SaladNinja Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 I've always dealt with both anxiety and depression, but recently I've been incapacitated by my panic attacks and generalized anxiety disorder. I'm so worried about moving to Hawaii for grad school, about how I'm going to afford to pay back my student loans after I graduate, about how I'm going to afford my credit card payments this summer...*sigh* I guess money is an issue for almost everyone, I just wish I wasn't so crippled by my constant worry about it. I see a psychologist regularly, and I'm on Cymbalta, Abilify, and Klonopin for my anxiety and depression. Does anyone else here deal with any psychological disorders? Sometimes it really helps to not feel so alone. Love, SaladNinja Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayd Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 Your not alone and never will be on this forum. Congratulations, were so proud of you and all your doing, it takes a big person to ask for help for themselves.....We've been there, still are. Cymbalta and Xanax. etc... Jay and Maggie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acappella Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 You're definately not alone. I've dealt with depression since my teens. (I'm almost 46) I was diagnosed with bipolar2 disorder when I was 21 and I've been on medication since then, aside from a brief period in my 30's when I went off it under Dr. Supervision. I build up a tolerance to meds pretty quickly so I'll get on a med, stabalize, start to go down, increase dosage, until I'm at maximum dosage. Then it's time to try a new med. This spring I was placed on a psychiatric hold for the first time ever, just for 18 hours, because of ongoing stress and suicidal thinking. I've also dealt with panic attacks. I had them under control for about 7 yrs but they came back with a bang this winter. So I know what you're dealing with. I can tell you what works for me. Since I've been dealing with this disease for so long, I know what the signs are that my mood is deteriorating. eg. Not singing along with the radio, not wanting to play piano or music. Or I'll be driving along on a perfectly nice day and have a random thought like 'I could drive into that tree'. I know to reach out for help right away, not to try to tough it out or pull myself out of it 'cause I know it doesn't work. I mean, seriously, would you try to cure yourself of appendicitis? I always have the phone #'s of distress lines at hand. I also have a doctor who works with me and listens to me. My close friends all know that I struggle sometimes and know to take me seriously if I tell them I'm in trouble. When you shed a light on depression and mental illness you take away some of it's power. I have a friend who also has clinical depression. He believes the worst thing the disease of depression does is it tries to isolate you, so the biggest thing you can do to fight it is to build a support network that is a big and as strong as possible. When he is down and not feeling like going out to meet with friends he tells himself that it is the disease, trying to cut him off from people, and that helps him put one foot in front of the other and get out the door. So keep reaching out. It does help. <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talon Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 Thank ou for haring this with us everyone, for those of us who have not experienced this first hand, but know of others that do, it is wonderful to have this type of insight and understanding.....I will continue to follow this thread and learn and REMEMBER all I have learned so that I can be more enlightened and u derstNding for those that suffer with this illness. Again, thank you.... Although I am sorry for all you have to handle...makes me feel selfish when I complain about the little things in my life..on those days, you will be in my thoughts... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
judygram Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 The thing to remember is you are not alone in this disorder as you have plenty of company, sometimes it seems we have such overwhelming obstacles to deal with on a daily basis and some handle it better than others, no harm in admitting you need help as we all do need some at one time or another so if you feel the need to vent then by all means unload on us as we are her to listen and not judge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kins2321@yahoo.com Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 I also, suffer from chronic depression, all of my friends would never know, as I am the life of the party, and the first person to get invited to the party. They know I " pick" the party I go to, but they don't know, its how I feel at the moment. It has nothing to do with the person, having the party. Working on that with a therapist. I'm not embarrassed that I have a problem that is chemically unbalanced. Nancy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CathyJr Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 My panic attacks started after I had 4 family members pass in one year, I took zoloft for about 20 years i just weaned myself off of it this year and so far im still ok, I understand how you feel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingy Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 We are here to be your cheerleader, hold your hand, lend an ear or give you a kick in the rear. You know the tricks of breaking big problems down into manageable chunks so find your comfortable place and start to break it down. You can do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chezron Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Anxiety totally sucks and I, too, deal with it. I exercise daily because it takes the edge off, it makes it better. Plus, I just discovered a supplement called 5-HTP which supports serotonin synthesis. Anyway, your body makes it naturally, but sometimes not enough. I take one 50 mg anytime I am freaking out. No, it is not a drug and you can't take too much. It is pretty amazing! i am going through a VERY stressful time and this helps a lot. I am also in grad school and it is not a party, let me tell you. Please have faith that it will all work out. You also have the support of your husband which is extremely important. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chezron Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Hey Salad Ninja, I did a little more research on 5-HTP and maybe i shouldn't have recommended it carte blanche. You definitely shouldn't take it if you are already taking an anti-depression medication. So ignore that part of my advice. The exercise thing is still a good idea, as is yoga and meditation. Andrew Weill suggests SAMe and kava kava as safe supplements for depression and anxiety. