Just Realized!!!

[Jayd]

Sitting alone today, going over some of our poorly kept notes, I realized something really sad. I can not prove this, but I believe this sincerely. I've notice this in al most all our rescue and re-home bird's, especially with CAG's, they make it so easy to see..Stockholm Syndrome! a term I and others like to use is, "baggage"[?] I've noted in my notes that a re-home/rescue never forgets they're previous owners, good or bad. This really shows in a CAG, or TOO, ETC,

These poor babies when they don't think your listening or around, bring up names, or questions, or say things that are down right scary. Maybe Stockholm Syndrome isn't the right word, I'll have to research it. I've seen it in most all the birds we've worked with, it's so sad now that I realize it. I'll post examples later............

Jayd

[pearllyn]

That is so sad Jay, I certainly am not surprised that they never forget, but it is just tragic to think these birds either will always miss their old family if it was a good experience or will never forget a bad one. Am I right in saying Stockolm syndrome is where a hostage develops positive feelings for and in some cases idolizes their captors?

I wish more people would realise the impact they have on these creatures before they take them on, you see first hand, Jay and Maggie, the damage that is caused by an impulsive action, and we've seen it lately in threads here, how a person realises they don't actually want a bird, so just get rid of it. Tragic.

[Joolesgreyuk]

You would think it great that they can remember something from so long ago but some things are best forgotton. Parrots are humanlike in so many ways, again not always a good thing. I've always known they have long memories because they take so long to trust again after bad experiences from previous owners, so sad.

 

Lyn is right we seem to have had a spate of new posters seemingly regretting the purchase of a parrot, unfortunately for some it isn't just confined to birds/animals, people don't seem to take responsibility for any living thing including their own children, they go ahead and have a baby and then offload it or neglect it. It's all too familliar.

[Luvparrots]

I think my Sully shows a couple of good examples. His obsession with walking over to his food bowls with finger food I give him so his food won't drop on the floor of his cage is from his former days. When I got him his feet where so filthy and crusted with poop his feet were sore. I wouldn't drop my food either in that case. Now his cage is cleaned everyday and new paper spread. Another example is: first let me explain, I don't let Sully on my arm anymore as he likes to run his tongue across my arm and "latch" on with his beak. (Because of medications I take I can't afford to bleed or get an affection.) I always use his ladder to pick him up as he still doesn't have the ability to fly. Anyway, one day and the only time I did this, I used a stick to try and pick him up to put him back into his cage. Sully saw that stick screamed and ran in sheer terror from the sight of the stick in my hand. Someone must have hit him in one of his other homes because Sully was terrified. I immediately put the stick away and got his ladder to pick him up with all the while telling him how sorry I was that I had scared him. Sully will always have a home with me as long as I am able. No one will every harm him again.

[Joolesgreyuk]

That is so sad Janet, how could anyone hit such a small creature..

[Greywings]

I know of several birds who have suffered physical trauma in their past homes and one or two others who had witnessed violence. A friend on the East coast has a bird that screams like a woman being beaten and sobs out a please stop. Very disturbing baggage indeed. Fortunately there are many birds who come to us from happy homes and the birds are well adjusted and make the transition smoothly having less to deal with and fewer learned suspicions.

[esknomoe]

My CAG, Brutus, is 12. His previous owner, a young man, got him when he was a teenager, and eventually got married and moved out of the house. They didn't take Brutus with them, and he was left with his elderly grandmother. I don't know for sure, but I believe the reason they decided to rehome Brutus was because the grandmother had neither the patience, nor the desire, to interact with a very smart Grey. Brutus will still say things, in the old lady's voice like "Brutus is a BAD BAD boy." Or "Brutus is a BAD bird." Or "Get out of here."

It saddens me when I hear him say this stuff; and I never repeat, or acknowledge him when he says them. I work daily on being as positive with him, in the things I say to him, and don't make a big deal out of any misdeeds. He really is a good boy, and doesn't have any terribly unacceptable habbits.

[Greywings]

Good for you, Brutus will use those words less frequently as the years pass but they may never entirely disappear. I think the older generation had that mind set of calling people instead of the behavior bad. I know I grew up with those labels being used in the home and swore I would never so that to my kids or fids. Keep up the positive feed back with him.

[Jayd]

Lyn, yes your correct. Hitting a bird or using a stick or some other object is probably the most commom of abuses, second to: not feeding, abusive language, putting in a closet and dirty surroundings. One of the biggest abuses to me is people who buy a bird knowingly on a trial basis, oh well, it don't match our wallpaper![this is true] Especially with Gray's, they don't understand, one or 2 days with people who showed no positive emotion?, to quote Spock, "not logical!", if a Grey is yelled at or locked in his cage, he can figure that out, but here today and gone tomorrow, they have nothing to base what happened on or why!

