Jump to content
NEW ADDRESS FOR MEMBERS GREYFORUMS.ORG ×
NEW ADDRESS FOR MEMBERS GREYFORUMS.ORG

One for the girls (guys no looking)


Tari

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 205
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

I was hoping someone would send me something to fit in with this topic...lo and behold, leave it to my girlfriends to pull through in the 9th:

 

If you love something, set it free.

If it comes back, it will always be yours.

If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with.

 

But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money and doesn't appear to realize that you had set it free.....You either married it or gave birth to it! {Feel-good-000200BB}

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...
  • 2 months later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Top tips to pass on to your daughters

 

Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's still wearing nappies.

 

What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.

 

If they put one man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.

 

Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

 

Go for the younger man. You might as well - they never mature anyway.

 

Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

 

Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

 

Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

 

The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it.

 

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

 

If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

 

The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in Biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

 

If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him cheque books.

 

Remember a sense of humour does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

 

Sadly, all men are created equal.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

I got one!!!! And you will all love this one!

 

 

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, 'I'll leave the key under the

mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check .

 

Oh, by the way don't worry about my dog Spike. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!' 'I REPEAT; DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"

 

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking dog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work

 

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.

Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled,

 

'Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!'

 

 

 

To which the parrot replied, 'Get him, Spike!'

 

 

See - Men just don't listen!

 

{Feel-good-0002006E}

Link to comment
Share on other sites

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST

 

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.

Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.

Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.

And her husband is on the back of the milk carton

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Announcements

  • NEW ADDRESS FOR MEMBERS GREYFORUMS.ORG

×
×
  • Create New...