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I did a bad bad thing


Guest Jocelyn

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Guest Jocelyn

I didn't even think about it, Romeo has been in a bit of a mood lately, he is not really a biter but occasionally he nips. Today he was begging for some water from my cup so I allowed it and he returned the favor by attempting to give me a little warning nip, before I could even think of what I was doing I swatted him, not even remotely hard but a swat is a swat and he knew damn well what I had done. Romeo has never been smacked we have never even pretended to do anything even remotely physical to him, we have never shook his cage nothing like that. We don't even yell at him. It just slipped now I don't know what to do. He looked really upset and really really angry. He didnt even nip at me he just gave a warning swing. He has never even bit to draw blood. I wonder if he will now...

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Don't beat yourself up now. I'm sure your relationship will weather this. I know you just reacted and never meant to do any harm. Just learn from this and don't let it happen again. It is not a small thing, but move forward with the best of intentions to always think before acting. Keep us updated how things go. You love your grey and I feel for you.

Edited by JeffNOK
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Guest Jocelyn

You should have seen the look in those Grey eyes! How could you!

He is a good bird though and after giving me a good nip when I asked him to step up that night all seemed to been forgiven, if not forgotten as he has been given me the eyes since it happened. Thanks guys. Still cant believe I did it. I am fine with giving the cats and dogs a swat now and again but he isnt like them.

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If you swat one species it is difficult to not swat others, it becomes a muscle response-kind of on auto pilot. I know he will forgive you but you may have to find other means to let your other critters know when they need to stop what ever they are doing other than a swat. Having worked with dogs for many years I can tell you a swat can earn you a self defense bite on occasion. It is a natural reaction for one to defend ones self from an incoming blow. Hope all continues to go well for the understanding between you all.

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I am with Greywings on swatting dogs or other critters. We have had dogs and cats most of our lives. The last few decades we have been both raising and rescuing Dobermans. You never want to hit, swat, kick or any other violent method on them. There is no reason to. They are very keen on body language, understand your words and can sense your emotions instantly. Physically trying to control a dog can be very damaging to not only them, but also to the person doing it when they get fed up with it. Of course there are those that will cower and shake in fear, but that is just to sad t see and personally infuriates me. I have worked with Dobermans that had been abused and it took a long time to help them understand they need no longer fear a human and cower or bite if they sense you seem to be angry. It takes a long time to build trust between humans and critters when damage has been done.

 

But, I am not saying you have done this, but just stop the swatting please. :) You would be shocked at the things you can do to make a critter prance out of the room when you wish, you just need to learn what alarms them. I had one female Doberman that if I sneezed or even acted like I was going to would prance down to the bedroom and wait until she thought "All was clear". :P

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I think Greywings nailed it. Your reaction was very likely associated with reinforced behavior with your other animals. When Gracie bit me the other day at my parents' house I raised my voice to her in a way I never had before, but had done so with the dogs. The minute it came out of my mouth I was surprised at myself. I know not to raise my voice to a grey--but it came out before I had a chance to think. To be honest, I know better now than to raise my voice to a dog, cat, or person as well, but in the past I acted out of mis-information. Guilt won't help, but it is always good to do a mental assessment and learn the roots of things, so they can be avoided going forward. I'm glad things seem to be getting better. We are all sending you positive thoughts through this.

Edited by JeffNOK
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Jocelyn... proud of you for being honest. Remember.... a grey is extremely intelligent. We are lucky that they forgive and forget quickly. BUT.... they are physically inferior to a dog or cat. You can do what I did when my kids were younger and driving me crazy.... lock yourself in the bathroom for ten minutes! LOL! You are going to be a great mama! Always remind yourself how fragile they are. Nancy

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Guest Jocelyn
Jocelyn... proud of you for being honest. Remember.... a grey is extremely intelligent. We are lucky that they forgive and forget quickly. BUT.... they are physically inferior to a dog or cat. You can do what I did when my kids were younger and driving me crazy.... lock yourself in the bathroom for ten minutes! LOL! You are going to be a great mama! Always remind yourself how fragile they are. Nancy

 

LOL! The bathroom is very close to Romeo's cage, I can not do anything in the washroom privatly without hearing hello? helllllllooooo? come here? COME HERE! lol and worse yet if the dogs are put away and he is out he takes the liberty of hoping off his cage and knocking on the bathroom door :S

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Jocelyn... I havent been in the bathroom for over 20 years by myself, except the few times I locked the door. LOL! Ignore the scratches.Always take a phone with you, call a friend. They can always calm us down. If not.... send me a message... I'll help you. I laugh now.... kids off in college, but nothing else has changed. When I open the bathroom door, there is Ollie, Zoey and Sophie my bird. Just waiting! LOL! Nancy

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