Yoshi's Future - Trying to find a good home

[jessdecutie18]

So this is going to be a difficult post to do. I've honestly not had the heart to be on the GreyForums much in the last two months. Things just haven't been good here.

 

For those that know me, they know that I love my African Grey Timneh very much. Yoshi means the world to me and I want the best for her always. I'm also married, and I want the best for my husband too. Most know of the issues I've had with Yoshi yelling and constant attention seeking. She doesn't like my husband, just me. She can be the cutest, most fun, exciting, friendly, and lovable bird around if she is in the middle of the action, getting attention from me and from guests, etc etc. Yet a few minutes alone, and she feels abandoned and yells and screams and has picked up a lot of weird noises. She hates being alone. She wants to be out all day with the family. Mike is tired of trying, completly fed up with Yoshi's noise. He honestly feels like its him or the bird that needs to leave. It's a tense, frustrating, torturing situation. I have come to terms with the fact that she needs a new home with a caring family that have bird experience and that can pay a lot of attention to her. She really demands it. The problem is finding someone. I just want her to be happy. I'm going to feel horrible forever if I can't find someone who will care for her properly. It's so hard...

 

I've had her on Craigslist pretty cheap, I've listened to tons of people's stories and ideas of what they want to do with Yoshi and Yoshi has even met about 5 people. But most people on Craigslist just want a cheap deal, or don't know a thing about birds, or aren't willing to meet up a few times and get to know each other before discussing rehoming Yoshi. I've actually also had several people reply to me saying this is so sad, they can see how much I love the bird and wish I could keep her. They can see how much it hurts to get rid of her and how important it is to me that she is taken care of and has lots of out of cage time and showers and that her wings aren't clipped again and that she eats well... but you know life sucks sometimes and with the problems going on in our house if I really just think about Yoshi, its in her best interest to be with someone else. I'll miss the hell out of her, and want pictures and updates, but I'll be satisfied if I know she is in good hands. I was asking $800 for her, the huge cage, the stands, toys, harness, and everything else that is hers in our house. Pretty good considering we have spent about $2000 on her. But she needs to be worked with. Basically she just needs an overload of attention, a lively (but not hectic) household, and a lot of love. She talks a lot, nothing bad thank goodness. She has been picking up a lot of squeaks and whistles lately, and has started saying things in both my voice and my husband's deeper voice.

 

In November Yoshi went to this one really nice lady for 2 weeks who wanted to pay me monthly because she said she didn't have much money at the time. I said that was fine. The money isn't the important part. We had been calling each other and texting each over and she sounded like such a nice, genuine lady, I really hoped she would be the one. She worked from home and had a little girl who was also super excited about Yoshi. It broke my heart to see Yoshi go, I was sure this was the end. I was a bit of a mess for a couple days, and my husband got frustrated because he couldn't make me feel better. He even said for me to get her back then if it was going to be that bad for me. But I held out, just said it was going to take a while to get over that loss. I was in constant contact with the lady. At first apparently Yoshi was quiet and spooked easily but by the end of the two weeks she was fitting in, talking, barking like their dog, having a good time. She was sharing apples with the lady's daughter and the lady was impressed at how socialized Yoshi seemed after getting over the initial fear of the house. She said Yoshi was noisy but that the noise fit in over there and was fine. Yet then she calls me to say Yoshi's food ran out (the food I brought over) and she couldn't afford more. Couldn't afford $25 for some food? Long story short she was a nice lady but was in financial problems and should never have tried to adopt another pet. I brought food over and she said she would pay me the next week. But the end of the week came and she didn't have the money. She actually told me she was worried that she would lose the apartment because she was behind on payments. This all scared me very much, so 3 weeks there and we went to collect Yoshi and bring her home. Not at all how I wanted that to go. She was fitting in there and then I had to take her back because the lady had no money for her and wouldn't have money for a long time.

 

Having her home again was bittersweet. I honestly was so happy to see her again and that she still let me love on her. She gained some weight because they fed her a lot of junk food over there but a month later she is back to normal. Of course things at our house are problematic again. Mike wants her gone ASAP. I'm trying to find someone... It's stressful. We moved off base to an apartment in Dec and still have some unpacking to do. We leave late Feb for two weeks to spend with family as in June I deploy. I soooo wanted to find Yoshi a good home by now. I really need to find someone. I'm not sure about payments now after what happened with the lady. Also, I'm sure now to ask about financial situation and whether adopting an animal is a good idea for the individual at the time. I guess I'll just be highly stressed out until I can find a happy resolution for this.

