It is time to stop the bickering.

[Wingy]

I try to stay out of the garbage but enough is enough. The finger pointing and all this petty negativity has got to stop. Does it make any birds life better? Isn't that what we are here for?

 

I am using my best Mom voice here and have my pointer finger out so listen up. We are a flock, sometimes a very dysfunctional flock but a flock none the less, trying to do our best to give our feathered companions a shot at a long, happy and healthy life. We do that by bouncing ideas off of each other and by discussing our own personal successes and failures. The old ways and the new ways are all ways and deserve equal voice and consideration. I am going to say this again because I feel it is important The old ways and the new ways are all ways and deserve equal voice and consideration. Goodness knows that aside from some food and safety concerns, nothing about our Greys is one size fits all. If it was there would no need for this forum and we could just all buy the book.

 

I am here to learn from you, laugh with you, cheer you on, cry with you and pray with you. Sometimes I can offer a piece of advice or share something but more often than not I leave having gotten far more than I could ever give.

 

This is my opinion and everyone is free to agree or disagree in whole or in part.

[Ray P]

Well said Wingy. Family is family and friends are friends and it`s never smooth sailing.

[JeffNOK]

This has become a serious recurrent problem. I love this forum and all its members, but I am afraid that Grey Forums is in real danger of losing all credibility and respect if this is allowed to continue. Good people get run off of here with shocking regularity. I am here to stay because I love my grey and I want to continue to learn and even offer my advice if it can be helpful. Unfortunately, some members get so beat up that they justifiably remove themselves from the hostility. These dramas are not isolated events, and the level of sarcasm and outright abuse has reached a point that I cannot respect myself as a member here if I do not speak. I believe there is a large "silent majority" here who feel as I do.

Edited May 19, 2013 by JeffNOK

[JeffNOK]

Maggie, I don't think I have been silent. I have tried in many threads through the last year to comment and remind myself and others to maintain civility. I have never taken sides, but I have consistently made my thoughts known respectfully. If I have ever had an issue with anyone in this forum I have dealt with them privately rather than using a public thread. I would recommend that to anyone. I have not harped on this latest issue. This is my first comment regarding it. Moving on is the key, but sadly it seems that the forum "moves on" from one battle only to devolve into the same thing again days or weeks later. This is my forum, too, and I can't just act like this is ok. As a whole community we need to find a productive way to address it while maintaining everyone's personal dignity. My comment in this thread is not a personal attack on anyone. The fact that I felt compelled to speak so frankly is that I am sad and frustrated and past admonitions to "play nice" don't seem to change anything.

[danmcq]

Moving on is the key, but sadly it seems that the forum "moves on" from one battle only to devolve into the same thing again days or weeks later. This is my forum, too, and I can't just act like this is ok. As a whole community we need to find a productive way to address it while maintaining everyone's personal dignity. My comment in this thread is not a personal attack on anyone. The fact that I felt compelled to speak so frankly is that I am sad and frustrated and past admonitions to "play nice" don't seem to change anything.

 

Amen Jeff!!!

 

Lets get off this human topic, stop replying and get back to the reason and key topic of this entire forum. Our Greys! This has become ridiculous and I haven't even bothered replying in any of the other threads because it's a waste of time and just keeps escalating. Enough!!!!!!!!!!!Stop!!!!!!!

 

Now a civil on topic question on this GREY FORUM. How is everyones Greys doing? Dayo is fine and calling me so gotta go!

[judygram]

Thanks so much Dan.

Josey is doing just fine, she chomped down on a chicken bone last night with nothing but crumbs left, it was thoroughly enjoyed.

[birdhouse]

I think you're right Wingy. You're also not the first member to have said pretty much any of this. And I think, knowing the little I do about you, that you in particular wouldn't have posted this thread unless you really felt strongly about the whole tone & interaction that has become depressingly more frequent here.

 

We all have totally different life experiences. We all have a different capacity to read & write. "That's SO NOT what I meant!" & "It just sounded different in my head!" are bound to happen. And most times, I think, when the OP respects the fact that members aren't connecting the way they intended, a short dialog is all it takes to work it out.

