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The honeymoon is over.......


DanielaWelborn

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....he is biting me like crazy every time I get him out of his cage.

I am getting tired of it, but I can't quit. If I resent him and not take him out everything will get that much worse.

I am thinking of wearing a glove or just opening the door and let him climb out. Just for a "cool down" period where he can't bite me and I won't get upset.

I know how to get him back in; the peanuts are still working like a charm.

Although I noticed today that he tried to eat his food from the outside of the cage. I made it a point to not close the door and he came back out.

Persistence, patience and love.

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You do not have to keep taking the bites. He is trying to tell you that he is not interested in being handled. I thought that I needed to get my rehomed CAG to step up and let me remove her from her cage..it does not have to be this way. Since I have changed my expectation and allow Shadow to come out on her own, our relationship has improved greatly! If I want to relocate her I have begun to use a "step up stick" which she gladly responds to AND I do not get bit! She is a gem and eager seeks me out we have just agreed that I will not push myself on her. Physical tough was something that I wanted..she did not and since I have accepted this reality, everything is so much better. Hang in there. Loving a Grey can be the most rewarding experience ever, but it often presents the most frustration as well.

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I'm new here, but have a few suggestions… (many I've learned from here, anyways!)

 

Positive reinforcement! Praise! Happy noises! All of these things can help to let your Parrot know that what they're doing at the time they're doing it is what you want them to be doing, and they get the thanks they need and deserve for being a "good bird!"

 

I've seen it more difficult, in CAGs to make a strong connection or bond right away with praise, treats, and positive reinforcement techniques, but this process takes time. They demand a trusting relationship to insure that their handler is not going to drop, hurt, or break their hearts. A few techniques I feel that have helped me to get over the biting are: 1.) The Iron Fist. Tuck your thumb under your other fingers and make a tight fist that stretches your skin and leaves the back plan of your hand exposed but not vulnerable. Bring it toward the bird, and notice his reactions to this - eye pinning, stance, feathers etc - when he lunges at you, try not to flinch, and "take the nip," since your hand is stretched, he/she will have little to latch on to, and will only graze/hit slightly. You will notice the second nip/bite is less pronounced, as he/she is seeing that you (eventually) are "leader of the flock."

 

2.) Positive reinforcement. Every time you do get them to step up or do something you like, give them something they enjoy i.e. a treat, praise, and so on.

 

I'm new to African Greys, but have a Red Lorry and have a Cockatiel. Given, CAGs are much MUCH different than either, but these techniques have helped me to build a relationship that helps me to handle my CAG more, which from the beginning of our relationship, has changed tremendously.

 

I'm sure others will have a bunch more to tell you, and that your efforts with your Grey will not go unnoticed or be made in vain!

 

Good luck. Keep up the love! Let us know how it turns out, yeah?

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My experience was like CLB's. I tried to get Timber (rehomed TAG) to step up immediately after I got him. The first couple of times, he did. After a few days, the honeymoon was over and he started biting me when I tried to get him to step op. Based on advice I read on this forum. I just started leaving his door open and not trying to get him to step up. When he started trusting me and I wanted to try again, I followed more advice I read here and remembered to never ask him to step up unless I was going to take him somewhere he wanted to go so it would be a positive experience for him. Now, we are doing well. He's bitten me a couple of times, but he had his reasons!

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I have a question in regards to this matter. :) Our CAG nibbles me and its doesnt hurt its more of a hey whats this ear when she is on my shoulder... and a cooing when she does it... yet with my boyfriend she seems to get him hard sometimes. This morning she was all happy and singing with me - let my bf get her out of her cage to bring her in for our morning shower.. than when he came in to get ready for work he went to say good morning to her and had her step up and she snaped at him and got him and she was clearly upset. I tried to calm her and intervene which she than get me. He got kinda upset and put her away. I have come to the conclusion that she trusts me and she is still working on getting there with him. He has a quaker that is VERY attached to him and I think this maybe why she has kinda rejected him. Any advice on how to help build their bond so the bf isnt to jealous of her relationship with me and so he doesnt get discouraged? I dont want to skimp on my time with our CAG but dont want him upset either.

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4 years, I am the third owner, the last owner had him for 3 years.

I decided for now to avoid all confrontation and just open up the cage door and let him come out by himself and then fill his food bowls and eventually he will get back in. I then "reward" him with a peanut. We both do not need any more bad experiences. At the same time he deserves his daily out of the cage time.

