Have you ever wondered about your choice?

[chezron]

I love my grey Brutus so much my heart aches thinking about it. I sometimes think that given the normal life expectancies of us both that he will outlive both my husband and I. I feel bad about that. I worry his heart will break without our current family. I know he brings out the best in me. I have patience and tenderness to levels I never thought possible for another being.

 

I plan on actively looking for a younger family to take him when we get too old to care for him, but i will never know if they actually will care for him as we do. Sometimes I wonder about whether there is validity in articles that say parrots should not be kept as pets because of the life span issue. What do you think?

[Ray P]

I have the same thought about our birds and about our other pets to.

We have a number of friends that would take our birds, but they will never get them.

We are still working on that issue.

[Greywings]

I think you have to put something in writing to cover an unforseen illness or accident that may end your life or debilitate you to the extent you and family can not care for your flock. Perhaps a Sanctuary, a good friend that your bird is comfortable with or a forum member you respect. Do ask questions, do make contacts and do your research to make the best decision you are able. Not all Parrots live to a ripe old age, some have heart problems or other unseen internal problems or meet with an accident and we out live them. Thinking practically about this issue prior to need. I also suggest talking to your bird about your thought process as I think it helps us and lets them know how much we care. Even if they don't understand all the words they understand our feelings.

[danmcq]

I love my grey Brutus so much my heart aches thinking about it. I sometimes think that given the normal life expectancies of us both that he will outlive both my husband and I. I feel bad about that. I worry his heart will break without our current family. I know he brings out the best in me. I have patience and tenderness to levels I never thought possible for another being. I plan on actively looking for a younger family to take him when we get too old to care for him, but i will never know if they actually will care for him as we do. Sometimes I wonder about whether there is validity in articles that say parrots should not be kept as pets because of the life span issue. What do you think?

 

I understand your feelings on this topic and have the same worries and heart felt pangs when thinking about it. In regards greys being kept with us humans. Well all these thousands being hatched in captivity need loving homes and would never survive in the wild. So I feel good about being able to give Dayo a loving first home.

 

Dayo will live decades beyond us. Our lives have been changing drastically over the last year and a half with my wifes side affects from previous chemo and radiation treatments 12 years ago. She is now permanently disabled (We are thankful though, the alternative would have been death). We are having to downsize and purchased a mobile home (our home is being foreclosed on) we will be moving in to in about a month after I have a handicapped ramp built she can use her walker to get up to the deck and enter it. I also just had a neck lymph node surgically removed to be biopsied and will know the results in a week. We just had to give our last Doberman Chloe to our son (He and family love her and it's a great place for her) because dogs over 25 pounds are not allowed in this lovely lake and tree community. This has caused much heartache, but we had no choice. Thank god Dayo and Jake of course are going with us.

 

But, what is shocking is how fast these life altering changes can take place and turn your life upside down. Thankfully, when the time comes that we can no longer care for Dayo and Jake properly, they both have good homes we have already arranged for in advance when that time comes. Still just the thought of this worries me and breaks my heart knowing in the future (hopefully at least 5 or 10 years from now) they will need to move on to another loving home.

 

How fast life can change?

 

In one year:

 

- Wife started having medical issues, tons of Lab work, Xrays, CT-Scans, MRI's, Nerve conduction tests etc.

- Put on Disability.

- Loss of very large income and medical insurance through her company. My company only covers employee's not family members.

- Start paying 1300 a month for medical insurance

- Start paying huge medical bills until deductible met

- Go through Bankruptcy

- Go through home work-out over and over until finally denied

- On and on one thing after another

 

So, it is imperative to have plans at least for the very much loved creatures you share your life with in advance. Your life can be turned upside down in a very short amount of time.

Edited April 4, 2013 by danmcq

[Jayd]

Dan, All we have left to give is prayers.

[danmcq]

Dan, All we have left to give is prayers.

 

Thank You. Kim and I appreciate that.

 

But, I do not want this thread to to become about us. It is about our much loved Greys and other parrots and critters future. It is critical for all Grey owners to understand the importance of having plans for their Greys and other critters, should the unexpected to happen.

[Ray P]

Dan I know where you are coming from. I also have a ill wife and I feel like I am walking on the edge, but we just keep hanging in there.

[Dave007]

I understand your feelings on this topic and have the same worries and heart felt pangs when thinking about it. In regards greys being kept with us humans. Well all these thousands being hatched in captivity need loving homes and would never survive in the wild. So I feel good about being able to give Dayo a loving first home.

 

Dayo will live decades beyond us. Our lives have been changing drastically over the last year and a half with my wifes side affects from previous chemo and radiation treatments 12 years ago. She is now permanently disabled (We are thankful though, the alternative would have been death). We are having to downsize and purchased a mobile home (our home is being foreclosed on) we will be moving in to in about a month after I have a handicapped ramp built she can use her walker to get up to the deck and enter it. I also just had a neck lymph node surgically removed to be biopsied and will know the results in a week. We just had to give our last Doberman Chloe to our son (He and family love her and it's a great place for her) because dogs over 25 pounds are not allowed in this lovely lake and tree community. This has caused much heartache, but we had no choice. Thank god Dayo and Jake of course are going with us.

