Jessy my new grey need help

[stephan79]

hi guys

 

im new here and im from Australia,

 

Ok i have just got myself a 4 month old grey girl i got her on the the 12th of April and i got her for the family and now i hit a problem.

 

OK well now im the only one who can go near her and the only one who can pick her up if my wife or my kids go near her she wants to bite them and she puffs up and tries to get them now my wife and kids don't want to go near her and my wife is upset now cause she was to be a family pet .

 

what can i do now ???

 

how can i change her or can i change her i don't know ,why she is like this or is this how grey are ???

please if anyone can help me i would like to know how so my family and able to play with her ???

[judygram]

Greys tend to pick a favorite in the family and its not necessarily the one who initially wanted her but all is not lost. You are her favorite but a good relationship can be built if your wife and kids realize this is a wild animal and it takes time to build trust and it can't be rushed. They are probably wanting to rush her so have them back off a bit and offer her treats and let her decide when she is ready for them to be closer.

I don't know what you mean when you say they want to play with her but she is not a toy, if she doesn't want handled then you have to respect her wishes, the last thing you want to do is force themselves on her, this will take time and lots of patience but the rewards will be worth it.

Greys tend to be nervous and do not like change, they are very aware of their surroundings and on the lookout for what they deem to be predators and she is showing her displeasure by puffing up and biting, she is trying to tell you she is not ready so slow down a bit and see what happens.

Jessy can still be a family pet but you will have to work to make it happen and that takes time.

[Luvparrots]

Hi Stephan, welcome to the Grey family. I have two greys and a zon. I live alone so my flock is bonded to me. However there are other members of the family/neighborhood that each of them likes and interacts with. However, my parrots choose whom they will like and be with. Your family needs to relax and let nature take its course. My gang love pistachios and anyone with a handful is sure to have a parrot or two on their shoulder/arm of their chair. As Judy said, let your parrot make up her own mind and everyone just relax.

[stephan79]

Greys tend to pick a favorite in the family and its not necessarily the one who initially wanted her but all is not lost. You are her favorite but a good relationship can be built if your wife and kids realize this is a wild animal and it takes time to build trust and it can't be rushed. They are probably wanting to rush her so have them back off a bit and offer her treats and let her decide when she is ready for them to be closer.

I don't know what you mean when you say they want to play with her but she is not a toy, if she doesn't want handled then you have to respect her wishes, the last thing you want to do is force themselves on her, this will take time and lots of patience but the rewards will be worth it.

Greys tend to be nervous and do not like change, they are very aware of their surroundings and on the lookout for what they deem to be predators and she is showing her displeasure by puffing up and biting, she is trying to tell you she is not ready so slow down a bit and see what happens.

Jessy can still be a family pet but you will have to work to make it happen and that takes time.

 

SORRY when i meant play i meant giving her scratchers and interacting with her, ok cool ill give it a try they dont really push her but whats happing now is that they dont want to go next to her cause they ae scared , i hope she can turn around for them ill do this little things you have told me , thanks

[Spock]

All things good take time, not just's days but weeks our months, be patient...............................

[JeffNOK]

Greys can indeed love many people. They may bond especially strongly with one person, but that doesn't mean they won't warm up to the whole family in time. The advice given so far is good. Take time, don't rush things, and let your bird make the first moves. It is never a good idea to force the issue or to give unwanted advances. I think things will improve quickly when everyone takes a step back.

[murfchck]

I tried responding a few times yesterday but couldn't put in writing what was in my head. Judy said it best for me! Your little girl is so young, and what or how she is taught now will affect her the rest of her life. These guys are not for the faint of heart and nothing like the typical dog or cat so you all as a family should do some reading to learn and understand them. There are many great threads on here to help you and your family give her the best life, she deserves it!

[aerial.2000]

Theres alot of things I could say as well but I think the way you said that these birds are wild animals and not a dog or cat. They arent cuddly (persay) lil creatures. Marco does things at HER pace when SHE wants lol and I live with that and take her lead. If she wants to come over and join me on the couch she does, if she doesnt I dont make her. For real you cant make them do anything they dont wanna, lol their beaks will definately voice their disproval of something and quick like.

 

Marco is able to be handle by me and hubby however he can not get away with (as he calls it) kisses or anything that I can becuz I am her chosen. but hes able to have a great great relationship with her, carry her, feed her and talk w/her and that makes him happy. my kids who are 19 & 18 no relationship at all and shell definately bite them, but they havent taken the time to even TRY so... thats all i can expect her to do with them.

 

I have had Marco over a year now and its really taken that long to just get used to each other and routines and limitations etc....

[katana600]

One thing to note is that sometimes greys change loyalties so the chosen one today may not always be so. Be mindful of the pain of rejection felt by other family members and work to show Jessy they are very important to you. If you are her favorite for now, be the one to introduce the others and chastise her gently if she is aggressive towards any one else, then walk away from her so she sees you are all a package deal and you don't want her hurting your other flock members. Let the others offer her food and treats in a protected environment when you are not standing right there. Also what helped with ours when she was attacking our youngest daughter during a home visit from college, we all left the room and my daughter used a step up stick to bring her to join the flock in a mock "rescue" and after three or four times of doing that once a day, she started seeing value in how she could "use" other flockmates. She has never gotten enamored with them, but tolerates them and permits them to pick her up. Gilbert on the other hand, has changed loyalties many times over and it stings when I am the one being pushed aside, so I am very understanding and empathetic to others when he chooses to give them the stink eye and cold shoulder.