One step forward, 5 steps back

[MissOMalley]

Emmy and Dutch were doing sooo well until tonight. Dutch has been singing, talking and whistling the past couple days. He would even take almonds from my hands sometimes. I still cant such him, which is expected and fine.

 

Emmy, is about 20 yrs old and has never been handled. We believe she was abused. She was really starting to come around. She would take almonds from my hand since day 1. Today, she let me touch her beak briefly, and started to put her head down so i would touch her neck. I hesitantly touched her once, she was ok with it at first but then warned me away. Again, expected and fine.

 

Well, since Emmy has no feet, its obviously difficult for her to get around in the cage. She basically stays i n the bottom on blankets. We decided to put in some tile on the bottom...she was fine and seemed to like it. Then we took some rope/twine type stuff and made a "ladder" for her since shes terrified of all the ladders i bought her. She loves the rope. She was climbing it and making all kinds of cute sounds. She seemed HAPPY with the changes, not stressed. Well, then we put in an extra large perch/level. That didnt go over so well...at all. She started screaming and launching herself at me , her cage...everything and anything. There was no calming her down. By the end of her ordeal she had scratched the inside of her wing. It barely bled. I called the vet and she said to monitor it, but she should be fine...that shed likely just hurt herself more if i tried to get her out to be seen by the vet.

 

Now Emmy hates me, and i think shes in pain. She hisses anytime i come near. Dutch is also stressed from witnessing the ordeal. I cant even walk into the room (my bedroom for temporary quarantine) without them hissing and shaking. Neither will take treats. I am just beyond annoyed at the situation. It is so frustrating trying to help a poor animal that can not be reasoned with or calmed down. I have rehabilitated and tamed countless dogs, cats, rodents and reptiles. Its what I do....but i have never felt so helpless and frustrated as i do right now. I know its not their fault at all...its mine. I just hope one day theyll forgive me. I have a lot of respect for people who have success rehabilitating these birds. It is physically and emotionally exhausting! Whew! Really needed to vent!!

 

Here are a couple videos from the other day...a much better day!

 

Dutch-

 

Emmy-

Edited November 3, 2012 by MissOMalley
changed video links

[JeffNOK]

Please don't be discouraged. You have experienced a setback, but this too will pass. I don't have any experience with rescues or abused birds, but I experienced a few setbacks early on with my grey and I felt very upset about it--like I just ruined everything. That was not the case and I have faith that things will return to normal soon and you will make advances. One thing you have learned from this experirence is to take things more slowly and not to change too many things too soon. The best thing you can do is to settle yourself and come around with a new sense of optimism--I know that may seem difficult, but your grey senses your emotions and if you are calm and hopeful that will be contagious. You obvioulsy have a great love and respect for all living creatures and have worked successfully with many species. Parrots are very different from cats, dogs and reptiles. I know you know that--but remind yourself that you are on a journey together and your bird will lead the way. Keep us posted on your progress from here--I know you will see some light at the end of this tunnel. You feel discouraged because you care so much. That is a quality that will help you find your way.

Edited November 2, 2012 by JeffNOK

[Timbersmom]

Yes, what Jeff said. They will get over it. Hang in there and keep the faith! I can remember a couple of times after I rehomed Timber that I was at my wit's end, and was thinking I made a horrible mistake. However, slow and steady wins the day with greys. They seem to take a lot longer to adjust and adapt than most other animals, which is why you see "grey time" on the forum so often.

[katana600]

Dutch and Emmy are building a frame of reference for you in their life experience. Every day when you are calming and gentle with them will help them move forward in your home and their new life. It is frustrating and confusing at first, but I promise, it does get better. The hardest part for us was learning that sometimes doing nothing is what Gilbert needed from us until he got to a place where he could come toward us instead of being so paralyzed with anxiety. It has taken a year and a half of backing off, trying again and repeating the process but we are just starting to see improvement an that makes all the time and errors fade into the past. Dutch and Emmy look lovely in their new cages. (I couldn't view the mobile version on youtube, but when I deleted the "m." on the address bar and refreshed, it came right up.)

[MissOMalley]

Thank you everyone. I really appreciate the wisdom and encouragment. Dutch is starting to come around again...he took an almond from me this morning. He wakes me up at 5am everymorning. He goes to the bottom of his cage and shreds his newpaper...all the while saying "hi pretty! Hahahaha". His laugh is hilarious! Dutch definitely was sensing my frustration last night. I was cleaning his cage last night and wasnt talking to him...He just looked at me and said " whats the matter pretty?" Im not sure how he knew to say that, or if it was coincidence...but it made my heart melt. I just want these creatures to be happy, healthy and stress free...but they sure dont make it easy!

 

Emmy, well..shes more stressed now then her first day home...she still hisses when i get in her cage, which she started after the perch debacle. She did however take an almond from me today and didnt throw it back at me! She was to the point that when i opened her cage door she'd poke her head out and whistle at me. Now she waddles away and tries to bite when i clean her cage:(

 

I just wish I could fast forward time!!!

[judygram]

Well you suffered a little setback but nothing that can't be fixed with some time and patience, this happens to most all of us especially the ones with rehomed greys but do not let it upset you for now you have seen that if you are stressed and frustrated they will pick up on that. You are doing great so far and if you continue to go on this path you will reap wonderful rewards, it just takes time but well worth the effort.

[katana600]

Rachel there is an ebb and flow to life with a parrot, Emmy and Dutch have had a whole lot of life experience before you came. You have such a good heart and perceptive instincts, they are just way ahead of you and have you outnumbered. Please don't fast forward on us, you would miss too many fabulous pinnacles of success and joy. Having two at once has its advantages, when Emmy is hissing and giving you the stink eye, Dutch is calling you sweet names to take the sting out just a little. When we had two little girls, I used to say that we were given total opposites for a reason, one to make me happy and one to make me humble. Humble because I learned that the one or the other making me happy at any given moment was not really a credit to me doing things right, but that I didn't "cause" the happiness, I was just being blessed with it for a time. You are doing a great job, it just takes a long time to see the fruits of your efforts with a parrot, they are unlike any other creature on earth. But when the rewards start to show, it is worth the wait.

[Acappella]

Just wondering how things are going?