 

If any of you live anywhere near Florida and feel like you could help please let me know. Yoshi is such a sweet bird and really deserves a stable, happy household.

 

I apologize for abandoning the GreyForums for the last while, I've just had a heavy heart and haven't wanted to participate really. I need help though. I don't know whether to repost Yoshi on Craigslist again or not.

[birdhouse]

I'm reading this with tears in my eyes. I'm so sorry it's come to all this!

 

I think you should post Yoshi everywhere you can. On Grey Forums, Craig's List, Oodle, in the newspapers, etc. You've got time constraints, so take advantage of all the outlets you can find.

 

Some pet stores & feed & grains around here have a place to post fliers, too.

 

I think I can guess how hard this is for you. But it happens sometimes. Again, I'm sorry & I hope you find a great match up for Yoshi.

[Talon]

My heart is breaking for you.....there are so many loving homes, I am sure you will find one soon. Please don't let your husband pressure you into accepting a less than acceptable ome for Yoshi. Hang in there, you will find the right one, and I pray you will be happy about it. I went thru the same thing with a cat I rescued from near death and loved more than anything. My husband at the time made me get rid of her, I never forgot that and never forgave him...but that's a whole other story. (we're divorced now for different reasons)

Your in my thoughts and prayers....

[bran]

try Ebay Classifieds... that's where I got Dexter. I also know a couple friends in the Florida area, and I will forward this to them, and let's see what a phone/email tree can do. fingers crossed for you!

[judygram]

This is such sad news and I really feel for you but you do what you have to, I hope Yoshi finds a new forever home where she will be given the level of care and attention she needs and deserves, this is breaking my heart because I know how much she means to you.

[Greywings]

How painful for you all. Sorry hubby was not able to enjoy Yoshi as you do.

[Luvparrots]

I hope you are able to find the right home for Yoshi. I'm so sorry that this has happened to your family.

[caleigha]

What area of Florida are you in? We used to live in Central Florida - I can pass it along to friends as well.

[pearllyn]

So sorry Jess that you and Yoshi are going through this. I so wish we were closer and could help. A couple of things to keep in mind, although I know you will have thought of them, but it's easy to forget or overlook things when you are stressed, which I know you must be, to say the least. Don't advertise her too cheaply. I know time is a factor here, but advertising her cheap will only attract the wrong sort of person (that's not to say it wouldn't catch the right person's eye though), plus if you put a decent price tag on her, you know the person who answers that add, is going to look after her. Also, as Talon says, don't let anyone pressure you into letting her go to the first home that comes along, and don't be afraid to ask questions - you have every right to know if a potential home has the resources to look after your baby. It's not cheeky to ask " can you afford her?"...

You do have a little time before you deply, so just use it and have faith that the right person will hear you plea for hellp and give Yoshi the home you both deserve her to have. Best wishes to you both. xx

[rbpittman]

If I could get to Florida I would take her in a heart beat. Already having 2 CAGs and the rest of the flock my husband would probably kill me. I'm definitely in tears reading this however, I know it's tearing you up inside to have to go through this once much less twice. We'll have you and your husband and Yoshi in our prayers for the right person to come along and take Yoshi for a life time.

[reggieroo]

We all feel for you Jess & pray it all works out.

[jessdecutie18]

Thanks guys so much for the support. I live in Central Florida, near Patrick AFB.

