A Story of Responsibility

[jessdecutie18]

Some of you know a little about my previous experience with parrots, but I wanted to go into more detail in a story of how I learnt of responsibility with parrots. Perhaps someone will learn from my mistakes...

 

Ive always been fascinated with birds, and always knew Id be a parrot person when I 'grew up'. My first bird was a parakeet when I was really little. We were best friends, and my parents always clipped her wings. She would ride around on my shoulder and play in my hair... She was a sweet little thing. She lived a happy life, then died sometime in middle school. It was so sad. After that I dragged my parents to pet stores every time we went out, so I could watch the birds.

 

Finally, about 5 years ago, I learned a tough lesson firsthand when I purchased a little Quaker parrot from a flea market. I'd had my eye on her a couple weeks, she was so cute and little. I loved her so much... She had a lovely cage, full of toys and a happy hut she loved to sleep in, placed right in front of my bedroom window. She learnt a few phrases... We really did have some fun times, Ive got some great pictures of her. But all didn't stay so wonderful.

 

She had what I now know of as a two week honeymoon phase, wonderful with everyone. Then she became really possessive of me, and my parents wanted nothing else to do with her after a couple nasty nips. She was to stay in my room only. We still had a good time for a while, but I was still in school and was not prepared for the commitment. In less than a year, things turned from happy to very very sad. She started biting me, probably unhappy from lack of attention... She was never allowed out of my room, my parents didn't want the mess. She got kind of wild, flying into things, so I clipped her feathers, hoping that would help. I had kept her unclipped before then, realizing now that I was old enough to think for myself that I loved watching her fly and couldn't imagine her without flight. I only clipped out of desperation... NO clipping failed miserably, it depressed her and then she started pulling feathers. She stopped talking... I was horrified and hurt... I'd cry when I saw her doing the feather pulling, open her cage and try to get her to step up, but she got to where she would bite me all the time. She had all these lovely toys, good food... Nothing seemed to matter. It was a huge mess, and none of it was her fault, I just didn't know what I was getting into and handled everything wrong. I never did have enough time for her.

 

Well luckily this terrible story does have a happy ending! In exasperation, I reached out to a man I knew at school, a friends father, who said several birds of his own, including several different parrots. I refused to let Yoshi go to a home that I couldn't check up on her... I just wanted her happy again. I told the man my story, and ended up giving him Kiwi the Quaker with her cage, food and accessories, and even her stand, for free. He turned out to be a breeder, and offered me a cute baby lovebird when it was finished hand feeding, saying that I should give another bird a chance since I loved them so much. I wouldn't accept anything... I just wanted him to take Kiwi and make her happy...

 

I remember when he came to my house to get Kiwi... He was so firm and so brave with her. He picked her up from her cage and she started biting him and he said "none of that" in a calm voice and just continued to hold her. He had her for about 10 minutes and she calmed down, exploring his arm and shoulder. He told me she would be fine, just needed some time and training, and laughed as she bit him when he put her back in the cage. He took her... And OMG that was hard! At that point I couldn't even hold her very often anymore, but I still loved her, and I cried and cried and cried. It broke my heart to see her leaving, and I stared at the empty spot in my room every morning with sadness. My parents were worried, my Mom wondered if we should get her back... God it makes me cry just thinking about all this again...

 

But two weeks passed, and each time I called the guy said I needed to give it more time. Finally, after a month, the guy let me come over and see Kiwi and she was like a different bird! She was happily talking again, chattering with the two other Quakers in the cage next to hers. The guy said she had takin a liking to both one of the other Quakers and a Conure, and that she ignored everyone else. Lol. She still had biting and feather issues but they were working on it. I could tell things were much happier for her now. It made me happy and I promised I'd try again someday with another parrot.

 

Well I never did visit Kiwi after that time, I learnt a couple months later that she was doing very well and had her own little place in the flock. After high school I joined the Air Force, got married, and last year decided it was time to try again. This time I did soooooo much research... I wanted to know all I could, and I quickly decided that Id try a Grey this time. It's so much different now, having my own place with my husband, and not being restricted by other's rules. I searched for a good breeder and a young grey...

