Change her name?

[lisachristine]

Rosie, my 4 year old CAG, is a rescue bird that has had a horrible beginning to life. Although she is coming around (playing with toys, talking and eating well) I think she hates her name! I know that sounds weird, but every time you say her name she starts to tremble. Is changing her name a good or bad idea??

[alexispolicastro]

Awe poor baby! She's lucky to have you.. I don't think there's anything wrong with changing her name.. especially if she associates it with fear or upset.. unless u add a "sweet" or "baby" in front of Rosie... sometimes if they were screamed at by their previous owner they will think their name is a scolding instead of their name.. dogs are like that too.. whatever you do its a million times better that what she had before you and she'll start to know that just by the tone in your voice.. good luck and let us know how you make out... Alexis :-)

[Timbersmom]

I'd change her name. Like Alexis said, she may have bad associations with it and not even realize it is her name...

[birdhouse]

Sadly, there's nothing crazy about it. You may have just made a huge observation. Although you think of "Rosie" as her name, she's reacting to a voice cue that she's conditioned, apparently, to believe will be followed by something bad or scary.

 

My TAG has also been abused. Unfortunately he was sick when I got him, too. He'd had a lot of traumatic handling by the time I started to try to get him to step up for me.

 

For the first few months he would rip me every single time I asked him to step up. But he was even more terrified of sticks & gloves. So I didn't really have a choice but to keep on getting badly bitten.

 

At some very low point, I was wrapping my dripping hand & thinking that Phenix may really really never be handle-able. During my little pity party, I started to replay all my failures w/him. Then something clicked. He was truly terrified of my hands. But he wouldn't flash out & bite until I said, "Up".

 

I went back out, gave him a little nudge & said "Foot". He shook when he climbed onto my hand. But it was the very first time ever that he'd done it w/o biting me! (I still get the chills just remembering)

 

I think it might be a great idea to lose Rosie's name, in this case! Usually you combine old + new name when you're changing over. But it this case, I think the sooner it's gone the better. You might say "Hey Baby" or something to get Rosie's attention for the moment. They respond to tone of voice more than words, anyway. Then start to use her new name to give her love & treats & all good things.

 

I'd be surprised if she didn't continue to quake at the attention for a while. But if you can convince her that things are going to be different, she should start doing it less & less.

Edited August 16, 2012 by birdhouse

[Sarasota]

I don't think you'll have a problem at all. After all, we give dogs new names when they come home from the shelter, etc. I had to keep Burt, Burt. Well, he loves his name and says it all the time. Plus, it's cute.

[Timbersmom]

That was a real insight you had there Birdhouse, and something for all of us new "rehomers" to remember! I hadn't thought about words you know they understand having that kind of effect, but it makes total sense. Sure glad you figured it out and thanks for the heads up for the rest of us. I know Timber hates sticks, gloves and towels, but didn't think about it being the word itself.

[Luvparrots]

I believe it is a great idea in this case to give your grey a new name. New life, new name, great future.

[chezron]

I vote for new name too!

[birdhouse]

That was a real insight you had there Birdhouse, and something for all of us new "rehomers" to remember ...think about it being the word itself.

 

I went off to the bathroom in tears that day & it didn't have (much) to do w/my hand. I think I'd just gotten desperate enough to finally see what was right in front of me all along. But they are so complex that sometimes it's nearly impossible to see the whole picture. I was hung up by the fact that Phenix is afraid of hands & for very good reason. I just couldn't see past it until I was driven to that point.

 

"It takes a village to raise a child." Sometimes, it takes a fresh perspective see what's really going on w/our own fids' issues because their pain can become ours & we can get just as lost in it. Back when parronts had to find that perspective on their own. But that's why Grey Forums is so awesome! I'm so glad that new parronts have resources like this where they can share all kinds of things now. And the moral support is just a big fat bonus!

Edited August 16, 2012 by birdhouse