 

But, what is shocking is how fast these life altering changes can take place and turn your life upside down. Thankfully, when the time comes that we can no longer care for Dayo and Jake properly, they both have good homes we have already arranged for in advance when that time comes. Still just the thought of this worries me and breaks my heart knowing in the future (hopefully at least 5 or 10 years from now) they will need to move on to another loving home.

 

How fast life can change?

 

In one year:

 

- Wife started having medical issues, tons of Lab work, Xrays, CT-Scans, MRI's, Nerve conduction tests etc.

- Put on Disability.

- Loss of very large income and medical insurance through her company. My company only covers employee's not family members.

- Start paying 1300 a month for medical insurance

- Start paying huge medical bills until deductible met

- Go through Bankruptcy

- Go through home work-out over and over until finally denied

- On and on one thing after another

 

So, it is imperative to have plans at least for the very much loved creatures you share your life with in advance. Your life can be turned upside down in a very short amount of time.

 

I know how you feel. I'm going through the same thing. My wife has Lupus which runs in the family. We've gone through the tests, chemotherapy infusions once a month, heavy duty medical subscriptions which made us use a medical prescription service. Even I have medical problems. I was on disability but I'm now offcially retired. Money wise, the disability covered much more. The medical bills until deductible is met has decided to move into my house on a permanent basis. * On and on, one thing after another* -that's also moved into my house. Right now, she's driving down to Scranton (40 miles ) to get her monthly infusion.

The hospital wher we go for tests lredy know us by our first names. Makes one wonder if it's all worth it. There's a God? I don't think so. Let's just say that I lost my faith many many many years ago. Realism took over.

So to get back to my birds, I'm lucky that I have a close friend who'll take all of them. He's also heavyily involved with parrots as I am. I've known him for about 25 yrs. He also breeds TAGs.

[Jayd]

Thank You. Kim and I appreciate that.

 

But, I do not want this thread to to become about us. It is about our much loved Greys and other parrots and critters future. It is critical for all Grey owners to understand the importance of having plans for their Greys and other critters, should the unexpected to happen.

Dan, no, this is more than about just our birds, this is about our friend'S, all of you, givers of life and love caretakers of all who need you. Yes, we'll move on, but not this second, Dave, this takes the last of my faith, you all don't deserve it, you all have so much to give. So Damit, GIVE, AND DON'T STOP..........................

[Wingy]

Life span was something that I did think about before I made the decision to look for a Grey. I talked with my adult DS, who agreed to take Jake and I put money aside for his care. My DS was involved and would make the trip with me from the beginning when Jake was only partially feathered and being hand fed. Even though my DS does not live at home Jake runs to him, loves on him and they play silly games together. I have no doubt that my DS will take excellent care of Jake and that the two of them would help each other get through my passing. There is a wrinkle in the plan though as my partner in crime and Jake are best buds so if I go first my partner will have first choice in keeping Jake. If Jake survives my partner he would still go to my DS.

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

Dan,Dave,Ray and Jayd... its not just about our birds...its about you all as well. We are all an extended family, and when you guys are struggling with health issues,oneway or another, we are concerned. Noone should be paying 1300 dollars a month for healthcare. Hopefully, Obamacare will make a difference this year.

As far as designating in a will about who will care for our birds, I have done so. My bestfriend will care for them if I passed away unexpectantly before kids are finished with college and established. Ryan gets Sophie and Sunny, Sean gets Kiki. She3 is bird experienced and all the birds know and love her. Nancy

[Timbersmom]

My kids already are putting dibs in for Timber (doesn't exactly make me feel warm and fuzzy but I know they love him and know what is involved in his care. I'd trust any of them to care for him properly, and asked that they let him have some say in where he goes if it comes to that.

[Jayd]

Please, all of you, Ray and Dave and Dan, and Judy and Janet and your family's and all I haven't mentioned, take care of your selves, your all I've had besides my fids and Maggie for a while, I'm not saying anything more, just take care of your selves and stay safe and well. I'm tired and have nothing left to give. This news just shattered me..I love you.............................................................

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

Jayd...everyone is going to be just fine! So are you! Nancy

[chezron]

Dan and Dave,

I just read the replies to my thread. I am extremely sorry for the hardships you are going through. I wish nothing but the best for you and your families.

[danmcq]

Please, all of you, Ray and Dave and Dan, and Judy and Janet and your family's and all I haven't mentioned, take care of your selves, your all I've had besides my fids and Maggie for a while, I'm not saying anything more, just take care of your selves and stay safe and well. I'm tired and have nothing left to give. This news just shattered me..I love you.............................................................

