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F.A.R.T


JillyBeanz

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As the self nominated member of the Fid Alcoholics Recovery Team (F.A.R.T) I will start the thread.

 

Hello, my name is Jill, I'm 34 and my 33 week old Parrot (Jesus, is that all he is!) has driven me to drink.

 

This, of course, is a huge lie - I had a loving for the odd tipple before - Harvey's just helped me along the way. Oh - and here I am with a bottle of beer in my hand! Whoops - some leader I am!!! ;)

 

Anyone else got a problem they'd like to share? ;)

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Seeing as I have three reasons to drink (fids, kids and husband) I belong here!!!

 

Sorry for the delay there - had to get a tissue to wipe away the tears of laughter from reading the other posts. Oh wait, you didn't see that delay. Damn, (and this is the only place I can say that without it being repeated!) I really do need to be here.

 

Please don't try to cure us of our way of dealing with errant birds, especially those that are probably smarter than we are at times. Will have to say, the picutre of Harvey whistling at the man on the street was hysterical and would have driven me to drink if it had been me.

 

Someone pass the peanuts.

 

--

 

Robin

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As the self nominated counsellor I'd like to advise Julie to chop her ears off - how dare you have something that Beau enjoys nipping - actually you're greedy - you have two (I presume). Alcohol will numb the process of removing them!

 

The rest of you obviously share my passion for the odd alcoholic beverage - I tell you what's worried me tho - why are we all women!!!!!

 

Robin, I only have the two problems to send me to drink - the parrot and the husband - because this week the kids have gone off on holiday with the family!! Yeah! :lol:

 

Same time next week (when I will be totally alone as the kids will still be away and Michael's going to London to see U2) and therefore there'll only be Harvey to drive me to drink! :unsure:

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Robin, have you been on the happy juice already? I'm afraid, like Weight Watchers, you are only allowed to attend once a week and Friday is our meeting day!!!! :laugh:

 

I've diversed since last Friday. I've decided that the drink wasn't a good idea and have turned to biscuits. I used to be 50Kg, but since Friday I am fast approaching 100Kg!!! My liver will be fine, but my stomach will be bulging!!! :laugh:

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OK, It's Friday, let's get this meeting going so we can all get back to our drinks.

 

Reasons to imbibe this week:

 

1. Cleaning Dixie's cage - Dixie must attack white paper towel used to wipe bottom of cage.

 

2. Cleaning Dixie's cage - Dixie dropping food on my head.

 

3. Cleaning Dixie's cage - Dixie standing on my head while I attempt to change paper.

 

4. Don't get in the way of Grey and Chicken Noodle Soup.

 

5. Got an A in both Business Law and Civil Litigation (should be 2 reasons there).

 

6. School starts on Tuesday here - First football game tonight.

 

7. Dixie deciding that she suddenly likes me like crazy - then won't come near me five minutes later.

 

Enough reasons - fire up the blender!

 

--

 

Robin

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Business Law and Civil Litigation!! As! I'm mates with a genius everyone!!! Never mind the list Robin - the qualifications do it for me!!! :cheer:

 

May I add number 8:

 

8. Harvey's just chewed a chunk of plaster out of the corner of my study wall (whilst pretending he was biting a toy!

 

Blender? Just give the ingredients - I'll blend them in my mouth!!

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Ha Ha! No - I'm in the house - I'm like a pilot light - I never go out!! :laugh:

 

I've just endured two hours of some crap teenage movie (night in with Katie after her trip to Norfolk with Michael's aunty and uncle) with dips, nachos, chocolate and oh - yes, there might have been the ODD glass of vino blanco (for me - she's 15 and not going down the same path I did!!!) tossed in along the way!!! :lol:

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Back for second half of meeting - ballgame canceled due to rain, dinner at Carraba's with hubby and kid -only one glass of Sangria with dinner, but it was a big glass.

 

Sterling will be the next reason for having to indulge the tequila, that or one or both of the daughters next crisis. Sarah (20) went on date with new boy - he's 6'7" - and I thought my hubby was tall at 6'4"! At least I'm still taller than the 13 yr old!

 

--

 

Robin

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