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SaladNinja Posted June 11, 2012 Author Share Posted June 11, 2012 I do a lot of yoga and meditation after taking a class last semester, and it really does help. I've also used kava before, while I lived abroad in Samoa in the South Pacific. Wonderful stuff! Thanks for all your advice and support, everyone Today has been a rough day for me. I'm really homesick; my family all lives in Illinois. I'll get to see them at the end of July, but it's hard living out here with just Cody. We're still relatively new to the area and we don't really have any friends, so while he's at work it's just me and the Noodle-meister. I think just the boredom is part of what gets to me sometimes; I don't have anything to do but sit and stew in all my worry. Not to mention that Cody's paycheck is 3 days late in the mail for some reason, so we are completely broke and possibly overdrawn in our bank account. I started off the summer with over $1500 from graduation gifts, and its already gone just from bills and trying to survive. I was hoping to save all of that for the move to Hawaii; I don't know how we'll survive without any money to kick-start things. I also accidentally missed my counseling appointment today, which I was really looking forward to. Just a sucky, cloudy day here in Ohio. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayd Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 (edited) chezron Wonderful post, thank you....Jay Edited June 11, 2012 by Jayd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingy Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 I bet there are many things to do that are no cost. Take a walk in the historic or oldest sections of your city and take pictures of the oddities in the architecture, learn about what your city/town is known for or proud of, what are the regional foods? Around here it is festival season and every festival offers free entertainment of some kind. Call the chamber of commerce or grab one of those free papers and see whats going on. If you would like more personal activity volunteer to help with a few meals at a shelter or food panty. They can almost always use the help and are generally a friendly bunch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acappella Posted June 13, 2012 Share Posted June 13, 2012 Like my friend Dan says, when he is invited to go out and doesn't feel like being social he tells himself that is the disease trying to bully him, to isolate him. He posted this on facebook a couple of days ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingy Posted June 13, 2012 Share Posted June 13, 2012 Depression definitely does not play fair. My partner has been suffering from depression for close to 4 years and refuses to see that is what it is. The past 2 years it has grown to include anxiety over traveling in the car, having friends over, spending time away from home or talking to anyone other than the kids outside of work. My partner rarely goes out except to go to work, a few local restaurants and the county fair. Going grocery shopping has been the major event for the past several years. That my partner has gone to the bird store with me has been a small miracle. For the past 4 years I travel and vacation alone or with my DS and have no friends left except those that live far away. I am hoping that our baby TAG will enrich both of our lives and maybe help to bring my partner back. If not then at least I won't be quite so lonely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danmcq Posted June 13, 2012 Share Posted June 13, 2012 Never had Depression, but had anxiety attacks for about 2 years back when I was working 80 hours a week and traveling the world almost non-stop installing, troubleshooting and programming visual and robotic systems. First thing the doctor did (that gave me even more anxiety) was want to do an mri with a tumor being a possibility. Once that was all clear, Xanax and Paxil for 2 years before I no longer needed. The anxiety was almost crippling in the sense I did not want to go to work, but just did it anyway put up with the panic attacks as I drove, flew or was in the office. People probably wondered what was wrong with this figidity guy acting all nervous... So hang in there and just keep on keeping on knowing that one day it will subside. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayd Posted June 14, 2012 Share Posted June 14, 2012 Maggie's on a low dose of Cymbalta, thanks to me. Due to many illnesses I have that flair up, I have stress attacks, but I'm afraid to take the Xanax. Only sleep a couple of hours a night.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kins2321@yahoo.com Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Jayd... take the Xanax. Get some sleep. I have no reason to be depressed, so when I met a councelor for the first time, she identified, I take care of the kids, I take care of the birds and dogs, I have minimal help from my ex. I give and give. I refused her thought that I get nothing in return, because I do. I am very social, have lots of friends, but can't keep up with my friends expectations.( due to the depression). I have learned, I don't need too! I need to commit, when I can really commit. When I feel good. I don't always have to be the life of the party. I have commited to a party on July 3rd. I will follow thru. I also have a party on the fourth. Not committing! Nancy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kittykittykitty Posted June 24, 2012 Share Posted June 24, 2012 When I was working behavioral medicine I thought I knew what depression was. I even intervened and stopped two suicides. But I didn't really know. It was only when I became ill, was two-three years into the illness and saw no light at the end of the tunnel, only a black tunnel I learned. I was suicidal, had a plan. I was visiting cousins and decided I wouldn't put them through finding me and called my MD. (I use alternative medicine if at all possible.) While waiting for the remedy to arrive I did promise I would call the MD before doing anything. The remedy worked for me. It happened one more time, but again the remedy worked. Not suicidal any more. If I think I am becoming depressed I ask my neuropsychologist for a reality check. I don't share this often. I hope it helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sassy Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 Massage is also extremely beneficial in the treatment and management of anxiety and depression. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarasota Posted July 26, 2012 Share Posted July 26, 2012 Oh my gosh, Sweetie. I'm just getting used to the forums, catching up on threads and I just saw this one. You are, for sure, not alone. I've been struggling with some major medical issues for the last 2 years and there are times when I just want to hang it all up. I so get it. I am sending you giant cyber hugs and wishing you well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timbersmom Posted July 26, 2012 Share Posted July 26, 2012 I just saw this thread. You are certainly not alone as you can see by all the posts! When I was 21 I was diagnosed with panic disorder. I'm 54 now (55 next month) and have been medicated most of that time. The last 25 or so years I've taken Xanax. I'm not a fan of medicating, but without it my hyperventilating episodes are horrible and frequent. So, it is what it is. While I'd prefer not to be medicated, you have to do a sort of risk vs. benefit analysis within yourself. I, for one, am must more productive and happy when I'm medicated. As others have said, there are things you can do to help yourself. For me, exercise helps and distracting myself with something involved helps (anything that gets my mind off my mind so to speak). The thing that helps the most though is prayer. I start praying and peace comes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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