NatJ Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 ok so we got our grey max 4 days ago...yes i know a short time... his previous owner was female so she told me max would warm to me much more as he HATES males.... Ive been gaining his trust, he lets me clean his cage now & change his food & water without biting me... still wont step up or let me touch him or he will go in for a bite... hHowever....last night my husband was jus jus talking to max through his cage & max lowerd his head for john to stroke him & he actually let him...OMG why will he let john stoke him & i cant go near him ???? I thought he was ment to be petrified of males, im really upset, does he not like me, even tho i do everything for him, will i never b able to handle my maxey baby????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katana600 Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 How old is Max? We got Gilbert almost three months ago at the age of 7 to 10 years. His caretaker at the time is a woman, and one of his previous owners was a man. He didn't warm up to Sarah after two years, but came in with either a modicum of tolerance to me, the mom of the household. He would swipe at my husband or daughter but I keep working with him, using my favored status to continue to encourage him to be buddies with everyone in the family for his own good should I not be available. He will step up for my husband but is still in a big hurry to get back on his cage. If I am not home, my daughter is a reasonable substitute for a very careful, guarded head scratch while he clings to his cage. It has been such a short time, I believe if you talk to Max every day, don't push too hard for him to come to you until he is ready, you will build a trust with him and tho you may or may not ever be the heartthrob rockstar favorite, you will have an equally delightful relationship with a magnificent companion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thenabrd Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 we've had kallie for a few months now. we are her new forever home and she's just over 2 1/2. she was raised by an older woman, no men living in the household. this woman's daughter cared for kallie and the other birds in her former home while finding new homes for them (the older woman passed away). kallie likes me well enough, lets me give her head rubs, cheek rubs, clean and care for her food/water and cage. BUT she's "discovered" my husband and at this point he's her "one and only". yes it hurt for a bit, but i was thrilled that she chose him at all and so quickly and still allows me to care for her. we may choose our birds, but they are the ones that choose us. i'm sorry but that's the way it is. i know it's "hurtful" when they want someone else more than us, but at least you are favored in that he lets you do things for him. even though my husband is her true heart's desire, i still love her to pieces and wouldn't change a thing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
judygram Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 You have only had Max for 4 days so don't judge these little incidents as it will take much longer for him to pick any favorites if he does have a favorite, keep talking and doing what you are doing to help him and allow him time to unpack his baggage but if he does pick your husband as his favorite then it doesn't mean you are left out in the cold. Greys can be fickle about who they like the best and there is not much you can do to change their minds so its best to accept what Max decides and go with it. It is much too early in the relationship to admit failure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 My Amazon has chosen my boyfriend, and my Grey and lovebird have chosen me. I'm happy one of them adores him because it makes him feel much more involved and committed to the bird population here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ranaz Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Its only been 4 days and thats too early to judge. Probable your husband aroused his interest. Just be patient and keep talking to him and give him treats. It will take time for greys to bond but sometimes, its love at first sight... you never know. With time, he will get used to you and build some trust hopefully. Try to make yourself interesting for him, singing, smiling, be a little noisy but dont scare him... if he is amused he will get closer to you... and food... use his favorite stuff to make him come to you... I used seeds, almonds and peanuts... G :) D Luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talon Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 You need to relax......let him do as he pleases and stop having so many expectations and getting upset when he doesn't behave in the manner in which you expect. If you don't this bird will develop problems with you and I can see you wanting to rehome him down the road........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvparrots Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 You need to relax. Our greys are very sensitive and most likely Max feels your anxiety and is reacting to it. You should calm down and start again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danmcq Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 As Dee (Katana) asked, how old is Max? The others all gave great advice. Max has been in your home such a small amount of time that you cannot tell anything yet. If possible, have your husband take part in feeding and cleaning the cage as well. Right now it seems you are the only one invading "His Space", namely the cage. That is his safety blanket right now in this strange new environment and new people etc. Only time, patience and love will expose the real personality of Max. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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