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Daniela, I believe you are making the right choice to back away a little and give Jellybean some space. I am not too sure about the open cage policy what I tried to do with Gilbert in the beginning was give him a little freedom at a time. In the first weeks I limited his time out of the cage just to night time and praised him greatly when he came out and again when he went back in, I gave him an almond in the shell as a bed time treat. My rationale behind that was to have a tool on my side that if he refused to go back in when I asked, I could turn off the lights for a minute and he was ready to go inside for night night. For the most part, I would let him out a couple of hours before my own bedtime. A half hour before bedtime, I would give him clues by turning off one lamp at a time kind of like getting dark in nature gradually. That gave him a routine he came to expect and when I got to only one light on, he was happy to comply when I asked him to go night night. He was not nearly as compliant as Jellybean has been right from the start. Her change in behavior may be her signal that she is getting too much too fast. I was guilty of wanting a wonderful relationship right from day one and as I learned and had setbacks, I came to understand her subtle clues. You are doing beautifully with her, trust your instincts and set up short positive interactions and build on that, you are going to have a much shorter learning curve than Gilbert and I have had.

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totally believe in just opening the cage and allowing your pet to come out on its own instead of taking the nips :) sounds like a perfect solution! I let marco do EITHER lol I just go with what shes "giving me" in energy times she just grab my hand other times shes climbing the cage door on her own and I just let her ...

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DaniellaWellborn... I agree with aerial. Open the cage, let Jellbean climb out and sit on the door. Bond with her on the door.She is old enough to appreciate any attempt by you to develop " trust". The best advice I received when I was " picked" by Sophie to be her rehomed parent at age two... was " always listen to your bird!" Sophie taught me everything I needed to do. Nancy

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FreyaRuRu Just a baby!So much fun!As baby trusts you better, practicing stepup and down, will be your responsibility. Move baby away from cage, transfer stepup to boyfriend. ( ALWAYS away from cage.) Have baby step backup to you after a few seconds. Hangout together, let baby see you bond.When baby is ever stressed, return to cage. Watch eye pinning.

I'm a firm believer, any new baby should be allowed wrist status only, until they understand biting is not appreciated or tolerated. I stuck to my guns when Sophie came home here at age two. It took six months . It was worth all the work both the kids and myself exerted.She loves all of us. ( of course... she knows what she can get away with each individual!) LOL!

After a decade of having Sophie, I will always get a kick out of her thinking she is a " queen". She is! She LOVES herself to death! She also is the leader of our flock, including dogs. What she says... goes. She also is very fair with her decisions. When it comes to new toys, she provides very little for herself. Sunny gets all bell toys, Kiki gets all large chewable toys. Nancy

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Nancy... Yes, we are enjoying her and her learning. She is really good with step up unless of course she doesnt want to ;) She lets you know. Yes, he is finally not going to place her on his shoulder and have her earn it. He was just so use to Ruru already having that right.

 

I am glad all the hard work has paid off with Sophie. I am sure it will with Freya too. Freya has that 'I am Queen' pose! We laugh because we just know she is going to at some point boss the dogs around and tell them "no"... that day will be funny. :) Thats so cute about the toys! Our two are still working out who is in charge. They get along for the most part but i see the day coming when Freya wont let him come in her home anymore. Right now Ruru loves all her food and toys (even though the food is that same!) and sneaks in whenever we turn around.

 

Kristal

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You will be surprised what birds work out. Sophie is the queen bee, but Sophie, Sunny and Kiki share their cages. I can find Sophie and Sunny together, or Kiki and Sunny together. I have found all three together sitting on Sunny's rope. I can travel to bird groomer with all three in one cage, no big deal. My groomer is amazed, asked me what I did for this to happen? I didn't do anything! They worked it out. Kiki and Sophie, do fight at times. Verbally. They never hurt each other physically.

Sophie is more fond of the dogs than Kiki or Sunny. Sophie will sneak in my purse and steal chapstick or lipstick that Zoey loves. When I hear " here you go Zoey", I know Sophie has stolen chapstick or lipstick and given it to Zoey. I come running!I have found Zoey with a very pink face, way too many times too count! Nancy

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The Grey, will always rule. Once other birds understand this, life gets much better! Sophie rules quite nicely. Kiki went thru a " molt", was ignoring Sunny our sunconure.( they are bonded). Sunny was sad that Kiki wouldn't snuggle him for a few months. He was also losing weight. I found Sophie snuggling him several nights. She is kind to our dogs, sharing her peanuts. Who ever heard of a dog loving peanuts. Nancy

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Quick update;

my strategy worked. We have a much better relationship. I do believe Jellybeans enjoys when I am talking to him. When he is not in the mood I just stop and try again later. He has daily out of cage time.

At the same time I have to be able to get him to step up and remove him from a spot that is not appropriate. I do wear a leather glove which Jellybean hated at first, but makes me feel much better and confident.

One time he flew into our bedroom and landed on a very low lamp. I was able to get him to step up on my hand and guide him out of the "danger zone". It is very slow going, but I got into this with no expectations so anything he is giving me is wonderful. It has only been about a month or so, the bird will hopefully be with me until I die. No rush:)

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