I have fids that don't even trust you to feed them!! Joey, a couple of months ago said when I was in the other room, "Raymond, are you going to feed me? There's Freddy, 1 of our TOO's, some of you have seen his photo's, 19 yr's old, he'll never fly, and Maggie is finally teaching to perch, kind of! When you turn the lights out, he screams "DARK, DARK", and if your out of sight or sound to long, he cries "Freedy here, Bob, Bob, Freddy bad". More later.... Jayd

[esknomoe]

Of my 5 dogs and 3 parrots, only 1 was purchased by me, as the first owner. All of the other dogs and birds are rescues or rehomes. My White Eyed Conure is one of the oddest. She was about 6 or 7 years old when we got her last fall. When the previous owners, a husband and wife, had their first baby, they relegated Phoebe, the Conure, to a spare bedroom, for several years. She was fed nothing but seeds, and had absolutely no human interaction, other than being fed, watered, and her cage cleaned, occasionally. As a result, she has an overgrown beak, because of fatty liver. Getting her to eat healthier, even pellets, has been a chore. The oddest thing is that she is scared of humans, and will not step up on a finger, unless she is on the floor; but she will climb onto Buddy; one of our Black Labs' back, and ride around. She absolutely loves Buddy the dog. It's very strange.

[judygram]

It is very disturbing to read these stories of how some greys have been abused from former homes, I know my two parrots have never had to encounter such mistreatment since they both came to me as just weaned babies but it breaks my heart to think of those poor animals having to endure such horrendous behavior from humans who should know better, at least the ones who have been rehomed with our members have gone on to great homes and treated with the love and respect they deserve.

Jay, you and Maggie are GODS in my eyes and I thank you two from the bottom of my heart for what you do, you are so blessed.

[Jayd]

One thing we've noticed about the forum, every one has so much to contribute, no less then we do, we all have a great love for all creatures, even each other....Jayd, Maggie, Spock and the Flock........

[Xtreme575]

You all broke my heart with these posts. For those of you who have taken on the rehomed birds, thank you. For the rest of us, this is a great reminder to treat our fids well, and to try to give them the happiest, most successful lives with us. On a side note, I have yet to recommend parronthood to anyone else. Anyone who meets my parrot and thinks he's "cool", I immediately start describing the work and patience, not to mention the expense in the hopes that they will not get one. I just can't stand the thought of people getting one on a trial-basis, my obsession with birds started when I was very young, and I waited a lot of years before actually making my dream come true. To bad there wasn't enforced cool-down periods for people to visit with the birds for a certain amount of time before they were able to adopt them... Or prove that they are actually bird people who know what they are getting themselves into.

[JillyBeanz]

You know what strikes me about this - birds are the only animals who can talk and reiterate the experiences "shared" by their owners. It makes me think of all the other animals who can't speak out

 

The rescues talked about on here are the lucky ones - they've found you lot - and I thank you from the bottom of my heart

[casper]

Taking on a bird who has been abused in someway or even any kind of rescue bird takes someone with a big heart and lots of love and patience. I think you have to be prepared for setbacks before any rewards come along but the progress is so rewarding no matter how small it may be.

Some of these stories are terrible, I would like to thank everyone on here who has re homed a bird and share the happiness it brings, each day is special for me with Tully, every bird deserves a second chance and a normal life.

[danmcq]

My CAG, Brutus, is 12. His previous owner, a young man, got him when he was a teenager, and eventually got married and moved out of the house. They didn't take Brutus with them, and he was left with his elderly grandmother. I don't know for sure, but I believe the reason they decided to rehome Brutus was because the grandmother had neither the patience, nor the desire, to interact with a very smart Grey. Brutus will still say things, in the old lady's voice like "Brutus is a BAD BAD boy." Or "Brutus is a BAD bird." Or "Get out of here."

It saddens me when I hear him say this stuff; and I never repeat, or acknowledge him when he says them. I work daily on being as positive with him, in the things I say to him, and don't make a big deal out of any misdeeds. He really is a good boy, and doesn't have any terribly unacceptable habbits.

 

I wonder if Brutus is not telling you his sad story on purpose, to see or hear your thoughts of him or for assurance he is NOT? I also wonder, if when you hear this,if you walked in and said "Brutus is a good boy" in a high pitched happy voice with smile to match and tell him afterwards "I love you" gentley.

 

I don't know if this will help wth a parrot or not, but as smart as they are, I suspect he thinks he is "Bad". We all know all people and critters of all types can overcome those "Bad" feelings and guilt in a positive reinforcing atmosphere with people that care and love them unconditionally.