 

So now I have Yoshi! I got her from a great breeder, finished hand feeding her between me and my husband, tried my best to socialize her from the beginning. Bought her a double macaw cage for plenty of room... Figured why not give her as big a space as possible? She has plenty of toys... Is out of her cage everyday for several hours. She loves tasting human food and being a part of the family! She has a stand in the bedroom and living/dining room, so she can be with us throughout the house. Most important she gets love and attention every day. She has her issues, mainly just with yelling for attention as she is a bit spoiled, but we are working on that. I am determined to give Yoshi a loving home for life, and work through any issues together I love her to death, she is everything I wanted her to be and more. She is always so excited to see me, and it is great being able to properly take care of her. I could go on about Yoshi forever, lol, but don't want to make this longer than it already is

 

I just want anyone considering a parrot, for themselves or for someone else, to know that it is a HUGE responsibility. With my experience owning a parrot while still living with your parents is not a good idea unless your parents are already bird people parrots require a lot of attention and aren't suited for a busy school kid... I know there are exceptions but I wasn't one of them. My experiences with that quaker taught me a lot, the tough way. I will never forget those mistakes I made with her. I also doubt Ill ever clip Yoshi's wings... Birds are meant to fly, period, in my opinion. Unfortunately Yoshi's wings were clipped after just one first flight by the breeder, something Im very sad about, but at a year and two months old now she is slowly getting new flight feathers, 4 so far, and I can't wait until she can truly experience flight! She is my baby and I love her to death... Both through the good moments and tough ones. I know that she is my responsibility for years and years to come, and that's fine with me I'm ready for that now

 

Thankyou for reading

 

 

EDITED ~ Here are some more pictures of Kiwi

 

http://picasaweb.google.com/jmcase1426/Kiwi#

Edited June 21, 2010 by jessdecutie18

[Jayd]

So meaningful and true, deeply thank you. Jayd and Maggie

[judygram]

Thanks so much Jess for opening your heart and telling us your story, it just about brought me to tears but I am so grateful you shared it with us, this is so true and I hope it helps someone else thinking of getting a bird or a grey to really think about it thoroughly before committing to getting one, we owe them so much.

[Lambert58]

What a great lesson to share. That you learned that lesson so early on, is fantastic and speaks volumes to your maturity. I'm envious, in that I wish I'd discovered my love of birds as early as you did. You will be a great parront for your entire life.

 

Thank you for sharing, and I'm glad you joined the AF

[Joolesgreyuk]

What a wonderful story and much of it I can relate to. As kids we can't possibly understand the comitment in taking on a parrot. I have my own story of my elder children and 3 tiels. If only we all knew then what I know now but with no computer or internet there was no advice readily available. You know I didn't even know there was such a thing as an avian vet it until fairly recently. Like you I knew from an early age I was a bird person but didn't know enough to keep one.

 

Don't beat yourself up, your story has a happy ending. Life itself is a learning curve and with age comes wisdom - hopefully.

[pearllyn]

Such a sad story Jess, thank you for sharing, it can't have been easy. But at least something good did come of it, you learned and became the person you are today from it. I had a similar experience many years ago with a conure.

[danmcq]

What a great story. I must say, even being so young, you did the right thing in seeking out an experienced parrot person that gave Kiwi what she needed.

 

Many adults that buy a parrot on a whim, fail then blame the bird just give it to anyone that will take it and that cycle continues over and over until that parrot finally lands in an experienced, caring and loving home.

 

Even in what you see a failure, I see a person taking true ownership of the situation and making it right!

[Lyric]

Thanks for sharing your story with us. The pictures of Kiwi are beautiful and I'm glad she had a happy ending. Sometimes it takes an experience like this to teach us a lesson. At least you learned something and took the experience on with you through life.

[jessdecutie18]

What a great story. I must say, even being so young, you did the right thing in seeking out an experienced parrot person that gave Kiwi what she needed.

 

Many adults that buy a parrot on a whim, fail then blame the bird just give it to anyone that will take it and that cycle continues over and over until that parrot finally lands in an experienced, caring and loving home.

 

Even in what you see a failure, I see a person taking true ownership of the situation and making it right!

 

Thanks Dan

 

I really hadn't thought about that, It felt natural to make sure Kiwi ended up happier than she was with me or I wouldn't have been able to part with her.

[katana600]

Jess, Kiwi is beautiful and your story tells what a kind heart you have, Yoshi is lucky to have you. There will come a day when you can "pay it forward" by mentoring a young friend and using your life experience to help someone else build a relationship such as you now have with Yoshi. I agree with Dan that you overcame your own needs at the time and put Kiwi's health and happiness in the hands of someone experienced with birds who knew how to help her overcome her frustration and that is real love. It must have been so painful for you and I can tell it still is, but knowing she is happy and you were willing to share with us and help someone else, honey you are the success here.

[jessdecutie18]

Thanks guys for all your nice comments

[Janfromboone]

Wonderful story!! Thanks for sharing. I'll say that anyone who lives long enough will have regrets. It's all part of what makes you such a good parront to Yoshi.

.

[luvgrey]

This story is such a learning tool for many first-time parrot owners. We are such people and have made many mistakes along the way in the last 4 months of ownership. We do not have any major problems aside from the biting at times. It is wonderful to hear of others experiences with these great winged creatures that probably would be really happy to live in a warm climate flying from tree to tree. We all strive to make their lives as peaceful and happy as possible in our homes. Thanks again for your story.