[Morana]

Hello:-)

I wanted to say something that helped me in your situation. Two years ago my boyfriend moved from another part of Croatia to my city to be with me. To be exact, he moved in with me. My small apartment became even smaller+apartment is in very low attic. Since my CAG was here before him, his cage, perches, t-stands and toys occupy the highest part of the apartment and I could tell Zvone is not to thrilled to be crunching in the low part, because it is veeery low. We'll he is right. Neither of them should be deprived but we couldn't afford better. After a month or two, Zak became hormonal and territorial and he basically flipped out. Lounged at us for no apparent reason. He would hurt us so bad, my ears, hands, neck bled so bed as so did my boyfriends. Since I didn't know what to do, Zak was out of the cage while Zvone was at work (and I was really affraid of him) and inside when Zvone came home. Zak was accustomed to be out of the cage all day long, so when he was inside, he screamed as hell. This only made things worse. After time, Zvone gave my birdie the second chance and everything was fine for a little while. Then the biting, screaming, lounging began again. And the same procedure happened but this time I saw in my boyfriends eyes that he really means it when he says "him or me".. I had no choice. He was sometimes so mad on the bird that I thought he might hurt him. Of course that never happened but that look in his eyes when Zak bit him.. God!.. Well, Zak did know to bite him so hard he blackened his finger nails, or he couldn't move his hand for couple of days how bad it was. It was extremely bad with Zak back then. I searched internet and found site http://www.birdtricks.com. Christmas came (so I got some money) and I ordered taming, training and tricks package which came with a script which said something like this: If you haven't covered some basic needs of your bird, don't even start to train. You can't succeed. When I read the script, although it was simple I realized i neglected or, better yet, I didn't know how to solve some simple problems with my bird. And yes, my Zak was a screamer when he wanted to be. Now I was in search of all the things were mentioned in the script. After changing few simple things Zak became another bird in the matter of days! I was shocked. I was doing wrong so many things and wasn't even aware of it!! It was a revelation. You need to understand, all those things that he needed we don't have in Croatia so I searched internet for months and months and during that time raised money. Customs are horrible here. From package I learned how to get him to play with toys by himself and much, much more.. Half a year from then I ordered another package- Total parrot transformation and with it came lot of free goodies. Among that was "secrets" how to stop screaming, touch training, some free toys... I was extremely happy! I borrowed money to buy all of that.. The problem with the whole thing was: it said not to put your bird on a training diet (so you could train with him) unless you weigh your bird every day and track it. I even didn't have a digital scale. Everything was so expensive so I couldn't order it either. I got a bird scale just two months ago, made a T perch for it, a month ago and we are still in process on getting him on the t-perch without being too scared. So, two years passed and I still haven't begun to train him; but I implemented as many things I could from what I have read and I can tell you , I have totally new parrot! But, to be perfectly honest, I still haven't gone through all DVD-es I got, because in those two past years I had two surgeries, lot of physical therapy, I am still trying to finish college, I tutor whenever I can, and I cook and clean at home because I am pretty much at home while my boyfriend supports us. So I have still a looooot in front of me but with what I managed I achieved lot. Zak doesn't lounge at all, doesn't bite except when my boyfriend bullies him but then Zvone knows he deserved it and it is not bad biting as before. Zak is just trying to get rid of Zvone sometimes ;-) They have a new bond. Not a very healthy, if you ask me, but nevertheless a bond. I can't say it is a healthy bond because my boyfriend refuses to read anything about Zakica ( he is a stubborn ass sometimes (as I can be)) and he is trying to prove a point-that I should finally do what I set out to do-to train Zak). He doesn't even try to train Zak (I try to train a bit with positive reinforcement) but the worse thing is that most of the time he is bulling the bloody bird and I can't prove him wrong. He thinks they are playing! And they are playing, ...sometimes. Zak lets him do things that he doesn't let anyone else to do:-) Zak was simply ecstatic when Zvone came from holiday (he came a week after me). That bird loves him but Zvone doesn't now to read his body language and often messes things up. Zak unambiguously reacts to let him know how he feels but Zvone rarely figures out what Zak meant... Becuse of that I think is unhealthy relationship. I need to train booth of them and I can tell you, Zak is the easier one ;-)

So my story is about keeping both of them and trying my best to reconcile those two worlds the best I can. I know I will succeed. Hope you can too:-)

Good luck!

 

PS: you are in advantage because you live in US. My bird eats pellets only when I have money to import them. When he doesn't have pellets he is on a seed, (veggie) and fruit diet which I know is not much, but that's what we've got.. And I can tell you, you can't train a bird (at least I don't know how) when he is on a seed died because what the hell is a treat/reward gonna be.. :-S

 

PPS: Zak wants kisses, hugs, wants to play with us, doesn't bite,doesn't lounge, talk a lot, play by himself, screams very little and a whole lot more :-D