, my grey, makes the little ringing sounds when I make my coffee and it makes me melt every time. I feel like I am in the movie, It's a Wonderful Life when Clarence says, "every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings." I feel like Bob is communicating with me through Brutus. So sweet!

[Muse]

What a sweet story. I am happy for you.

 

I have a similar story. I had my first quaker for 20 years. If I was making coffee i would stir the cup and tap the rim of the cup twice, with the spoon, to dry off the spoon. It made a ringing bell-like sound that my quaker copied. I thought it was so sweet because he never missed. He watched me so closely. He was the sweetest little guy and I miss him. Well, guess who does the same thing? Brutus, my grey, makes the little ringing sounds when I make my coffee and it makes me melt every time. I feel like I am in the movie, It's a Wonderful Life when Clarence says, "every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings." I feel like Bob is communicating with me through Brutus. So sweet!

 

That is just precious!