 

But sadly I think this is so far beyond that or even "bickering". There are members here who don't believe that they have any obligation to respect other members' time, effort, experience, opinions, research or feelings. Especially feelings. Just because they like themselves, they've granted themselves the right to say anything they chose, in any form they chose & demand that others accept w/o question & applaud their "truth".

 

By definition, this is neither a healthy flock mentality or anything like constructive forum decorum. Particularly When the gospel according to whoever is written in disappearing ink & other members are in the least made to look foolish. It also gives readers going forward the perception that the target's responses are overly dramatic & unreasonable or wrong when in fact they did have a basis in something that is no longer available to everyone.

 

And btw, it sucks to be on the receiving end. After many years I no longer feel like I have a voice on this site. Even accepting my tendency to think outside of the box, I feel like anything I say is fair game for target practice purely on the grounds that I'm not in favor w/those who will shred everything no matter how I validate it; whether it's experience, opinions, research or feelings.

 

I quit posting because it's just painful to try not only to stand up to that, but to do it in a way that doesn't stoop to that same level. I don't think I'm anyone special & I really don't think that I have anything special to say, especially given what's left of my credibility after everything. Also because I have to go so far out of my way to justify most anything I post. The time & effort are no longer worth it to me. Even as much as it scares me that so much harmful misinformation is being accepted purely on the basis of who's posting the "facts".

 

Let's just say it's not fun any more. So rather than go out in a blaze of crap slinging, I've simply quit trying to coexist w/mean people. The only reason I come back now is PMs w/friends that I've been fortunate enough to make here. I do still browse thru while I'm here, if I have time. Guess I'm a lurker, now. But anyway, it's how I saw this & (what's left of the scorched earth that was) Earthchild's thread. And I really wish I hadn't. Very, very sad. Something that was very special is gone & that community is fractured beyond recognition now. Hope it can be rebuilt before this becomes another waste of space forum like so many others.

 

Just be nice to each other. It would go such a long way towards turning things around.

[SRSeedBurners]

80/20 rule in full affect here. When I was in the Marines we called them the 10%. I started lurking a year ago and knew where the trouble comes from on a regular basis before I signed up - it's all in the archives.

[Timbersmom]

I'm all for new beginnings myself. I totally agree with you Jeff, disagreements should be reserved for PM's. Dan, Timber is happy a a clam today. He has a corrugated forage box (his favorite) and an artichoke (also his favorite veggie) so lifeis good in Timberland! At least for the moment

[Talon]

Kudos to everyone willing to hang in there & move forward with positve posts. After all, we are here for OUR birds, not to bicker or point fingers.

 

My birds are great today, they were loving and sweet during breakfast, and was quite excited to see that they got corn on the cob in their snack bowls when I put them in what I call "jail" while I go to work.

[Greywings]

Humans-no wonder we choose to live with Grey parrots. Smokey Joe had to comment when I was feeding Fred the SC2 his breakfast this morning "Awsome" said with feeling. Funny bird he had already dug into his bowl.

[danmcq]

LOL, I'll bet it feels good to get an "Awesome" rating on food from Smokey Joe!

 

All I ever get from Dayo is a list of things I didn't happen to include like rigatoni, coconut, enchiladas, chicken bones etc. He seems to never be thankful for what I give him on a particular day. I guess I just need to go the "Smorgasbord" route and let him pick and chose, then call the local homeless shelter to bring some folks over to eat all the let overs each meal.

[Jayd]

im typing this myself please be patient. in my deepest heart i want to thank all for the emails and pm you sent me. thank you all for the support and encouragement and the heart felt concern. thank you for asking me to continue posting and being a member of this forum.

im going to be a little different when i post, im going to post a reply only, no personal opinion, with support needed if asked for. i well respond to the question not the person [to a point] and leave my smart and sometimes arrogant mouth out of the post lol.

as joe and some of your parrots might say, what ever:p

thank you all so much j