 

Jay - Thank you.

 

I cannot speak for others, but this forum has been many of ours "Facebook" before "Facebook" ever existed. Granted it is a very narrowly focused forum on our much loved fids and friends here, but thats what most of us came here for and enjoy the fellowship and helping others as the need arises. This is where we can go and communicate with others without the need for physical strength other than to sit and type. It is a place we can both encourage and be encouraged, teach and also be taught, laugh with others, cry with others and most importantly Listen to each other.

 

I know this is the first place I go when rising in the mornings and look forward to it. I believe that is true of you and many others here on this forum as well. You do have the strength and faith to carry on, due to the love that presses you forward to share your love for our fids and members here. So, lets just keep on keeping on as an example for those we consider just "children" here on this forum that will hopefully at least glean some knowledge, encouragement and maybe even good examples to follow in good times and bad. The "Next Generation" is watching and listening to us. Lets give them the knowledge and tools they need to carry on where we will no longer be able to at some future point in time.

Edited April 5, 2013 by danmcq

[Luvparrots]

My parrots have more or less chosen their successor parront. Ana Grey has her favorite relative. Sterling Gris has his favorite grandson. Louie is a man's parrot and has chose the young man next door. Though they love me best, they do clearly have other favorites.

[kins2321@yahoo.com]

Its great to see that many of us have greys that love others, its important to encourage that. Do I get jealous that Sophie loves Ryan, Sean, half my friends? No. Why would I? I am her ROM (mom). I keep her safe, well fed, discipline when needed, I educate her, deal with any of her issues. When kids come home from college, I'm dirt. I LOVE it! Within a few days of them being home, she is all over me again. Totally normal behavior. Sometimes I miss her sooner.... sneak in and pickup my girl to steal a few snuggles. She is happy to give me some kisses. Nancy

[JeffNOK]

I am fortunate that Gracie seems to have a big heart and likes other people (although I didn't like HOW MUCH she seemed to like my father after I was a way a few days.) I went to the funeral of my grandmother this Saturday. I didn't want to be away overnight, so I drove four hours to my destination in the early morning and returned that evening. Two of my friends (Pam and Marie) took shifts spending time with Gracie. From their reports, everyone had a great time--lots of play and chatter and engagement all around. After I got home, Gracie kept saying "Marie come see Gracie", and "Gracie want Pammy." I don't like to think about what will happen when I am not here anymore. I'm 46, so hopefully I've got some good decades left (my grandmother was 91). But if and when that day comes, I believe Gracie has been socialized well enough to open her heart to a new parront.

[chelseaB]

This topic has always weighed on my mind, I refer to myself as being on the wrong side of 50. I know Biscotti and I may have several decades together, but as many of us have experienced , you just don't know what turn your life may take.

At this time I honestly do not know of anyone I would entrust with Biscotti's well being. None of my family members would give him the love & care he deserves, they are just not parrot people. Hopefully one day Biscotti will take a shine to some one who could turn out to be his next guardian, if the time comes.

As for now, I think I will give instructions that if something happens to me, my family will post on the forum that Biscotti needs a new caregiver & that someone who knows greys will take him & keep him or find a suitable home for him.

I suppose a rescue would be a last resort. It is sad to think about, but necessary.

I hope everyone has many more years with their fids.

[Greywings]

We are each others shoulder for strength, to cry on and to listen when we need an ear or another viewpoint. We all share the love our little Grey souls share with us and the respect and caring we share with each other. I would trust Jay and Maggie, Dan, Dave, and Ray just for starters with my flock you have all shown yourselves to be caring, considerate and have great trusting relationships with your flocks. Thsi forum is our bird safe place. Thank you all for being here.

[EllieMae]

Hmm.. This is a good question. The fact is No the thought never entered my mind. I had researched Greys for about a year and had planned on trying to volunteer in a rescue for a while to learn with experience and then if I still wanted one I'd try to get one from a rescue. I had assumed that any rescues would be older birds but now know that I was wrong.Well as usual.. plans went astray and I got Leo upon hearing about him and the conditions he was living in. Then of course I got Sassy. As for who would take them when I cannot care for them, I hate to admit it but I never thought that far ahead. My oldest son loves all my birds but as much as I love him, I know him.. He would not take the care for them seriously. He would want them because he thinks they are cool and I'd bet my life that he'd be trying to get them high as he's a stoner. My youngest is the more responsible, an MP in the Army but doesn't really care for birds. You guys really have me thinking now...

[danmcq]

As for now, I think I will give instructions that if something happens to me, my family will post on the forum that Biscotti needs a new caregiver & that someone who knows greys will take him & keep him or find a suitable home for him.

 

That is a perfect idea. Maybe take it one step further and solidify a person here that would agree to take Biscotti should the time arise that you could no longer take care of him. Thats what I and another member here agreed to do together over a year ago should the need arise by either of us. That way, we are both covered.