What to Do if I Leave You my Friend....

[Luvparrots]

Being one of the older members here and having a very young grey, I worry about what happens if I should leave this part of my life. Life is uncertain and certainly unpredictable so it is something we all need to think about. It is not the responsibility of our family to figure out the re-homing of our birds, it is ours.

 

So even if this is not a pleasant thing to think about, what would happen to your grey/fids if for some reason you were no longer available to care for them? What would you want done to insure the future happiness of your grey?

[pearllyn]

This is something I do think about often Janet. If something happened to me, I know without doubt that David would look after Alfie, but if, Heaven forbid, something happened to both of us, that's a different matter. I don't have any other family who are in a position to look after Alfie just now, and I think the only provision I could make would be to leave her with an animal charity. We have several smaller ones in the borders and the feeling I have is that these people who look after waifs and strays out of their own pocket or through fundraising, love animals enough to take good care of Alfie and find her a loving home. The rescue centre where I got Megan from vetted me before I could bring her home - I think I even needed a reference from my vet if I remember correctly. It's all just too painful so I think the best thing would be just to live until I'm about 110, then hopefully she and I will be ready to pop off together.

Good thread though Janet - it is certainly something that needs thought about.

[Dave007]

I'll only say this so that whatever your decision is, it'll be easier. Remember that parrots are wild animals and can adapt to different homes much more easily than domestic animals. Now would be the time to speak to relatives and friends about their feelings on what you're talking about and how you're feeling now. Making plans way ahead of time is the easier thing to do rather than having to make quick decisions later on. You can discuss it with others at a slower pace and you'll have the opportunity to see how others feel. You'll have the opportunity to tell others about your feelings towards your bird. You can check out options.

You ask *****What would you want done to insure the future happiness of your grey? *****

Now is the time for you to see what's available as far as options. It's one of the more difficult subjects to talk about but you can somewhat control what happiness your bird will get. It may not be the same type but birds accept many kinds of happiness. Just think about all the abused and abandoned adult birds that are adopted and wind up being happy.

[Xtreme575]

I'm hoping that I've timed it well enough that Paco and I can go near the same time... I turn 35 this year, he turns one. So, if I can hang in there to nearly 80, I'm hoping I don't have to worry about it. Being a realist though, I know that accidents can and do happen. In that regard, my mom loves Paco, and would love to have a stronger relationship with him. My dad would prefer not to have a pet, but knowing Paco was mine, he'd be all to happy to have my mom take him on. From there, my youngest nephew is Paco's next favourite after me. He is 7 now, so I figure worst case scenario, he'd get him between 25 - 30... Barring that, the breeder I got him from will rehome him for me, a promise she asked me to make when I bought him from her. I'm certain that I've taken enough provisions to make sure that he will be ok if I am not. It's good to be real folks, I've had my will done since my early 20's, and I keep it on my computer so that I've been able to keep it current - remember, it must be printed with two witnesses to be considered valid and legal in most countries.

[kittykittykitty]

I am 82 and we, the family, have talked about it. My husband died four years ago. I mentioned before my great grand-daughter is the only one young enough to possibley live as long as or even outlive Precious. My grand-daughter, Tiernin's mom, is the one who gave Precious to my husband. Precious is an inegral part of the family. As such it is my understanding she will continue to have a home with one or more of us as the need arises. All the family are with her at various times so none of them are strangers to her. I know everyone doesn't have this luxury, but it has given me peace of mind to know that three other generations love her and appear willing to give her the loving care she so richly desrves.

[Xtreme575]

Howardine, that is a fantastic agreement in your family. My bird-sitter's family had the same kind of situation with their grandmother. She had two amazons, when she went, the agreement was that someone in the family would take the birds, and they would keep them together. The sweet part of the story, the family fought over the birds more than they did the house or the money. The birds are still around, living in northern Alberta, they are estimated to be in their 30's now. These are the kind of stories that take my breath away!

[danmcq]

GreYt topic and important things to consider, just as you do when preparing wills etc. for you human family and how things are to go.

 

We are all very fragile and do not know when or how. It is always wise to thnik about this very uncomfortable topic a head of time and update your wishes as the change over time.

 

I have no family members that I would trust to give Dayo a good and free life. They are too young and busy with their children presently.

 

Believe it or not, I would prefer Dayo to go to an older family with one or both being at home so Dayo could have plenty of freedom and interaction. I do not want him cage bound 12 hours a day.....

[Talon]

This is so thought provoking, but I believe we have all given these difficult decisions lots of thought already. I have willed 2 of my birds individually to 2 of my 4 children based on how they have bonded with the different ones at this point. I also have a life ins. policy to be divided upon my children so they will have the finances to take care of my birds needs. I still have to add Nilah to my will.....but have yet to do so......my kids are ages 11-21, so things can change, but for the time being, this is the way it is.

[lovethatgrey]

This is a sad but important topic for me. There are 2 people in the US who I would have liked to have Emma and Sachi live with. I live in Canada

The crazy load of paperwork and the imposed "QUARANTINE" in some kind of facility would have such a negative impact on the both of them. I'm sure it would be drastic for them and I worry a lot about that. I will try to find a VERY good home for them in Canada so I don't have to put them through that.

[reggieroo]

Well my thinking when I got Murphy was I now have a 6 month old baby daughter Ella-Rose, so the two of them will grow up together as friends. When mine & Kate's time comes, hopefully Ella-Rose will love him so much that there will be no question that she will have him in her life. We're both in our early thirties so depending on how long Murphy lives then we may still all be around in his last days....who knows? Bit sad thinking about all this

[Luvparrots]

Thanks to all of you who have responded to this thread. I believe it is an interesting and necessary thing to talk about with your family and seriously consider when you plan the disposition of your estate.

[Tricky]

*Is 19 years old and chooses not to think about this*

 

But Jacques would probably stay with my mom or with my best friend.

[eubankclare]

Hi

I havent got my gray yet, im 26 prob 27 when I get him/her, My partner has a 10 year old daughter and im hoping to have children in the future so hopefully there will be a safe secure family for my bird when I pass away.

[jessdecutie18]

Well Im 20 now so hopefully I have a lot of years ahead of me with Yoshi... But if anything happened to me Yoshi would most likely go to my Mom. I know my husband wouldn't care for her like I do, he gets irritated just by how much I talk about her and I post more here than I ever tell him lol.

[reggieroo]

Well Im 20 now so hopefully I have a lot of years ahead of me with Yoshi... But if anything happened to me Yoshi would most likely go to my Mom. I know my husband wouldn't care for her like I do, he gets irritated just by how much I talk about her and I post more here than I ever tell him lol.

 

There's normally always one partner who cares more about our greys & then other just tolerates them........lol. Kate take the micky out of me "on that parrot forum again!"

[jessdecutie18]

lol reggieroo yep! Mike thinks I'm crazy for coming here so often. Just last night Yoshi started playing with a toy I made her that she hadn't touched before. I was excited "look Mike, she's chewing on one of the beads of her new toy!" and Mike's like so what? They just don't understand lol

[Janfromboone]

I wondered if the forums wouldn't help place birds. I told my nephew and neice to get on the grey forum and see if someone wanted Tobie. I really don't have anyone in my family that would want to make the commitment. My neice and nephew are too unsettled now. Who knows about later when I die.

[Spinner]

We have our birds in our wills, so there's no question about our wishes regarding our Greys. We talked it over with our family members and made the decisions as to their future homes (they will statistically outlive us).

 

Our lawyer was somewhat surprised. As an ex-probate lawyer for the State, he thought he'd seen it all.

[katana600]

Okay, so here is how it goes for me and mine. I am making sure my twenty-something daughters have positive interactions with Kopi and Java and so far, they each say they would care for them when I am gone. But how far can you trust kids? So, I have a couple of really good friends and have encouraged them to get over the fear threshold, hold the birds, care for them and they come live at my house when I go away, so the birds are well acquainted with them. But my real plan... that is to have grandchildren, lavish them with attention... get my grubby mitts on them when they are infants and hopefully babysit while moms are working. Then, I will indoctrinate them to be the best bird lovers and caretakers that Kopi and Java could hope to find. Then, I have plan D... or plan Dee and things get more planned and complicated with each step. In all seriousness though, it is similar to bringing children into the world, the best laid plans can fall through, so teaching them good manners and caring for their needs so they grow up strong and productive members of our family and greater world is the best insurance we can give them. When we want to spoil them rotten and could, we step back a second and think if that will serve them well to get along with others and do what is right even when it is hard. Kudos for starting a thread conversation that helps all of us. Thanks.